Alwaysbecauseofyou Posted March 25, 2012 Posted March 25, 2012 Hi I have been trying to get this girl that I have known for about 4 months. We talk to each other here and there via text msg, in person and sometimes phone. We have been out a few times to dinners, ice cream, grocery shopping etc... A few days ago, she began to stop talking to me. I tried to call her a few times and sent a few texts but not one single reply. Suddenly she then text me saying that we should be friends... I did not explicitly state my feelings for her but I guess she sort of figured it out somehow... I guess this is a form of advanced rejection? What should I do? Forget and move on or just to swing it back to life? Thanks in advance. I am truly confused at the moment...
jobaba Posted March 25, 2012 Posted March 25, 2012 Hi I have been trying to get this girl that I have known for about 4 months. We talk to each other here and there via text msg, in person and sometimes phone. We have been out a few times to dinners, ice cream, grocery shopping etc... A few days ago, she began to stop talking to me. I tried to call her a few times and sent a few texts but not one single reply. Suddenly she then text me saying that we should be friends... I did not explicitly state my feelings for her but I guess she sort of figured it out somehow... I guess this is a form of advanced rejection? What should I do? Forget and move on or just to swing it back to life? Thanks in advance. I am truly confused at the moment... It's pretty cut and dry. She's not attracted to you and is not romantically interested. Now, either shes a cool girl and she respects you as a person and will continue to be your friend... or she's a no good shallow petty twit who held a patronizing 'friendship' with you and wouldn't seriously consider the thought of you in her social circle let alone her daily life. Sorry ... bitter rant.
SmileFace Posted March 25, 2012 Posted March 25, 2012 It's pretty cut and dry. She's not attracted to you and is not romantically interested. Now, either shes a cool girl and she respects you as a person and will continue to be your friend... or she's a no good shallow petty twit who held a patronizing 'friendship' with you and wouldn't seriously consider the thought of you in her social circle let alone her daily life. Sorry ... bitter rant. Omg, it seems the trolls are getting to the people on this board ... Hehe
TaraMaiden Posted March 25, 2012 Posted March 25, 2012 Hi I have been trying to get this girl that I have known for about 4 months. We talk to each other here and there via text msg, in person and sometimes phone. We have been out a few times to dinners, ice cream, grocery shopping etc... A few days ago, she began to stop talking to me. I tried to call her a few times and sent a few texts but not one single reply. Suddenly she then text me saying that we should be friends... I did not explicitly state my feelings for her but I guess she sort of figured it out somehow... I guess this is a form of advanced rejection? What should I do? Forget and move on or just to swing it back to life? Thanks in advance. I am truly confused at the moment... I think that it's not confusion you feel. i think it's some degree of disappointment coupled with the surprise that she read you quite well... You must have made it a lot more obvious than you thought... and basically, she's trying to let you know now, before you expend any more energy on finding ways to approach her - that it won't work. The 'let's just be friends' is a way of telling you she's comfortable with that - but no further. And don't be surprised if she lays low, or you don't see her for a while. she may try to avoid you, because if she knows you have romantic feelings for her, she won't want to encourage that...
jerbear Posted March 25, 2012 Posted March 25, 2012 Other than hanging out, did you, the OP; try to get it on with her? 4 months is a long time. Did you try to kiss her? If I like someone, I usually go for a kiss on the lips by the 3rd date. Usually a kiss on the cheek after the first date.
mixwell Posted March 25, 2012 Posted March 25, 2012 Other than hanging out, did you, the OP; try to get it on with her? 4 months is a long time. Did you try to kiss her? If I like someone, I usually go for a kiss on the lips by the 3rd date. Usually a kiss on the cheek after the first date. I agree, if I am into a female for more than friends I make sure to let it be known and persue her right away. If you played the friend role this whole time without making a move then she might only see you as just that but either way she specifically said she just wants to be friends so there really isn't anything you can do. OP mentioned calling and txting a few times with was probably too much to begin with. If you called her once that would've been enough. She would have seen the missed call and IF she were legit into you she would have made it a point to call you back but her actions are clearly showing that she doesn't feel mutual about the interest so I would just let it go. If you want to be just friends then cool but I wouldn't remain friends in the hopes of getting with her someday because you're just wasting your time.
Author Alwaysbecauseofyou Posted March 25, 2012 Author Posted March 25, 2012 Thanks for the replies so far. It seems from general consensus that I should really stop wasting time and resources into this one girl and move on. However, do you think it is a good idea if I made myself clear 100% in person to her on my exact feelings? I think it was sort of a "One Way Debate" where she had everything to say and I was left speechless. I want to tell her exactly how I feel and why I feel that way (In 1 weeks time)... Either it will end up a disaster and we can never speak to each other again or it will be cool and alright... I will have to find out! Thanks
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