christine393 Posted March 24, 2012 Posted March 24, 2012 He texted me yesterday. He had tried last month to contact me but I held steadfast and ignored him. He said "How are you doing?" And I replied "I got a new job. How are you?" He replied that he wasn't doing that well. And he hasn't figured out his job situation or life situation. That he has no clue what he wants to do with his life and he hates his living situation at the moment. But he was happy I was doing so well. We broke up because he wanted to be independent and I assumed that meant, "I want to sleep with other women." I still feel very much in love with him but I have too much pride to contact him first. Sigh.. Back to no contact? What does it mean when a man does this?! ANY help appreciated..
rAFC Posted March 25, 2012 Posted March 25, 2012 It is difficult to say what it means. Probably one of two things, he is either simply wondering how you are doing since it is hard to just forget someone you had a relationship with OR he is realizing that his life isn't better off without you and that the grass isn't greener on the other side. Unfortunately, there is no way to know what he is thinking by this limited contact. I'd go back to no contact and keep moving forward. If he is regretting his decision then he will let you know beyond any doubt that he wants you back. Don't get your hopes up just yet and continue your healing. 2
nana841121 Posted March 25, 2012 Posted March 25, 2012 Keep NC.Don't focus on his intention. It doesn't matter.
cflowers32 Posted March 25, 2012 Posted March 25, 2012 He may be being curious, but months? Months is too long. It is time for you to go out and embrace YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!! You deserve it. When you feel like not doing anything, this is what I tell myself, "Caitlin, change a thought, move a muscle!!" Get out of myself, and go do something at all, maybe something different. Go take care of you. I don't know how much he meant to you... and I know every situation is different, but after "months" you shouldn't even be wondering any more, in my book anyway. That's where you should be "ok, I'm outta here!!!!" You know you deserve better than this hanging out and wondering, and there is more to life than this. GO GIRL!!!!!!!!!!! GO DO YOU!!!!!
Author christine393 Posted March 25, 2012 Author Posted March 25, 2012 It is difficult to say what it means. Probably one of two things, he is either simply wondering how you are doing since it is hard to just forget someone you had a relationship with OR he is realizing that his life isn't better off without you and that the grass isn't greener on the other side. Unfortunately, there is no way to know what he is thinking by this limited contact. I'd go back to no contact and keep moving forward. If he is regretting his decision then he will let you know beyond any doubt that he wants you back. Don't get your hopes up just yet and continue your healing. That's very sensible. Thank you. I think he's realized the grass isn't greener but he also doesn't want to get back together. My hopes were definitely up this week but I'm squashing them down. I totally giggled when I heard "Christine, I would let that man go.." This website has helped me so much in embracing NC! I've taken up a ton of hobbies. It's been a couple months and I thought I had stopped wondering! Grr! But we were together for a long time. I told myself that I never loved him for a long time because I thought it would be easier that way. I guess I did love him though if I'm still acting lovesick!
cflowers32 Posted March 25, 2012 Posted March 25, 2012 Some how Christine, I see myself in your shoes in a few weeks, give or take. Good for you for being strong. I wish I knew the answer, that sounds like my X. We're in our 40's so his wanting to see what else is out there is really baffling, but oh well. I also am letting him go. I told him I think he's making a mistake and it will get to a point where if he does come back, it will probably be too late. I also need time to heal as I still love him, we had a pretty good relationship, but he wants his cake and eat it too and it can't be that way. Anyway, as men say about US WOMEN??? When you find the answer as to why men do the things they do, let me know. Sounds like you've done really well though, good for you!!
Author christine393 Posted March 25, 2012 Author Posted March 25, 2012 Some how Christine, I see myself in your shoes in a few weeks, give or take. Good for you for being strong. I wish I knew the answer, that sounds like my X. We're in our 40's so his wanting to see what else is out there is really baffling, but oh well. I also am letting him go. I told him I think he's making a mistake and it will get to a point where if he does come back, it will probably be too late. I also need time to heal as I still love him, we had a pretty good relationship, but he wants his cake and eat it too and it can't be that way. Anyway, as men say about US WOMEN??? When you find the answer as to why men do the things they do, let me know. Sounds like you've done really well though, good for you!! Wow! That feels very similar to my situation. You know that the man will come to regret it and miss you.. Want you back, etc. But you know that you can't take him back as much as you want to do it. You have a good attitude about it! Are you sticking to no contact? Not texting him was easy at first because I have way too much pride. But I have realized that if I'm still upset over him.. I can't deny I loved him. Moving on is tough!
cflowers32 Posted March 25, 2012 Posted March 25, 2012 Wow! That feels very similar to my situation. You know that the man will come to regret it and miss you.. Want you back, etc. But you know that you can't take him back as much as you want to do it. You have a good attitude about it! Are you sticking to no contact? Not texting him was easy at first because I have way too much pride. But I have realized that if I'm still upset over him.. I can't deny I loved him. Moving on is tough! I am sticking to it, and I will just keep coming here. This site has already been so helpful. He made the decision to do it this way, and it didn't have to be. Yeah, I love him too, there was nothing NOT to love. He and I had our retarded little tendencies like I think everyone does, but for the most part I thought we were fine. He wants different... Thank you!! You all here have been great, and I will keep rooting for you too!!! GO CHRISTINE!!!!!!!! Woo Hoo!!!
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