Lexa Posted March 22, 2012 Posted March 22, 2012 Hey guys.. I'm 21/f just looking for some advice regarding initiating contact with someone from my past I'm enamoured with that the universe seems to have thrown back my way. My first semester of college freshman year: I met a guy I really liked, I was inexperienced with men and a virgin while he was more experienced. In the end I felt led on by him, he was pretty stand-offish and flaky and eventually we stopped talking. (During this time he slept with a girl who also felt led on, she freaked out, he definitely seemed to be a 'womanizer' type so I figured 'stay the hell away'). Second semester: I got a boyfriend so I didn't think about him much, except according to both my boyfriend and best (guy) friend there were a few weird incidents of him seeming to go out of his way to talk to them. I skipped first semester of sophomore year and stayed home. Second semester sophomore year I was sitting in a lounge area when he sat across from me for what seemed like 15 minutes before striking up a conversation. He ended it by offering me his number, I didn't end up doing anything with it. This was a few years ago, never saw him again. Now I'm a second semester senior at a different college and I just saw him today, he transferred here. It's his first semester. Again, he offered me his number saying we should hang out sometime. I said "Why don't you just take mine?" so he did. It's not that I have a problem initiating contact, I have a problem initiating it with people who might ignore it or lose interest.. how they say, 'let a guy pursue you' type thing. Of course as soon as he walked away, he called my phone so that I had his number, so essentially it's the same situation again. The fact that I'm thinking about it so much and, well, posting on a forum about it makes me feel a bit lame/creepy but it really helps me process it. I just want some advice on how to handle the contact bit. Should I just send him a neutral text? There are a lot of things I could ask considering the situation i.e. "How do you like this school" but I don't want to seem desperate. What's with the fact that he gives me his number instead of asking for mine? Is there anything to that? This is actually pretty complicated and I left details out because I didn't want to make it too long, so if any more information would help me get advice I'll gladly answer.. but there's one really important part. I've had a lot of issues with promiscuity since then and sort of forgot what it's like to just like someone. I have a tendency to just get drunk with a guy and sleep with him the first time we hang out; I don't want to make those mistakes with him, but at the same time I'd rather sleep with him and get hurt than not do it at all. Sadly I forgot what it is to just hang out with a guy sober and actually feel genuine attraction. Feel free to say I'm over-thinking this and to just go with the flow, see if there's chemistry and take it from there, but I have a feeling this is going to take some strategizing on my part..
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