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Is this a subliminal way of my gf flirting with another guy right in front of me?

love818181

By love818181
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love818181 Member

love818181

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My gf and I are at the counter at Abercrombie & Fitch waiting to return an item. We've got our arms around each other. The little girl helping us is having trouble running the register so we're waiting for minutes. So we're basically standing there motionless for minutes. Finally a guy comes up (attractive A&F model type; tall and hispanic like some of her exes) and as he comes right in front of us my gf looks at him and passes her free hand through the side of her hair, pushing it back over her ear. Isn't this a preening or "look at me" thing girls do? And she did it right in front of me as we had our arms around each other. I was thinking in my head, "wtf..?" Like as if a hot girl came to the counter and I started flexing or something while holding onto my gf lol.

 

She's shown in the past (see my other thread) that she might like attention or have self esteem stuff going on.

ditzchic Established Member

ditzchic

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She probably found him attractive. And she showed it. Those signs are subconscious. You don't really think about them before you do them around someone.

 

But she was holding on to you in front of the other guy. So obviously she wasn't consciously sending him the 'Come do me' signal.

 

You say she might have low self-esteem but what about you? She's with you. Did she leave go of you? She's going to see attractive men out there but her arm is around you. Take that as a sign of where she's at.

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love818181 Member

love818181

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But I was right there. She must not think much of me..

sweetsmmr91 Established Member

sweetsmmr91

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But I was right there. She must not think much of me..

 

What? If she didn't think much of you she'd have let you go and not have her arms wrapped around you in public. Because she brushed her hair behind her ear and glanced at a guy she doesn't care enough about you?

 

Who has self esteem problems?

 

I think you're reading too much into it. I automatically do the same thing, and I automatically smile at everyone and say hi to people, and hug people I know, and generally give everyone attention. I've dated guys who get jealous. It's not about me, it's about the guy.

 

I think it's the same in your case.

veggirl Established Member

veggirl

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If she starts handing out cards with her phone # on them, then you have something to worry about.

 

Fixing her hair, arms wrapped around you, while a good looking guy happens to be standing there is not hitting on him, lol.

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verhrzn Established Member

verhrzn

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... Are you one of those people who also think the speaker on the TV set is talking directly to you?

 

Dude, she glanced at another guy and made a normal human motion. I sometimes brush my hair behind my ear while looking in the refrigerator. Does that mean I am trying to sexually attract my refrigerator? (Well, occasionally... a girl does gets lonely.)

 

You are being way, way, way too insecure about this.

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ditzchic Established Member

ditzchic

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But I was right there. She must not think much of me..

 

Right. You were right there. She stayed right there with you. It would be one thing if she eye ****ed him and started a conversation with him while rubbing her chest on his big manly arms right in front of you. She didn't. She looked and played with her hair. BFD. It's the equivalent of you sneaking a look at a girls ass real quick. It means nothing.

 

For you to think that your girlfriend shant look upon anyone else in your presence that she may be even remotely attracted to says more about you than it does about her. It's the same as the girl who started the thread last week about how she makes her boyfriend switch seats at a restaurant if a good looking girl in in his eyesight. It's a slippery slope you're heading down.

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love818181 Member

love818181

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... Are you one of those people who also think the speaker on the TV set is talking directly to you?

 

Dude, she glanced at another guy and made a normal human motion. I sometimes brush my hair behind my ear while looking in the refrigerator. Does that mean I am trying to sexually attract my refrigerator? (Well, occasionally... a girl does gets lonely.)

 

You are being way, way, way too insecure about this.

 

She doesn't move for minutes but the second the guy is there she messes with her hair. I thought girls messing with their hair is the most basic form of "look at me"

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love818181 Member

love818181

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Right. You were right there. She stayed right there with you. It would be one thing if she eye ****ed him and started a conversation with him while rubbing her chest on his big manly arms right in front of you. She didn't. She looked and played with her hair. BFD. It's the equivalent of you sneaking a look at a girls ass real quick. It means nothing.

 

For you to think that your girlfriend shant look upon anyone else in your presence that she may be even remotely attracted to says more about you than it does about her. It's the same as the girl who started the thread last week about how she makes her boyfriend switch seats at a restaurant if a good looking girl in in his eyesight. It's a slippery slope you're heading down.

 

It's not about looking. It's about the preening.

verhrzn Established Member

verhrzn

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She doesn't move for minutes but the second the guy is there she messes with her hair. I thought girls messing with their hair is the most basic form of "look at me"

 

.. I am sometimes don't move for several minutes, and then move again.

 

Ya know what, this tact really isn't working for you, so let's try another.

 

While dating your girlfriend, have you ever-even once-glanced at another girl? Like, checked out her body? Lingered over her pretty face?

 

Congrats, you have just done the same thing you think you saw your girlfriend doing.

 

Even if your girlfriend was brushing her hair back in some weird so-subtle-you'll-blink-and-miss-it come on, it really doesn't mean anything. Your girlfriend is monogamous, not dead. She is going to find other males attractive, and she might even unconsciously show it. (Just like your wandering eyes demonstrates that girl's skirt is probably too short for your gf's liking.) Your girlfriend is monogamous, not dead.

 

Stop being insecure over the smallest of gestures.

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ditzchic Established Member

ditzchic

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It's not about looking. It's about the preening.

 

I bet if you take notice to the next time you sneak a peek at a girl with a nice rack, you'll find that you stand up a bit straighter and tighten your core (or suck in your gut if you have one). That's how men posture when they see something they like. You do it. You're just not realizing it. It's a natural human reaction.

verhrzn Established Member

verhrzn

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For you to think that your girlfriend shant look upon anyone else in your presence that she may be even remotely attracted to says more about you than it does about her. It's the same as the girl who started the thread last week about how she makes her boyfriend switch seats at a restaurant if a good looking girl in in his eyesight. It's a slippery slope you're heading down.

 

Seriously?? And I thought I was insecure...

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love818181 Member

love818181

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.. I am sometimes don't move for several minutes, and then move again.

 

Ya know what, this tact really isn't working for you, so let's try another.

 

While dating your girlfriend, have you ever-even once-glanced at another girl? Like, checked out her body? Lingered over her pretty face?

 

Congrats, you have just done the same thing you think you saw your girlfriend doing.

 

Even if your girlfriend was brushing her hair back in some weird so-subtle-you'll-blink-and-miss-it come on, it really doesn't mean anything. Your girlfriend is monogamous, not dead. She is going to find other males attractive, and she might even unconsciously show it. (Just like your wandering eyes demonstrates that girl's skirt is probably too short for your gf's liking.) Your girlfriend is monogamous, not dead.

 

Stop being insecure over the smallest of gestures.

 

I bet if you take notice to the next time you sneak a peek at a girl with a nice rack, you'll find that you stand up a bit straighter and tighten your core (or suck in your gut if you have one). That's how men posture when they see something they like. You do it. You're just not realizing it. It's a natural human reaction.

 

Good points. I had previously thought it not that big a deal before and I told a couple people today about it and they said it was a bad, bad sign. But I like this forum for it's perspective. i admit I am prone to over-analyzing lol.

veggirl Established Member

veggirl

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Yo, tucking your hair behind your ear is hardly preening. :lmao:

sid3 Established Member

sid3

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Just be happy she didn't start fiddling with her necklace, that's far more serious.

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dasein Established Member

dasein

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She probably found him attractive. And she showed it. Those signs are subconscious. You don't really think about them before you do them around someone.

 

Dude, she glanced at another guy and made a normal human motion.

 

OP, you have your answer. Next time you are with your GF and a hot girl comes by, start flexing. Your GF shouldn't be irritated at all. Let us know how it goes.

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love818181 Member

love818181

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OP, you have your answer. Next time you are with your GF and a hot girl comes by, start flexing. Your GF shouldn't be irritated at all. Let us know how it goes.

 

I guess I'm allowed to! lol Next time we're holding each other and a hot girl walks by I'll stick my chest out and flex my triceps. I'm sure my gf won't mind ;))

Edited by love818181
ditzchic Established Member

ditzchic

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I guess I'm allowed to! lol Next time we're holding each other and a hot girl walks by I'll stick my chest out and flex my triceps. I'm sure my gf won't mind ;))

 

If you were my boyfriend I wouldn't mind. Flexing your triceps are for total douches. I'd be happy you want to make yourself look like an idiot to attractive women.

 

:p

sid3 Established Member

sid3

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I guess I'm allowed to! lol Next time we're holding each other and a hot girl walks by I'll stick my chest out and flex my triceps. I'm sure my gf won't mind ;))

 

I don't think that'd be a good idea. You're trying to fight a war you just can't win. Flex your muscles all you want, all she'll have to do is lick her lips for the win. Coupled with caressing her neck, well forget it. Yeah they got us beat.

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