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What are your earning potential requirements?


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Posted
My eyes would light up because I would assume you're academically minded and value debate and logic. Now, if you had said you were going for CORPORATE law, I'd be a little bit more skeptical.

 

I have no idea where some people get the idea that all lawyers make a lot of money. But at any rate, some of those girls might actually have been into you for reasons other than your "potential income." Just... keep it in mind.

 

Corporate law can be extremely convoluted from an academic perspective and isn't necessarily high-paying by any means. It's alright though, I don't expect outsiders to know that info either. :p

 

And I agree that ladies may have been interested in me after mentioning that for reasons other than my earning potential, but at the end of the day, it's more than the money. The prestige associated with both law school and the practice of law is massively inflated. In most jurisdictions, 80-90% of people pass the bar exam the first time they take it, just as an example.

Posted
teachers on Long Island make over 100k and get pensions. Bottom line money a special person a does not make. I also know how to live well on practicly nothing. The art of living well is one many people never grasp.

 

No disagreement there :cool:

Posted

As someone who works in the student loan industry it seems that everyone I speak to who has 70k-100k+ in student debt is a doctor or lawyer or is still studying to become one. Their loans are delinquent and they have no way of paying them because they're unable to find a job or they're still in residency and have no spare time available to work elsewhere. The loans will default before they're able to make payments, and then they're really SOL.

 

Not that people who have less in student loans don't struggle to make their payments, but the more you have in debt, the higher your payments are (as well as your daily interest accrual that capitalizes if it is left outstanding--I've seen debt totals that are accruing $20+ in interest PER DAY), and the longer you are without the money to pay them, the more screwed you inevitably become. This kind of thing is the reality for a majority of people who attend college today.

 

So someone may have a hell of a lot of earning power, but if you want to know about their buying power, look at how much they owe in student loans. Look at how long they're going to have that massive burden strapped to their back and see if you'll be able to afford a nice house in the suburbs and a Beemer with a baby seat that you strap your newborn brat in on solely their earnings even within 10 years.

  • Like 2
Posted

I would just say I'm totally fine being a stay at home dad.:cool:

Posted
I didn't think there were enough inflammatory threads on this forum today.

 

We can pretend that money shouldnt matter, but when it comes down to planning a future, especially for those who want children, its foolish not to consider your prospective mates finances. A woman would be a fool to sign up to be both a caregiver, and breadwinner.

 

Please discuss.

 

My personal requirement is that the guy be able to modestly support a wife and a couple of kids... Something I should be able to do in a few years, in my career; therefore making it, in my mind, a reasonable expectation. IMO that translates to a salary of about 120k per year in my area, the key word being, modestly.

 

I personally think that women don't seem to care much about a man's finances/salary until those women are ready to get married. That is why so many women waste their prime years dating bartenders and other men who generally seem to have nothing going for themselves.

  • Like 1
Posted

I have lost faith in the womenfolk.

 

I wish the qualification I need to earn love would be judged by my heart and my physical attributes. I want someone who loves me because Im good to her and she finds me good looking. But no, all they care about is money. Something external that isn't even part of my body.

 

Before I had a good job in sales. But I hated everything about it. Now Im working in the service industry. Im very happy with my job but I dont make very good money.

 

I guess its a choice I have to make in life and Im resigned that I dont have what it counts the most in the eyes of women.

Posted

 

I'd rather date a guy who makes 30k as a history teacher, and loves what he's doing.. than a guy who makes 120k and works behind a desk and gets no fulfillment from his job.

 

I dated a guy who works at an investment firm and makes tons of money, and he was just so stodgy and arrogant that I've been kind of turned off to guys with too much money. I want someone real and down to earth. So I guess for me it's all about the person, not earning potential.

 

I don't believe that you wouldn't have a problem dating someone who only made $30k/year. Someone making that little likely lacks ambition and will probably live paycheck-to-paycheck his entire life.

Posted
My last boyfriend made $35. Loved 'im to pieces.

 

My current boyfriend makes over $200k. Love 'im to pieces.

 

Be able to support yourself and love what you do. Those are my requirements.

Lol....why am I not surprised you ended up with the guy in the top 1% instead of the guy in the bottom 15%.

 

:laugh:

 

Just sayin'.

  • Like 1
Posted

Most people live beyond their means regardless of income. I've recently begun listening to Dave Ramsey on the radio. People call him with their debt dilemmas and he tells them how to solve them. Other people call in to tell the audience how they became debt free. Great information. Find out when his show is on in your area. You'd be surprised at how little you can live on.

Posted

Why are people rattling off high salary earners as if they are not the exception?

 

teachers on Long Island make over 100k and get pensions. Bottom line money a special person a does not make. I also know how to live well on practicly nothing. The art of living well is one many people never grasp.

Some teachers make that much. Many do not.

 

There are accountants that make that much. I also know teachers at private schools making $90k. Thus is NYC

Really now? My mom taught in NYC for 9 years. The median income there is about 40k for teachers. She made 60k at her highest working for the NYC board of ed. Many teachers dont even get that much and the starting salary is crap.

Posted
I have lost faith in the womenfolk.

 

I wish the qualification I need to earn love would be judged by my heart and my physical attributes. I want someone who loves me because Im good to her and she finds me good looking. But no, all they care about is money. Something external that isn't even part of my body.

 

Before I had a good job in sales. But I hated everything about it. Now Im working in the service industry. Im very happy with my job but I dont make very good money.

 

I guess its a choice I have to make in life and Im resigned that I dont have what it counts the most in the eyes of women.

 

Money has been helping unattractive guys get laid for years. It also means that the more money they have, the more attractive woman they can negotiate for.

 

So, women "loving" money is a double-edged sword. You want to be loved for your good looks.... but some men don't have good looks. And just like some girls don't care about looks, some don't care about money, which are the ones who will go for you... since the 2nd thing women apparently are after greedy is shallow.

 

So either way, both handsome/poor and ugly/rich men get a shot at a hot girl. Seems a pretty fair deal to me.

 

(Compare that to an ugly girl, who is pretty much SOL... even money ain't gonna make her more attractive to guys.)

Posted
Kaylan,

 

My reply to you disappeared, so a quick run down.

 

My point was that those with high incomes often travel in the same the social circles as each other. Thus, a nurse of physician that may know other physicians, nurses, etc is more likely to find a higher earning spouse than, say, a waiter or waitress that does not travel in those circles.

This doesnt invalidate what Ive been saying. They may travel in circles of people who are like them, but because of their requirements, these folk have a super small dating pool.

 

Considering how hard it is to find someone who fits you for a long term relationship or marriage, having only 5% of the population to date from doesnt sound like much fun...especially when these women have competition from women of many different social classes

Posted
I didn't think there were enough inflammatory threads on this forum today.

 

We can pretend that money shouldnt matter, but when it comes down to planning a future, especially for those who want children, its foolish not to consider your prospective mates finances. A woman would be a fool to sign up to be both a caregiver, and breadwinner.

 

Please discuss.

 

My personal requirement is that the guy be able to modestly support a wife and a couple of kids... Something I should be able to do in a few years, in my career; therefore making it, in my mind, a reasonable expectation. IMO that translates to a salary of about 120k per year in my area, the key word being, modestly.

 

Do you live in NYC? NO!!! Arizona and require 120k a year is a GOLDDIGGER! NO THANKS!

Posted
Lol....why am I not surprised you ended up with the guy in the top 1% instead of the guy in the bottom 15%.

 

:laugh:

 

Just sayin'.

 

"Lol"...maybe because, 3 years into our relationship, he cheated on me. Since I have self-respect, I dumped him. If his earnings were a dealbreaker, I would have been long gone before that.

 

I likely would have married him, to be honest.

 

Just sayin'.

 

I've been a member here for three years...at least do your research before making snarky presumptuous comments about my character.

  • Like 2
Posted
My expectations would be different if I didn't want kids. If that were the case, I wouldn't care about earning potential at all. But in my area, I think it would be damn hard not to struggle living in a ghetto neighborhood, with a couple of kids and a combined income under 6 figures. My parents make about that much and based on my childhood and their current predicament of not being able to retire, I know it's not that much. I make about 80k now and while it's more than enough for me to comfortably support myself, if I had a kid, I know I'd be stressed financially.

 

I would like to be able to stay at home at least until the kids are in school, be able to put them through college, and still retire before I hit the bucket. My earning potential requirements are something I expect to acheive myself within the next couple years, so I don't see why it is an unreasonable expectation.

 

You can't raise a family for 80k in ARIZONA. Are you kidding me?

  • Like 1
Posted
Additionally, guys with money tend to shy away from high earning women for a number of reasons.
No they don't. Maybe some but not all.

 

What you might prefer isn't everyone else's preference. The guys I've had relationships with and both my husband's never had a problem with it. Some men prefer independent women.

Posted

She lives in Chicago, and 120k will buy you a lease on a Dodge Dart and a Clif bar. ****ing city living man, I feel like I've accomplished nothing but higher taxes. I feel you, spooks.

  • Like 1
Posted
She lives in Chicago, and 120k will buy you a lease on a Dodge Dart and a Clif bar. ****ing city living man, I feel like I've accomplished nothing but higher taxes. I feel you, spooks.

 

If that's all you can buy on 120k you don't know **** about finance. You can raise a family anywhere but NYC on 80k if you don't piss off your dollars.

Posted (edited)
If that's all you can buy on 120k you don't know **** about finance. You can raise a family anywhere but NYC on 80k if you don't piss off your dollars.

My mom and dad raised us (my brother and I) on around 80k combined. Things were tight at times, but we lived a decent middle class upbringing.

 

In NYC it really depends on the boro, and then the neighborhood of the boro you live in, whether or not a certain amount of money is needed to raise a family well.

 

And In Chicago or NYC, 120k is def enough to live in a good suburban-ish area of the city and raise 2 kids. Staten Island and Queens are perfectly examples of places you can live in NYC and have a more suburban neighborhood thats safe and not break your back paying to live there.

Edited by kaylan
Posted
This doesnt invalidate what Ive been saying. They may travel in circles of people who are like them, but because of their requirements, these folk have a super small dating pool.

 

Considering how hard it is to find someone who fits you for a long term relationship or marriage, having only 5% of the population to date from doesnt sound like much fun...especially when these women have competition from women of many different social classes

 

Being an ethic minority that dates largely within my own ethnicity, I have even less than 5% to choose from. Yet, I get more dates from women within that tiny percent of the population than I do white women. I have also never dated anyone form that tiny population that made under $50k a year. If you calculate the raw odds of that, it would be tiny. However, we are not one large population. Rather we are a country of micro-populations. As such, I can pull off such a seemingly ridiculous feat quite easily. Lies, damn lies, and statistics my friend! I'm not saying your point is invalid, just providing some context as to why it may not be as difficult for some as it is for others.

Posted
My mom and dad raised us (my brother and I) on around 80k combined. Things were tight at times, but we lived a decent middle class upbringing.

 

In NYC it really depends on the boro, and then the neighborhood of the boro you live in, whether or not a certain amount of money is needed to raise a family well.

 

And In Chicago or NYC, 120k is def enough to live in a good suburban-ish area of the city and raise 2 kids. Staten Island and Queens are perfectly examples of places you can live in NYC and have a more suburban neighborhood thats safe and not break your back paying to live there.

 

80k is PLENTY in any borough cept Manhattan.

  • Like 1
Posted

Here in A-town, 70k is more than enough to survive (and thrive).

  • Like 1
Posted
Being an ethic minority that dates largely within my own ethnicity, I have even less than 5% to choose from. Yet, I get more dates from women within that tiny percent of the population than I do white women. I have also never dated anyone form that tiny population that made under $50k a year. If you calculate the raw odds of that, it would be tiny. However, we are not one large population. Rather we are a country of micro-populations. As such, I can pull off such a seemingly ridiculous feat quite easily. Lies, damn lies, and statistics my friend! I'm not saying your point is invalid, just providing some context as to why it may not be as difficult for some as it is for others.

Getting dates is easy. Finding the right person for you long term is much harder. My point is that expanding ones dating pool makes it easier to find this person and opens up loads of possibilities.

80k is PLENTY in any borough cept Manhattan.

Manhattan is ridiculous. The population density and proximity to entertainment and cultural areas isnt enough to offset the price. I cant stand how unnecessarily expensive it is. I plan to just live in Queens or Brooklyn but be close to the river that way Manhattan is super close when I want to go hang out.

Posted
Getting dates is easy. Finding the right person for you long term is much harder. My point is that expanding ones dating pool makes it easier to find this person and opens up loads of possibilities.

 

Manhattan is ridiculous. The population density and proximity to entertainment and cultural areas isnt enough to offset the price. I cant stand how unnecessarily expensive it is. I plan to just live in Queens or Brooklyn but be close to the river that way Manhattan is super close when I want to go hang out.

 

spookie would require her boyfriend to make a cool mil if she was in Manhattan.

Posted

I really don't understand the hostile vibe I'm picking up on here. I suspect that people are taking offense to her 120k figure, at which point I have to wonder about chips on shoulders. So that's what she has identified -- deal with it? It should be self-evident in a thread about preferences that they will differ among people. Also self-evident: everyone has a story about being raised while living in X on Y dollars, because people find ways to make it work -- that's not the question here. The question is about the lines to draw when finding a partner to start a family with, and whether money is/should be one of them, and how.

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