What are your earning potential requirements?

March 22, 2012

lol 2 bedroom apartments in downtown Vancouver don't cost $500,000 -- more like $400,000(with a pool, sauna, gym , etc)

unless you go for the luxurious ones. and 2 bedroom apartments near the train station a 15 minute ride to downtown go for about $300,000

March 22, 2012

My parents mortgage is 1000 a month. Small-ish house and I share a room with my brother. We only one car for many years and used coupons.

Sure, we didn't go to Disneyland every year (or ever) and I went to a commuter school instead of living on a college campus in order to save money. But, I think my childhood was pretty good.

Wow, you're lucky! My rent costs more than that! Actually, it's 50% more! LOL! I can't wait to move out of this area!

March 22, 2012

Wow, you're lucky! My rent costs more than that! Actually, it's 50% more! LOL! I can't wait to move out of this area!

I'm pretty sure luck has nothing to do with it.

March 22, 2012

Wow, you're lucky! My rent costs more than that! Actually, it's 50% more! LOL! I can't wait to move out of this area!

I should say THEY are lucky. Hate how they won't let you edit posts.

March 22, 2012

Wow, you're lucky! My rent costs more than that! Actually, it's 50% more! LOL! I can't wait to move out of this area!

That's what happens when you move into a home right before a huge mortgage bubble. They got the house for 115,000. Now, you can't touch anything in this area like it for less than twice that much.

March 22, 2012

That's what happens when you move into a home right before a huge mortgage bubble. They got the house for 115,000. Now, you can't touch anything in this area like it for less than twice that much.

Yeah, that's pretty much that I thought. Rents are range $1100-$1700 just for a basic one bedroom apartment nowadays. I can only imagine what mortgages are for a house now. At least $2k-$3k a month.

March 22, 2012

Im still not surprised. Its always funny how some of the women are who always saying money doesnt matter are always with men who are way more than well off.

I know myself and the other men here are not gonna be fooled to think your eyes didnt light up when you found out your bf's profession or income. You had to get a little excited about that. Lets be real.

That was my point. Not that you stay with a cheating loser just because hes broke.

With men here, you saying "id totally date a modest earning guy" wont mean much when youre currently dating a rich dude. People can say they will do anything, but at the end of the day, youre pretty well off...so thats what we see.

Just sayin'.

Not only are these guys very well off, but they're also very well off when compared to the women they are dating. These are the same women who talk about how all they care about is if the guy is a responsible spender/has enough to support himself.

I don't necessarily see that as a bad thing, but when 3 female LS posters in this thread alone are either married or in a very long term relationship with a guy that outearns them by a wide margin, their assertions ring hollow. Alright, you dated some low-to-average salary schmuck at some point in your life. It doesn't change the fact that you got hitched to someone who is not only very well off, but way better off than you as well.

Again, I don't find that to be terribly offensive by any means, but it's an insult to one's intelligence to pretend that the phenomenon of women gravitating towards men who outearn them doesn't exist. I experienced the difference in the way women treated me firsthand just being a law STUDENT, let alone a lawyer (which is comical in itself).

Edited March 22, 2012 by TheBigQuestion

March 22, 2012

In other words she wants to have her cake and eat it too. And you do subscribe to gender roles. The society we grew up in has molded you to find certain things attractive based on gender roles...hence why a man must provide for you even though you have a means to do so yourself. Hope your cake tastes good.

Good luck with that.
Im still not surprised. Its always funny how some of the women are who always saying money doesnt matter are always with men who are way more than well off.

I know myself and the other men here are not gonna be fooled to think your eyes didnt light up when you found out your bf's profession or income. You had to get a little excited about that. Lets be real.

That was my point. Not that you stay with a cheating loser just because hes broke.

With men here, you saying "id totally date a modest earning guy" wont mean much when youre currently dating a rich dude. People can say they will do anything, but at the end of the day, youre pretty well off...so thats what we see.

Just sayin'.

What about my posts during the duration of my three-year relationship with a low-income man that said income didn't matter much to me? I'm assuming those posts would be taken more seriously. I'm still the same person, so that doesn't make a whole lot of sense. I even made a post where I discussed my desire to marry said "low-earning" guy; I'm sure you can find it in my thread history.

Honestly at this point it's just coming across as bitter. My whole life I've dated pretty modestly-earning men, pulled my weight financially in relationships, and looked for the important intrinsic values in a partner over the material. I would still love my current boyfriend just as much as I do now if he made $150k less than he does. I met him at a bar, hung out with him all night, and gave him my number before having any idea what his profession was. And when I did find out, it actually gave me pause, because I assumed a doctor would be too busy to go out and have fun. And guess what? I still tried to pay for my own damn dinner.

If for some reason things don't work out between us, I'll continue to date the way I always have: by seeking out men I'm compatible with. If they end up being lower-middle class, fine. If they end up being wealthy, fine. It's not the be-all end-all to me and it never has been.

March 22, 2012

kiss_andmakeup said:

What about my posts during the duration of my three-year relationship with a low-income man that said income didn't matter much to me? I'm assuming those posts would be taken more seriously. I'm still the same person, so that doesn't make a whole lot of sense. I even made a post where I discussed my desire to marry said "low-earning" guy; I'm sure you can find it in my thread history.

Honestly at this point it's just coming across as bitter. My whole life I've dated pretty modestly-earning men, pulled my weight financially in relationships, and looked for the important intrinsic values in a partner over the material. I would still love my current boyfriend just as much as I do now if he made $150k less than he does. I met him at a bar, hung out with him all night, and gave him my number before having any idea what his profession was. And when I did find out, it actually gave me pause, because I assumed a doctor would be too busy to go out and have fun. And guess what? I still tried to pay for my own damn dinner.

If for some reason things don't work out between us, I'll continue to date the way I always have: by seeking out men I'm compatible with. If they end up being lower-middle class, fine. If they end up being wealthy, fine. It's not the be-all end-all to me and it never has been.

Youre still not understanding my point. Your opinion in this conversation means little to most guys because your situation only shows them that the rich guy got the girl. The details wont matter much...thats what Im saying.

Understand that. Accept that. Im not bitter about this at all. I personally dont care about what other people want in a relationship. I only care about what I want. I am simply telling you how your posts would come off to the average guy here. Im being objective. Its not about me...so dont throw the "bitter" character attack at me. Wont work.

If I was in a thread about women who werent exactly thin...and I said I dated a average or thick girl in the past...but am now dating a thin model bodied girl, plenty of the women wouldnt think much of my claims because at the end of the day look who I ended up with.

Get it now? Capiche? All I am saying is certain posts come off a certain way to the average male or female poster. In regards to this convo, I think more of the guys want to here from the women who are currently dating men with modest earnings.

March 22, 2012

Youre still not understanding my point. Your opinion in this conversation means little to most guys because your situation only shows them that the rich guy got the girl. The details wont matter much...thats what Im saying.

Sooo...because my opinion means little to "most guys," I shouldn't participate in the thread? I'm pretty sure the OP was a woman.

If I was in a thread about women who werent exactly thin...and I said I dated a average or thick girl in the past...but am now dating a thin model bodied girl, plenty of the women wouldnt think much of my claims because at the end of the day look who I ended up with.

Actually, I would think something of your claims. Especially if you didn't leave those women just 'cause they weren't "good enough," rather other incompatibilities arose (or, god forbid, you were cheated on). If you mentioned that you'd dated multiple heavier women in the past, but were with a thin and/or curvy woman now, I'd think that you just have a wide range when it comes to your weight preference, just as I do with income.

It's one thing to say, "I'd do ______, but never have," and another thing to say "I'd do ______, and have in the past." 3 out of the 4 men I've had relationships with since age 18 have been under 40k earners. I don't really think you speak for all men in saying that means "nothing."

I also don't get this whole "who you ended up with" thing. I'm not married to the guy. I'm not wanting to have his babies. We don't even live together. Who's to say I end up with him?

I tend to get a little ornery when the whole point of a thread is "Share your preferences on ______," someone shares theirs (or lack thereof), and then gets attacked or told that their opinion isn't valid, important, or legitimate. That's not really up to you to decide, unless it's your thread.

March 22, 2012

Sooo...because my opinion means little to "most guys," I shouldn't participate in the thread? I'm pretty sure the OP was a woman.

Did I say you shouldnt participate? No I did not.

You contributed to the thread. Then I replied. Its all discussion.

The OP is a woman, but obviously this thread garners the replies of men when it comes to women and a guys income. Hence my earlier comments.

Actually, I would think something of your claims. Especially if you didn't leave those women just 'cause they weren't "good enough," rather other incompatibilities arose (or, god forbid, you were cheated on). If you mentioned that you'd dated multiple heavier women in the past, but were with a thin and/or curvy woman now, I'd think that you just have a wide range when it comes to your weight preference, just as I do with income.

Ok...you may think this...but for the men who are looked down upon for their income, and for the women who are looked down upon for their weight, these two groups of people will have different thoughts on the matter.

Luckily you are a thin female so you dont have to worry about either issue. I simply provided the reasoning men and women would give in those situations based upon what I always see on this forum and in real life.

It's one thing to say, "I'd do ______, but never have," and another thing to say "I'd do ______, and have in the past." 3 out of the 4 men I've had relationships with since age 18 have been under 40k earners. I don't really think you speak for all men in saying that means "nothing."

Did I say I speak for all men? Stop putting words in my mouth. I simply said for many men, your opinion will be overlooked. That is fact. We see the genders overlook certain arguments on this forum all the time because a posters current situation in a way contradicts the statements they just made...thats just how it is.

I also don't get this whole "who you ended up with" thing. I'm not married to the guy. I'm not wanting to have his babies. We don't even live together. Who's to say I end up with him?

For the time being you ended up with him....happy now? Is that rewording better for you? Dont whine about semantics.

I tend to get a little ornery when the whole point of a thread is "Share your preferences on ______," someone shares theirs (or lack thereof), and then gets attacked or told that their opinion isn't valid, important, or legitimate. That's not really up to you to decide, unless it's your thread.

You brought an opinion. Then I brought an opinion. Not everyones gonna agree with you...if that upsets you...oh well...thats life.

You have to realize that OP comes off pretty entitled from a mans point of view...so when you jump into the ring talking about your rich current boyfriend...a lot of guys here will see that as another tally in OPs column and a strike against modest dudes....despite the circumstances and details.

Im just giving you the honest reality of how I see people behave and react here.

March 23, 2012

When I was still single, telling girls that I was going to law school frequently made their eyes light up. I was well-informed enough to know the reasons they had for their heightened interests were gross exaggerations, but I was savvy enough to not try and correct em, if ya catch my drift.

Well, law has a bimodal salary distribution. You have a big chunk of lawyers making bank at V100 and boutique firms, and a big chunk making peanuts at a vast array of ****law firms, without too many in "mid law."

There are plenty of law students who will earn, at graduation, 160K+ with bonuses (which at the truly elite firms can reach up to 100% of base salary in a good year). This makes law potentially the most lucrative profession for new graduates (especially given the relatively minimal time investment).

However, this sort of outcome is only a reasonable possibility for about 50-60% of students at top 10 law schools. Everyone else is taking a huge gamble, frankly.

March 23, 2012

Oh and now you accuse me of being a troll because I call foul when I see it.

I'm sure with your feminist posts you have unbanned and banned names littered all over this site.

I call 'em as I see 'em. Yup, troll.

I have just this one name. I have no need to litter the site with fake personas and incite and stir up nonsense. You must lead a pretty boring life.

March 23, 2012

Did I say I speak for all men? Stop putting words in my mouth. I simply said for many men, your opinion will be overlooked.

Okay, you said "most men." Don't whine about semantics.

Funny how "most" men are presumed to feel the same way you do, but you're the only one who felt the need to call me out and throw a snarky "LOL" at my honest response to the OP. Even on this forum, where the guys jump at any chance to call a woman a gold-digger, you were the only one who felt the need to fling poo at me.

I think I understand your viewpoint, and I absolutely understand where you're coming from. But the way you presented it was snarky and sarcastic, which makes it hard to be sympathetic to.

March 23, 2012

Okay, you said "most men." Don't whine about semantics.

Does most = all? Either way Im pretty sure I know what men think. Seeing as I am a man and spend most of my time with other modest wage men. Whatevs.

Funny how "most" men are presumed to feel the same way you do, but you're the only one who felt the need to call me out and throw a snarky "LOL" at my honest response to the OP. Even on this forum, where the guys jump at any chance to call a woman a gold-digger, you were the only one who felt the need to fling poo at me.

Look, if you cant handle a difference in opinion...then what can i tell you? I never called you a gold digger. I simply stated that to a lot of guys, your current situation would appear rather convenient and they would more value the opinion of a woman whos currently dating a modest wage guy.

Im black...and if I wanted to ask women about interracial dating, Id rather here from woman who are currently in nice relationships with different race guys, then with women who had failed relationships with one a while ago.

I dont think I flung poo. I simply posted what I was actually thinking and feeling when I read your post. I in fact chuckled and thought "how convenient?". I even ran it by my boys as I looked into my phone. They felt the same way. It is what it is. When it comes to this situation you do know a lot of men will have a particular view.

I think I understand your viewpoint, and I absolutely understand where you're coming from. But the way you presented it was snarky and sarcastic, which makes it hard to be sympathetic to.

Ok my bad I guess. But look...kay is a honest guy. Im gonna present my opinion the way it comes into my mind...if it makes you dislike me cool...if it makes others like me cool. Im not concerned with others emotions towards me. Im concerned with contributing honest opinion to this forum.

If a simple "Lol" is enough to get people riled up on the internet...then I dunno what to say.

Edited March 23, 2012 by kaylan

March 23, 2012

Income has never been a criterion for me. All I require is that he be able to support himself. I want real love, faithfulness, commitment, and a wonderful life together. All this is far more important to me than material things.

March 23, 2012

Northbrook, lake bluff.

Also keep in mind Chicago and some I it's burbs are extremely violent. For example 46 people were shot , 10 to death last weekend.

How predictable spookie. No surprise you'd give me two of the highest income suburbs in Chicago. Wrong person to try to pull this on.

March 23, 2012

Im still not surprised. Its always funny how some of the women are who always saying money doesnt matter are always with men who are way more than well off.

Perhaps it's because many men who are well off prefer women who truly don't give two figs about their money. *shrugs*

March 23, 2012

Perhaps it's because many men who are well off prefer women who truly don't give two figs about their money. *shrugs*

Too bad a lot of them end up with chicks who use em as banks. I still stand by what I said...but Ill agree that the women who dont care about money get my thumbs up

Those women > women like OP.

true story.

March 23, 2012

I've haven't really thought about it too much.

Probably enough so that the two of us could pull in around $120 to 150K a year.

That would be ideal.

But I'd definitely date someone who made less than ideal if she had other qualities.

March 23, 2012

I wonder why women are a lot less admitting toward what they really want?

I mean most men are not afraid to acknowledge that they wish to have plenty of hot women even if they get called pigs, etc.

On the other hand we all know that what women really want is to marry a rich man. They want money. However, unlike men, women are a lot less open about this preference of theirs. They tend to prefer to hide behind 'desire for security' which is a pathetic excuse in itself.

March 23, 2012

Perhaps it's because many men who are well off prefer women who truly don't give two figs about their money. *shrugs*

This is a good point also.

My boyfriend and I had been dating for a couple months before we talked a bit about dating history and he asked me if I had ever dated anyone in the medical field before. I told him I had gone on a few dates with a radiation oncologist (true story, BTW), but broke things off with him when I decided to be exclusive with my ex, whom I felt more compatible with. He asked what my ex did, and I told him the truth...he was a cook.

I could tell that this, combined with the fact that I still to this day try to split the dinner checks with him despite his never letting me, really made an impression on him. Rather than frown on me for having dated a "lower class" guy, he saw the positive: that I'm definitely not in relationships for monetary gain. I think that strengthened his feelings and trust in me.

March 23, 2012

How predictable spookie. No surprise you'd give me two of the highest income suburbs in Chicago. Wrong person to try to pull this on.

every one of those crimes occured in the ghetto not those highest income suburbs. spookie aint fooling anyone.

March 23, 2012

How predictable spookie. No surprise you'd give me two of the highest income suburbs in Chicago.

Spookie, are you aware of any more moderately priced Chicago burbs that are safe?

It seems that there is no middle ground in your mind. I am sure thousands of middle class families live and raise happy kids in the Chicago area outside of the very wealthiest suburbs.

March 23, 2012

Spookie, are you aware of any more moderately priced Chicago burbs that are safe?

It seems that there is no middle ground in your mind. I am sure thousands of middle class families live and raise happy kids in the Chicago area outside of the very wealthiest suburbs.

Hubby's best friend from HS lives in Chicago now and has a 4 year old girl. I'd have to look up the name of the place they live, but they're not rich -- his best friend is a science teacher and the wife is a cop (a detective, I think, so she might make okay-ish money for a cop, but still).

Chicago never struck me as expensive as NYC or San Fran. More pricey than where I live, but not the priciest. I'm curious how it falls on the national average -- it's only 14% greater. (Where I live is at national average -- well, 1% below.) Of course, statistics can't show everything. Perhaps there's a greater divide in Chi-Town than other cities. I've been a few times, and mostly all I can say is great improv and pretty decent food.

Edited March 23, 2012 by zengirl

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