KathyM Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 but the ideal world does not exist. the fact is women want sex just as much as men do, they just don't admit to it because of the stigma that western society places on women having sex to begin with. these situations play out on this forum just as they do in real life, if you take people at their word. young inexperienced men who do what Kathy suggests wind up alone and frustrated. men who ignore what Kathy suggests and pursue women sexually have no trouble whatsoever getting sex, albeit just as much trouble finding relationships. so all this tells us is that the single world is full of people who are not relationship material. but we knew that, that's why those people are single all of the time. but the fact is there's no trophy for those men who fail to get any form of female companionship due to the poor advice they got about chasing a relationship and not getting sex from women they do get dates with. no one cares. even women who recommend such behavior to those men don't want that, they just say they do because it sounds good to them due to their own personal situation for whatever reason, and fits with that western society stereotype of women, regardless of how untrue that stereotype is. so much better advice for those men is to pursue sex when they want to and they'll probably get it a lot more often, and stop trying to behave like they have been told that women behave. because if women wanted women they'd all go gay, they wouldn't need men. So my suggestion that men not use women by paying for sex or lying to them is bad advice on my part? So suggesting they seek out a real relationship and not use "practice girls" is bad advice on my part? To each his own, I guess. If a guy is going to feel good about himself for using women, then he has a lot more problems than his sexual inexperience. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 So my suggestion that men not use women by paying for sex or lying to them is bad advice on my part? So suggesting they seek out a real relationship and not use "practice girls" is bad advice on my part? To each his own, I guess. If a guy is going to feel good about himself for using women, then he has a lot more problems than his sexual inexperience. Honestly, this thread has pretty much convinced me that a practice girl is necessary. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ThaWholigan Posted March 22, 2012 Author Share Posted March 22, 2012 to take it a bit further, i know more than a few women who were effectively raped by "good christian" men. not that they could be proven in court, but still...("oh i can let him come back to my place, he's a 'good christian', he won't do anything inappropriate") enough that a pattern can be drawn from it. the pattern being self righteousness and sexual frustration are NOT good traits to mix up in a person. the bottom line is the western conservative ideal of putting sex on a pedestal is dying a slow painful death as the generations go by. but it isn't going quietly, it's kicking and screaming. the result we see is that sexually confident people tend to find happiness and companionship at a higher rate than people who subscribe to the sexual apprehension of the past. there's an ebb and flow of people who don't find happiness trying to go back and forth between camps, but by and large religious conservatism is dying, and people who believe in that lifestyle aren't happy about it. and speaking of drawing patterns, i would argue that the percentage of young inexperienced men on this forum who spout the stereotypical conservative political propaganda when those topics come up is awfully high, and that is not a coincidence. they've bought hook, line, and sinker into a set of ideals that for the most part, no longer exist. yet they wonder why women don't want to be around an angsty, delusional, self righteous, inexperienced person...hello? I think there is some truth to this, I don't think it's common but still something to consider.... you don't strike me as the guilt-ridden religious type Haha, I was born Rasta, and became a born-again Christian at 10, but I gave all that up. I still believe in God but I just don't do religion anymore. My spiritual growth is currently residing in my study of metaphysics and the like. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ThaWholigan Posted March 22, 2012 Author Share Posted March 22, 2012 So my suggestion that men not use women by paying for sex or lying to them is bad advice on my part? So suggesting they seek out a real relationship and not use "practice girls" is bad advice on my part? To each his own, I guess. If a guy is going to feel good about himself for using women, then he has a lot more problems than his sexual inexperience. I don't think using women is the way forward, no. I don't think a "practice girl" is good advice, but I think that what that_one is saying is that appearing as relationship material and not expressing oneself as a sexually attractive man from early is what is stopping a lot of sexually inexperienced men from becoming desirable. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ThaWholigan Posted March 22, 2012 Author Share Posted March 22, 2012 Honestly, this thread has pretty much convinced me that a practice girl is necessary. The very nature of having a "practice girl" is crude when you emphasize it in all honesty. I made the thread and even when I did, I wasn't convinced. Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 Honestly, this thread has pretty much convinced me that a practice girl is necessary. Don't lower yourself, Somedude. Work on finding a real relationship with someone who would want you, not someone you have to pay or lie to. Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 I don't think using women is the way forward, no. I don't think a "practice girl" is good advice, but I think that what that_one is saying is that appearing as relationship material and not expressing oneself as a sexually attractive man from early is what is stopping a lot of sexually inexperienced men from becoming desirable. Well, my advice to Somedude was to present himself as someone charming, romantic, and flirtatious, and that has a lot greater chance of sparking an interest in a woman than acting like her friend and then trying to climb out of the friendzone. And you, dear Wholigan, tend to talk out of both sides of your mouth. (No offense). 1 Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 The very nature of having a "practice girl" is crude when you emphasize it in all honesty. I made the thread and even when I did, I wasn't convinced. I think you and I saw practice girl as different things. In my mind, it means going after somebody I'm not interested in at all in hopes to get some sexual experience. Then after a while, try to get with somebody I actually want and I'll have a better chance than before I started, practicing. Yeah, it's a horrible thing to do to the first girl, but is there another way to start getting experience? Now I'm wondering how to actually convince a girl that you are not into, that you are? How do you fake sexual interest? Or would I have to lie to myself first? Link to post Share on other sites
verhrzn Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 I think you and I saw practice girl as different things. In my mind, it means going after somebody I'm not interested in at all in hopes to get some sexual experience. Then after a while, try to get with somebody I actually want and I'll have a better chance than before I started, practicing. Yeah, it's a horrible thing to do to the first girl, but is there another way to start getting experience? Now I'm wondering how to actually convince a girl that you are not into, that you are? How do you fake sexual interest? Or would I have to lie to myself first? You go for the girl you're actually interested in. Then you get both; experience AND the girl you like, without destroying another human being's sense of worth. The idea of the "practice girl" is so insulting and vile. I said it a few posts back, but when I discover I've been used like this, I have to fight every instinct not to turn the guy's social circle into a deep crater. Not a lot of women are going to flock to you when they discover you routinely use girls for your own selfish purposes, sexual experience or not. Link to post Share on other sites
Dust Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 I think you and I saw practice girl as different things. In my mind, it means going after somebody I'm not interested in at all in hopes to get some sexual experience. Then after a while, try to get with somebody I actually want and I'll have a better chance than before I started, practicing. Yeah, it's a horrible thing to do to the first girl, but is there another way to start getting experience? Now I'm wondering how to actually convince a girl that you are not into, that you are? How do you fake sexual interest? Or would I have to lie to myself first? You should get a practice girl somedude! Somedude don't read below this line and in the parenthesis************* (This is just nature taking its course, he needs to tell himself something to lower his standards. Him calling a girl a practice girl isn't the same as if other guys did it. He'll fall in love with his PRACTICE girl.) Link to post Share on other sites
Author ThaWholigan Posted March 22, 2012 Author Share Posted March 22, 2012 Well, my advice to Somedude was to present himself as someone charming, romantic, and flirtatious, and that has a lot greater chance of sparking an interest in a woman than acting like her friend and then trying to climb out of the friendzone. And you, dear Wholigan, tend to talk out of both sides of your mouth. (No offense). It's a gift and a curse . Being able to entertain both sides of an argument. I do tend to play devils advocate for my own enjoyment at times, I admit. The truth of the matter is that there are parts of people's POV that resonate with me, and equates to one whole picture as far as I see it. Whereas you are coming at it from the POV of being a man of true character and being charming and romantic, many women may differ on what they find charming and romantic and that is where the viewpoints of someone like that_one or Emilia comes in. I understand fully well that this can come across as wishy-washy, but I honestly don't care, I obviously have been given this particular gifts among the many blessings I have been fortunate to receive for a reason. No offense taken though I think you and I saw practice girl as different things. In my mind, it means going after somebody I'm not interested in at all in hopes to get some sexual experience. Then after a while, try to get with somebody I actually want and I'll have a better chance than before I started, practicing. Yeah, it's a horrible thing to do to the first girl, but is there another way to start getting experience? Now I'm wondering how to actually convince a girl that you are not into, that you are? How do you fake sexual interest? Or would I have to lie to myself first? This is bad, mate. I didn't say anything about lying . We all agree that it's unethical. Don't have sex with someone you don't actually want to have sex with, it's a really bad idea. Link to post Share on other sites
dasein Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 The only legitimate "practice girls" come with air compressors. Link to post Share on other sites
missyme04 Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 Honestly, this thread has pretty much convinced me that a practice girl is necessary. NECESSARY?!!!! wt... !! eeee. I hate to say this but that's so rude Link to post Share on other sites
Author ThaWholigan Posted March 22, 2012 Author Share Posted March 22, 2012 NECESSARY?!!!! wt... !! eeee. I hate to say this but that's so rude Don't be too harsh, he feels it's necessary because he believed he can't get a girl at all. Desperation makes a man do funny things...... Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 Desperation makes a man do funny things...... Hey.....that sounds familiar. He'll fall in love with his PRACTICE girl.) Sorry, I read below the line. That actually has a good chance of happening. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
missyme04 Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 Don't be too harsh, he feels it's necessary because he believed he can't get a girl at all. Desperation makes a man do funny things...... Is he also a V? hmmmmmmmm. It's really hard! I think the best is to ask advice not to practice. hehehe. Ask advice on same sex Link to post Share on other sites
Dust Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 Don't be too harsh, he feels it's necessary because he believed he can't get a girl at all. Desperation makes a man do funny things...... Heres the thing I don't like the way you worded it but you're onto something. You don't have to see mariage when you date a girl. In fact dating a girl not talking about mariage or getting engaged for years is the norm. No on thinks just because you had sex you're engaged. Yes theres the fact the most people want a one on one relationship. You can break it off at any time. Some times I think guys who have problems are to serious there for missing out on girls who would have been a great part of their life, if not the one! In somedudes case I supose "practice" girl is his weird way of lowering his standards. Gaurantee he would never dump the girl. Really the only practice for getting girls you are into is going after girls you are into. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ThaWholigan Posted March 22, 2012 Author Share Posted March 22, 2012 Is he also a V? hmmmmmmmm. It's really hard! I think the best is to ask advice not to practice. hehehe. Ask advice on same sex Same sex? You mean like becoming a homosexual? Wouldn't advise that either.... Asking advice can work, but I suppose that there are mechanics of social intelligence that need discussing. Being autistic really brought home the value of being able to socialize effectively. I'm pretty good at it now, but still need to push on with regards to dating now. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 Is he also a V? hmmmmmmmm. No I'm not. It's really hard!That's what she said 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ThaWholigan Posted March 22, 2012 Author Share Posted March 22, 2012 Heres the thing I don't like the way you worded it but you're onto something. You don't have to see mariage when you date a girl. In fact dating a girl not talking about mariage or getting engaged for years is the norm. No on thinks just because you had sex you're engaged. Yes theres the fact the most people want a one on one relationship. You can break it off at any time. Some times I think guys who have problems are to serious there for missing out on girls who would have been a great part of their life, if not the one! In somedudes case I supose "practice" girl is his weird way of lowering his standards. Gaurantee he would never dump the girl. Really the only practice for getting girls you are into is going after girls you are into. Yeah. I wouldn't go for a girl I wasn't into. And I did say earlier in the thread that guys who have problems dating are taking it way too seriously. Link to post Share on other sites
missyme04 Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 Same sex? You mean like becoming a homosexual? Wouldn't advise that either.... Asking advice can work, but I suppose that there are mechanics of social intelligence that need discussing. Being autistic really brought home the value of being able to socialize effectively. I'm pretty good at it now, but still need to push on with regards to dating now. LOL! I dont mean homo. hahahaha. I mean ADVICE from same sex. hehe ) If he really wants someone, go for it! sex will just come in the right time and girls who just want sex doesn't need serious guys either Link to post Share on other sites
Author ThaWholigan Posted March 22, 2012 Author Share Posted March 22, 2012 LOL! I dont mean homo. hahahaha. I mean ADVICE from same sex. hehe ) If he really wants someone, go for it! sex will just come in the right time and girls who just want sex doesn't need serious guys either misunderstood that one there Yeah, needs to loosen up a little. Hey, we all do really and truly 1 Link to post Share on other sites
missyme04 Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 misunderstood that one there Yeah, needs to loosen up a little. Hey, we all do really and truly It's ok. Sometimes we really misunderstood things, ME TOO weeeeeeeeeeee. hope he gets the girl for her. You can do it! Link to post Share on other sites
Jeremy87 Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 ... then he is probably not inexperienced sexually (apologies OP and I know your reasons are different from most) You nailed it. Link to post Share on other sites
Jeremy87 Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 There are plenty of men who are sexually inexperienced who ARE quality guys. Some may be inexperienced because they have been focused on getting an education, or starting a business, and haven't really devoted the time to meeting women. Some may be shy with women, but have a lot going for them and just need encouragement to come out of their shell. Some may have standards and want to have sex only with women who they can see a future with or who they love, and are not the type to engage in a lot of ONS or casual relationships. Some are men of faith who hold themselves to a higher standard of behavior. I know a man (the son of a friend of mine) who is inexperienced, celebate, and getting married soon to a woman who has multiple college degrees, multiple talents, high intelligence, attractive and a genuinely nice, caring person. There are many reasons why a quality man might be inexperienced, and many women who would not hold that against a guy. Some would even prefer that he not be the type that has slept around a lot. PLENTY as in how many, ONE per STATE. LOL a man who's inexperenced is a religious absolutist, homosexual, or in most cases HE CAN'T GET ANY CUSE HE DOESN'T HAVE TRAITS WOMEN WANT. One of these traits is to have skills in bed. Link to post Share on other sites
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