futuredentist Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 (edited) [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3]This is long, so I thank the people who actuallyread this and give me some good advice.. Here is my relationship story…[/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3]My boyfriend is amazing. Very mellow, yet outgoing.But I have been for the last month off and on wondering if this relationshipwill really work. Here is why..[/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] PROS 1. Smart- he is very intelligent [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 2. Respectful- towards everyone [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 3. Gentlemen- opens car door for me95% of the time [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 4. Funny- makes me laugh [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 5. Attractive- He is a cutie andwith a tan whewwwww HOT [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 6. Overall Good Person- pretty goodmorals, good head on his shoulders [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 7. 90% Considerate [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 8. Parents are nice [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 9. Good job- good pay [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 10. Going to school- to excel in thecareer field he is in [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 11. Sex is good- nice package, notlazy, adventurous [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 12. Tries to cook- he doesn’t cookanything on the stove, yet he’s been doing it lately because he knows I don’tlike men who only cook on the grill [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 13. Clean- hygiene [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 14. Assertive- has a back bone, we actuallyequal out in dominance thank god. So sick of being with a man who can’t stickup for himself or do things on his own [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 15. Things in Common [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 16. Affectionate- most affectionateperson I have been with- love it [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 17. Doesn't Believe in POLITICSwoohooo [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 18. No Children [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 19. No Criminal History [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 20. Communication- when it comes todisagreements or how we feel [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 21. Dresses nice [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 22. Doesn't have a sailors mouth [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 23. Sociable [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 24. Good Relationship with family [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 25. In to Holidays [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 26. Has dreams/goals [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 27. Positive/good attitude- supportsme a lot through rough times with school and he puts up with my ****(especially during PMS- very lucky to have him) [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 28. Not selfish [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 29. Somewhat romantic [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 30. Somewhat Spontaneous [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 31. Somewhat creative [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] CONS [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 1. Don't know if I can trust him- Ijust started checking his phone 2 weeks ago because a dilemma that happenedregarding a possible STD. The STD scenario is down below past the CONS. [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] ---He’stoo nice to people. I mean he has a “girl friend” at work that he treats tolunch all the time. He’s not even her boss. He feels bad because she gets paid$6 less than him and she does things for him at work. She’s married to theopposite race w/children but he calls her his “other wife” because he loves her(as a friend), she has a great personality, but opposite race of my bf. My bfis also friends with her husband but heremy bf is trying to save money and he’s paying for her lunch once or twice aweek. Why can’t her husband give her lunch money. Her husband has a good job. [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] *----Alsohe told me he went to some work happy hour thing and gave some waitress hiscard because he remembered seeing her in high school and he felt bad she wasbeing his waitress and here he was in a suit. I actually think they have beentalking. (Scenario regarding possible cheating and STD situation down below) Ican’t remember if he told me it was Ruby Tuesday’s or Chili’s where thishappened. [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] -Healso is friends with this girl he had friends with benefits with. They werereally good friends for 7 years off and on. Supposedly only had sex 2x (yeahfricken right) and spent the night at each other’s house a lot. In the beginninghe told me they were in a relationship but then after questioning him about itthey were only friends. He did admit he absolutely loved her. He still talks toher but she lives in a different state. What happened is he loved her and sheended up choosing his best friend over him. She then cheated on his best friendwith him and then ended back up with his best friend and they married. She thengot divorced and remarried someone else. Who the hell is friends with someonelike that. I noticed my bf’s mom and sister is friends with her too. Totally donot agree with the situation and I don’t know if just this, will make or breakour relationship because I feel SO Strongly about men not being able to befriends with woman. I know for a fact if the girl moves back to the area, therewill be absolutely NO trust. [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] ----Hetold me (we were drinking so I don’t remember) about some girl, forget whatmost of the conversation was about, but he said “I’m a guy of course I’d wanthave sex with her” and the girl is on his facebook (she’s not even pretty) [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] ----Ona random night we decided to go to a strip club and he said “It’s funny, Iusually or my type of woman are petite but a little more hips like thesestrippers, yet I’m so fascinated with your body” So I’m like what? So yeah, allhis previous girlfriends are I guess petite and here I am with some meat. Imean I’m thin, I look damn good in a bikini, I have some muscle tone, but thattotally made me feel like ****. Found out she was single but 15 years olderthan him. [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] ----Isaw a text from a coworker of his saying how she loved him for all his help andasked if he wanted to go to happy hour with her like last week. This was acouple months back the text was dated. [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] -Supposedlyhe’s only slept with 8 people. How quick he got a hard on, when we first kissedon our first date makes me hardly believe that. We didn’t have sex, we partedways after we kissed but he got a hard on and was a little embarrassed. We didn’thave sex till 3/4/5wks after meeting and dating [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] ----He told me once he let a stripper give him a blow job, that he use to go tostrip clubs for a drink after work by himself.. and I’m just like, I think Ican do better than this guy. He has kinda ****ty morals and values but hetreats me good other than that. Very communicative and honest. [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 2. Unhealthy Eater- He eats so crappy,I’m a health fanatic and love working out [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 3. Not that active- he likes to belazy when he gets home. I like to go to the park. [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 4. Smokes [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 5. Started me smoking [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 6. Constant drinker meaning a glassor two of wine a night [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 7. 90% doesn't clean or pick upafter himself - the trash and laundry basket is RIGHT THERE [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 8. 95% doesn't do laundry [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 9. Babied by mother, and supposedlyexpects me to do the same just because he leaves his **** everywhere like hedoes to his mom [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 10. Friends w/exes (SO NOT OKAY WITHTHIS)- Already explained in #1 [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 11. Doesn't have his **** together(house being sold, moving back in with mom for 6 months then finding his ownplace again with me once money is saved) [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 12. Teeth (needs to go to the damndentist and get a check up- I'm going to be a dentist- hell fricken lo) [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 13. Height (can't wear my awesomeheels) [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 14. Too nice of a guy (gives womanwrong impressions because he's too nice, I mean I’d get the wrong impression ifhe gave me his business card) [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 15. Aggressive when driving (yellingout the window or doing stupid **** when one makes a mistake on the roaddriving) [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 16. Sometimes I don't like theperson I have become - mostly when I smoke is when I feel this [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 17. Likes Strip Clubs/has messed aroundwith a stripper once [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 18. Communication- I always tell himwhat I am doing all day. He doesn’t tell me what he does. Doesn’t tell me as inwhere he goes to lunch or who he’s going with, yet when I bring a bag home fromsomewhere I went he’s like “oh you didn’t tell me you were going there” welpyou don’t tell me where you’re going during the day or errands you do, or lunchdates you have. [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 19. Not open about how his day wentor stress he's going through [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 20. Can't do cats [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 21. Not very religious [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 22. Doesn't care that drinking,smoking, not eating right, not working out is really bad for you [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] 23. Procrastinator [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] I know no one is perfect. But latelyI don’t know what to think, don’t know if I’m just being a nit picker, maybebecause I am PMSing could be part of it. I mean I am a total bitch when I’m onbirthcontrol and PMSing. I’ve had to change birthcontrols like 5 times becausethey all effect me in different ways that I can’t stand or my bf hates orprevious bf’s hate. When I’m off birthcontrol I am totally sane. [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3]So here’s the Scenerio from above…. 2 weeks ago aflesh colored bump arose on his penis head. He thought that he had cut himselfsomehow. Then last Monday a bunch of smaller flesh colored bumps arose. AND hegoes and pops the first one that arose 2 weeks ago. He thought it was aningrown hair or pimple or something. He thinks these bumps are from the newlaundry detergent I used 3/4 weeks ago and again this past weekend (when moreof the bumps arose) or it could be from dry sex or new KY. What do I believe??I don't know. He doesn't have the time to cheat with a demanding fulltime joband part time classes at school. I DON'T cheat; neither have I EVER had an STDof some sort. I have always been healthy and clean, so I don't know what to door think. He went for an STD test last week (urine sample) and the doctorlooked at his penis and said it's nothing. The test results came back yesterdayas negative. The doctor also said we can't have sex until the bumps heal, butto take his sex advice with a grain of salt. It still freaks me out though. Idon't know how to support him, how did he get these bumps that he never hadbefore? We've had dry sex before, and if it was laundry detergent why arn't thebumps other places? I beleive we've used the KY before as well. I trust him butwhen it comes to something like this, it gives me second thoughts. We've talkedabout our future together and started looking at places to move into togetherso, I don't know. What do I do? On another note, here I'm the one freaking out about it and he is totally calm,not stressed.. Maybe it is trust issues??? I mean I had an STD scare a longtime ago (it ended up being an ingrown hair lol) and I was freaking out likecrazy. Why wasn't he freaking out? Anyone would freak out if they were diseasefree and something shows up like that right? [/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3]One more thing on top of it all. Here comes thesuspicion part of cheating. My boyfriend is a SUPER nice guy, too nice, but isassertive as well. When his first bump arose I felt suspicious. I have neverlooked into his phone, I never wanted to, never wanted to start that crap, Irespect his privacy, until that day. I looked in his phone and noticed somegirl... Lets call her Jane, he had send her a text saying something about"How are things going, sorry it took me so long to get back to you"Her name logged into his phone was Jane(Ruby Tueday's). Okay first off, youhave to put where you met the person in your phone so you can remember who theyare. So, I deleted the number out of his phone and I think I might of deletedthe text message. Welp, I look in his phone after he had showed me more of theflesh colored bumps that had risen a day or two after, and her name is back inhis phone. I tried to delete it again and accidently called the number. Ihurried and hung up, deleted the number but didn't know how to delete the call.So then I deleted all of his call history and all of his text messages becauseI got scared he would find out somehow. Ofcoarse he wondered how that happenedbut didn't accuse me. I know from experience men and woman can't be friends. Ihave mail friends that I've had sex with before that are "myfriends". I have male friends that I haven't had sex with that I wouldjust like as friends and they want more. Men and woman can't be friends. Itmakes me want to check his phone again in a couple days to see if the girl isback into his phone. I HATE THIS! This is why I never ever want to look ordisrespect someones privacy because once you find something your suspicions ofit turns to an addiction to find out the truth or the things your loved oneisn't telling you. So it's like what do I do with all of this? [/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3][/sIZE][/FONT] Edited March 21, 2012 by futuredentist showing font stuff because I copied and pasted from word
Emilia Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 You will have to repost it so it's legible. No-one will read it fully as it is.
TaraMaiden Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 illegible. completely illegible and far too much like hard work to try to get through it. sorry hun, but you're going to have to try again.....
dasein Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 Don't paste from word processors into the forums, try "paste special unformatted text." And NBD, everyone makes that mistake at least once.
Author futuredentist Posted March 21, 2012 Author Posted March 21, 2012 I know.. Wouldn't let me re copy and paste...
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