Goldie5 Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 For the probably 10 days, my boyfriend has been over the top affectionate and sappy. He has always been sweet but pretty mild. Lately, he has been overly affectionate when we hang out -- constantly wanting to cuddle and touch me. It's almost suffocating me. He has also been calling a lot more as well as sending way more sappy texts. Just saying things like "I'm so lucky you're my girlfriend" and "you are seriously everything I have ever wanted." ..etc. Which, don't get me wrong, is very sweet but are things he only says every once in awhile (which is fine, I don't need constant affirmation). He is normally pretty attentive to my needs, but even more so lately. Lately he has been going above and beyond to do things without my even asking or hinting. This is all good and great, and I want to appreciate it and just it enjoy it all. But for some reason, I have a gut feeling something isn't right. I never ever ever ever ever have doubted my boyfriend before. But this over the top stuff is making me feel uneasy for some reason and I can't shake the feeling. I have read before that if a guy feels guilty, he will be extra attentive towards his significant other. Let me add here that I was cheated on by my last boyfriend ..it came out of nowhere and I was in complete shock. So while I have moved on from it, I am much more careful now and still have a bit of a trust issue. So I'm wondering if that is what is causing this feeling. If I'm just letting anxiety take over. I've always heard to trust your gut when something doesn't seem right but how do I know if it's just my own anxiety getting worked up over nothing? My boyfriend hasn't done anything else to make me think he's being unfaithful in the slightest. I just don't know what all this over the top behavior is about. The only other thing I can think of is that I have been hit on by a few guys recently when out ...maybe he feels threatened or is going the extra mile to show me what we have together? I don't know. Maybe I'm just crazy, people. I'm beginning to feel like it. I'd like your honest feedback, even if it's just to tell me to get my dang head on straight.
Philosoraptor Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 Maybe he's worried that you're feeling differently about him? Maybe he has a lot of stress going on or had an experience that he did not express, but is bothering him. On the negative side this is also something that happens with someone whom is going back and forth in their head when deciding whether or not to end a relationship. It's the reason you see so many stories of people discussing marriage and kids the day before the relationship ended.
FitChick Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 It could be he has been looking around and maybe even dated a few women and then realized you are much better than they are. Hard to say. Do you know a good psychic? Seriously. In the past they have saved me a lot of time and trouble by seeing the bigger picture. 1
silvermercy Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 Go with your gut feeling. And try discussing it with him. Don't say you suspect him of cheating just yet. This can backfire if you don't have solid evidence. But regardless, if there was any wrong-doing on his part, he'd deny it anyway. Of course, there could be more innocent reasons like him being more insecure about you or reading about how he can be a sweeter and better boyfriend. But yeah, don't confront about anything serious unless you have solid proof. Just voice your concerns for now.
Author Goldie5 Posted March 21, 2012 Author Posted March 21, 2012 Maybe he's worried that you're feeling differently about him? Maybe he has a lot of stress going on or had an experience that he did not express, but is bothering him. On the negative side this is also something that happens with someone whom is going back and forth in their head when deciding whether or not to end a relationship. It's the reason you see so many stories of people discussing marriage and kids the day before the relationship ended. If he is going back and forth, he has hidden it very well. We have a fun, healthy relationship 98% of the time and he gets very concerned if I'm upset about something in our relationship.
Author Goldie5 Posted March 21, 2012 Author Posted March 21, 2012 Go with your gut feeling. And try discussing it with him. Don't say you suspect him of cheating just yet. This can backfire if you don't have solid evidence. But regardless, if there was any wrong-doing on his part, he'd deny it anyway. Of course, there could be more innocent reasons like him being more insecure about you or reading about how he can be a sweeter and better boyfriend. But yeah, don't confront about anything serious unless you have solid proof. Just voice your concerns for now. How do I go about this without sounding like I'm accusing him? That can break a relationship.
Philosoraptor Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 If he is going back and forth, he has hidden it very well. We have a fun, healthy relationship 98% of the time and he gets very concerned if I'm upset about something in our relationship. Well I certainly hope he isn't, but it's a possibility. It's the reason that they put so much effort into things when they are with their partner. It's a way of coping with the thoughts they have when away. Hopefully all works out for you.
Author Goldie5 Posted March 21, 2012 Author Posted March 21, 2012 It could be he has been looking around and maybe even dated a few women and then realized you are much better than they are. Hard to say. Do you know a good psychic? Seriously. In the past they have saved me a lot of time and trouble by seeing the bigger picture. Not really my thing. Thanks for the suggestion though. Sigh.
WoMann Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 Well I certainly hope he isn't, but it's a possibility. It's the reason that they put so much effort into things when they are with their partner. It's a way of coping with the thoughts they have when away. Hopefully all works out for you. Troll post is obvious troll.
WoMann Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 I think your boyfriend had unprotected sex with a hooker or your best friend or both and is feeling guilty. I would test for STD's and not have sex with him until results are in and are not positive. Take care of your self sweetie pie!
Author Goldie5 Posted March 21, 2012 Author Posted March 21, 2012 Well I certainly hope he isn't, but it's a possibility. It's the reason that they put so much effort into things when they are with their partner. It's a way of coping with the thoughts they have when away. Hopefully all works out for you. I have found that when I am feeling iffy about a relationship, I am the complete opposite. I withdraw and distance myself from that person.
silvermercy Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 How do I go about this without sounding like I'm accusing him? That can break a relationship. I wish I knew... Maybe you can try saying it in a joking manner. Like "hey, what's up with you lately? You're being so extra attentive!" Perhaps he will give you a clue by his response. Worse comes to worse and you still don't get any results, after some time, maybe leave an internet page open. "Why is my boyfriend acting so sweet all of a sudden?" and let him see it. lol But you can't let that go on forever. If none of his explanations satisfy you, then at some point you'll have to discuss it and your new trust issues. Hmm... another idea would be to bring up the topic of STDs. See his response again.
Author Goldie5 Posted March 21, 2012 Author Posted March 21, 2012 I wish I knew... Maybe you can try saying it in a joking manner. Like "hey, what's up with you lately? You're being so extra attentive!" Perhaps he will give you a clue by his response. Worse comes to worse and you still don't get any results, after some time, maybe leave an internet page open. "Why is my boyfriend acting so sweet all of a sudden?" and let him see it. lol But you can't let that go on forever. If none of his explanations satisfy you, then at some point you'll have to discuss it and your new trust issues. Hmm... another idea would be to bring up the topic of STDs. See his response again. STDs? That's just a bit off topic, haha.
silvermercy Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 It wouldn't be if he has indeed fooled around as you said you suspected. In fact it is of great importance to take precautions now.
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