Is he cheating or am I being paranoid? STD in question.

[futuredentist]

This is kind of long, so I thank the people who actually read this and give me some good advice

 

My boyfriend and I have been together for a couple months now. 2 weeks ago a flesh colored bump arose on his penis head. He thought that he had cut himself somehow. Then last Monday a bunch of smaller flesh colored bumps arose. AND he goes and pops the first one that arose 2 weeks ago. He thought it was an ingrown hair or pimple or something. He thinks these bumps are from the new laundry detergent I used 3/4 weeks ago and again this past weekend (when more of the bumps arose) or it could be from dry sex or new KY. What do I believe?? I don't know. He doesn't have the time to cheat with a demanding fulltime job and part time classes at school. I DON'T cheat; neither have I EVER had an STD of some sort. I have always been healthy and clean, so I don't know what to do or think. He went for an STD test last week (urine sample) and the doctor looked at his penis and said it's nothing. The test results came back yesterday as negative. The doctor also said we can't have sex until the bumps heal, but to take his sex advice with a grain of salt. It still freaks me out though. I don't know how to support him, how did he get these bumps that he never had before? We've had dry sex before, and if it was laundry detergent why arn't the bumps other places? I beleive we've used the KY before as well. I trust him but when it comes to something like this, it gives me second thoughts. We've talked about our future together and started looking at places to move into together so, I don't know. What do I do?

 

On another note, here I'm the one freaking out about it and he is totally calm, not stressed.. Maybe it is trust issues??? I mean I had an STD scare a long time ago (it ended up being an ingrown hair lol) and I was freaking out like crazy. Why wasn't he freaking out? Anyone would freak out if they were disease free and something shows up like that right?

 

One more thing on top of it all. Here comes the suspicion part of cheating. My boyfriend is a SUPER nice guy, too nice, but is assertive as well. When his first bump arose I felt suspicious. I have never looked into his phone, I never wanted to, never wanted to start that crap, I respect his privacy, until that day. I looked in his phone and noticed some girl... Lets call her Jane, he had send her a text saying something about "How are things going, sorry it took me so long to get back to you" Her name logged into his phone was Jane(Ruby Tueday's). Okay first off, you have to put where you met the person in your phone so you can remember who they are. So, I deleted the number out of his phone and I think I might of deleted the text message. Welp, I look in his phone after he had showed me more of the flesh colored bumps that had risen a day or two after, and her name is back in his phone. I tried to delete it again and accidently called the number. I hurried and hung up, deleted the number but didn't know how to delete the call. So then I deleted all of his call history and all of his text messages because I got scared he would find out somehow. Ofcoarse he wondered how that happened but didn't accuse me. I know from experience men and woman can't be friends. I have mail friends that I've had sex with before that are "my friends". I have male friends that I haven't had sex with that I would just like as friends and they want more. Men and woman can't be friends. It makes me want to check his phone again in a couple days to see if the girl is back into his phone. I HATE THIS! This is why I never ever want to look or disrespect someones privacy because once you find something your suspicions of it turns to an addiction to find out the truth or the things your loved one isn't telling you. So it's like what do I do?

[dasein]

What do you mean by "dry sex?" IMO you are working yourself up needlessly. All kinds of things could cause that kind of dermatitis, from him masturbating with something to your having something on your hand and touching him. Do they look like "bumps?" or "warts?" wiki up "genital warts," I imagine they have pics (but don't want to see them right this minute, so you will have to confirm that yourself). Also wiki up "contact dermatitis."

 

This isn't a medical forum though, so will just repeat that I think you are working yourself up needlessly on the emotional side, and you should do more medical research on the physical/medical side.

[futuredentist]

Yes, I have looked up the STD's in question but the results came out negative so obviously he is clean.

[Chi townD]

Well, I don't know what exactlly they tested him for. But, for a full STD battery is what they needed to do. It's a urethral swab and do a smear on a blood plate and a chocolate plate for bacteria growth, blood tests for HIV and a RPR for syphilis. Then they should have lanced one of the bumps, swabbed it and smeared it on a microscope plate and looked under the microscope to see what was going on.

 

If they didn't do all of this, then I wouldn't have sex with the guy. If you do, condoms are a must.