Kaotic Posted March 20, 2012 Posted March 20, 2012 We've (or I have) been on NC since Thursday...On Friday he sent me a message in response to a voicemail that I left him but I did not respond...I want to contact him so badly... Today is hard on me for some reason, harder than the last few days have been... I got some confusing, and what I think is bad, advice from a friend and I think that got me worried and the wheels in my head turning so now I'm stressed about not talking to him... I still think that we will get back together, however foolish that may sound. I think we just need time apart and some NC for him to think
BMZMJ Posted March 20, 2012 Posted March 20, 2012 Honestly it is very hard but you got give him at least 1 week if not 2. If he doesnt start to miss you by then, then...you get the point. Just try to think of something else as soon as you catch yourself thinking of the past. Watch a funny TV show, or go for a jog, or to the gym. Keep yourself distracted. 1
Author Kaotic Posted March 20, 2012 Author Posted March 20, 2012 I have been trying Thanks for the advice. Weekdays are harder I think and thats part of why I've even had enough spare time to think and stress this much. On Friday and all through the weekend I kept busy with friends and family the entire time but today its my regular Tuesday routine of work and my evening class and without him in my routine :-/
Chi townD Posted March 20, 2012 Posted March 20, 2012 I still think that we will get back together, however foolish that may sound. I think we just need time apart and some NC for him to think NC should NEVER be for him. NC is a tool for YOU to heal and move on. Sure is hard. DAMN HARD...but it's required for you to finally move on with your life.
mike588 Posted March 20, 2012 Posted March 20, 2012 We've (or I have) been on NC since Thursday...On Friday he sent me a message in response to a voicemail that I left him but I did not respond...I want to contact him so badly... Today is hard on me for some reason, harder than the last few days have been... I got some confusing, and what I think is bad, advice from a friend and I think that got me worried and the wheels in my head turning so now I'm stressed about not talking to him... I still think that we will get back together, however foolish that may sound. I think we just need time apart and some NC for him to think My ex. dumped me 7 months ago and I went No Contact...it was one of the hardest things I've ever done. I too so badly wanted to contact her and almost did 500+ times but am so glad now I didn't thanks to everyone here telling me not to. Last month she contacts me several times. Stick with it....don't give in!!
divine010 Posted March 20, 2012 Posted March 20, 2012 NC is hard to do especially if you both loved and cared a lot for each other. However, it is the best way for you heal physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. But at some point if you feel you are strong enough to contact him, then follow your heart. But when you are ready. Easy said then done, we all have slipped at some point and I wouldn't ask anybody when is a good time to break NC. Some went 2 weeks, 3 month and more before they contacted their ex. Because everyone's situation or the reason for the break-up is different, plus the amount of time you were together, friend before a couple, the dynamics just depend. But NC is just to get you back on track and to control yourself. So that whoever contacts who, you both will hopefully be in better places. Now I don't know if he hurt you or what. But the NC is good for you and you alone. I am sure he will miss you, it's natural and if anybody tells you on here differently, then they are not telling the truth. Guys deal with break-ups differently then us ladies. So if you don't hear from him after 2 weeks, it doesn't mean anything. Don't panic either. When you find yourself doing that, call someone close, write it out, pray anything that's going to keep you focused on the positives and get better. 1
Bradly Posted March 20, 2012 Posted March 20, 2012 I'm having a hard time today too! Yesterday I was mad at her... and today I just miss her. I want to text her so bad today!!! but I wont... and neither will you. Read this : http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/coping/317864-you-putting-your-ex-pedestal-they-dont-deserve
Author Kaotic Posted March 20, 2012 Author Posted March 20, 2012 Hahahahaha thanks Bradley! That gave my a good laugh of nothing else! Wouldn't call my ex an evil monkey hahaha but it's true, anger is much easier to deal with and I had wished that I was angry since we broke up because aner is easy! It's the sadness that's hard to cope with. But brad, stay strong! :-) NC for both of us with the ex. I be nice and polite and answer if he calls me but I certainly can't be doing the calling.
Author Kaotic Posted March 21, 2012 Author Posted March 21, 2012 I know I will sound stupid for saying this, but I'm Having the hardest time tonight I really believed that NC and some time alone would make him realize what he lost and what we had. But now I'm worrie that he won't. And I don't know how to deal with that. I don't know how to cope with the thought that he may be 100% over it I love him as much as ever, and I can't see how he could just be so distant and so quick about it.
Bradly Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 Kaotic, I know how you feel.. as soon as I started NC i thought she was going to think i was contacting my ex again (and im not) or looking for someone else ... im being good... holding my ground and being good. i don't want anyone else, its just better that i don't speak to her right now. Time is an amazing healer.. it is what it is and just take one new day at a time... life could be worse, your healthy
CaliBabe Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 You will have your hard days and easier days, thats totally normal. I find that venting, and calling a friend really helps. From there I try to occupy my time whether it be something simple like a movie, reading a book, listening to music or going out for some shopping. Your day tomorrow will hopefully be better. Come back here to vent if needed, we are all here for ya!
divine010 Posted March 21, 2012 Posted March 21, 2012 I know I will sound stupid for saying this, but I'm Having the hardest time tonight I really believed that NC and some time alone would make him realize what he lost and what we had. But now I'm worrie that he won't. And I don't know how to deal with that. I don't know how to cope with the thought that he may be 100% over it I love him as much as ever, and I can't see how he could just be so distant and so quick about it. I wrote alot, especially when my friends weren't available and I needed to give them a break from burning a hole in their ear...ha ha..writing cleanses the soul. If you need to write a letter to him on here or in a journal, then do so. Shopping and massage therapy is the best, but only if you can afford it. Going out of town for a few days with a friend (s) is fun. Taking a dance class or aerobics class helps. I've been going back to church since I quit my 2nd job and getting more invovled there and doing what I love -- and thats helping other people! Do what your hearts desire, just hang in there. Your not stupid for feeling weak or vunerlable or sorry or hate, anger. Its shows you actually have something to feel. I don't believe in bottling up my feelings and hurting inside. Oh no! It's not healthy and it will take a toll on your body. I can't say that your gonna feel GREAT after a few weeks or months, but you will feel better and stronger than the week or month before. I know I did. Cause I was to in the "mixed" feelings phase and you must embrace it as it comes and not hold it in, or it will take longer for you to heal. Hope your alright today!
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