latexyankee Posted March 19, 2012 Posted March 19, 2012 9 months NC, and I sort of bumped into the ex. Well all that really happened was I saw her at the light in her car with my old friend. We didnt make eye contact, I'm pretty certain she didn't even see me. That was 2 days ago and I feel horrible. I've never been very good dealing with B/U's ESPECIALLY this one, but jesus it wasn't like we talked or I saw her with another guy. I've been feeling pretty good lately, new job, much fitter/attractive. This has set me back so much, I'm thinking of her constantly. I feel as if I've made no progress in 9 whole months. Just the sight of her sent me in a downward spiral. Am I missing something? I've been telling myself how much I have to be happy for and was actually starting to believe it, until the other day. My confidence feels shot and I feel extremely weak. I'm comtemplating trying reach out for some dating just to get back out there, instead of whining around about this. I haven't approached a single female since the BU, I even caught some girls checking me out but did not react for whatever reason, maybe dating or at least trying will push me over the edge? Thoughts?
CopingGal Posted March 20, 2012 Posted March 20, 2012 You are doing fine. It's just a setback. You will have them along the way. It's normal. It's okay. Keep doing the NC and heal and get strong. You will date again when you are ready. I had a set back too, but unlike you, I brought the situation on myself. Anyway, you will be fine. You will heal from this setback and continue to heal some more.
Philosoraptor Posted March 20, 2012 Posted March 20, 2012 There are bumps in the road for everyone. All we can do is realize they are temporary and continue on the path that will bring us happiness.
Author latexyankee Posted March 20, 2012 Author Posted March 20, 2012 While I appreciate it, it just doesn't seem right to me. I mean it was a glance I had, I stared for maybe 10 seconds and then bam she was gone. That 10 seconds has been playing over and over in my head for days. I NEVER EVER NOT ONCE BROKE NC, since the day she sent her cowardly EMAIL!, explaining that it was over, and I feel like this is what i get? This is what I'm made of? Strong enough (just barely) to not beg for answers for 9 months and a glimmer of her sends me over the edge? I feel spineless, worthless. And the steps i've made on myself to boot, I SHOULD feel great or indifferent, but now i'm getting worried that i may not be able to shake this biatch. It's ALMOST like the first week again with all the anxiousness I'm feeling. I'm back here so that says something. And while i love 99% of you here, I have nowhere else to rant and zero humans to talk to that would care or listen to any of this banter, so please don't think I WANT to feel bad. Much Love...
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