zanzi Posted March 17, 2012 Posted March 17, 2012 Iv'e already written on here about the end of a recent relationship, but I have a couple more things Iv'e been wondering about. The ex says, he wants to be friends. He said he cares about me and worries about me sometimes. I do not know if he means he will talk to me sometimes, or if things will stay relatively the same. ( I have clinical major depression and he must have heard how down I was getting, mmm, how embarressing. Nothing quite like being remembered as "the crazy girl".) I dont think I am completely over him. Sometimes I find myself chanting to myself when I slip into certain memories " were friends now, friends, freinds, freinds." To remind myself. Iv'e never been friends with an ex before. Should I just continue "no contact" until my feelings are all dead and un resurrectafiable? Just to be safe. I am severely depressed at the moment ( on suicide watch) and I dont need to be taken advantage of. Also disturbingly, when I said goodbye to him, we hugged once for a really unecessarily long time, then hugged again for quite a long time. It wasnt a "haha, were buddies hug", there was still sexual friction there or whatever. That was all that happened, maybe I am reading too much into it and being very careful.
BewitchedandBothered Posted March 17, 2012 Posted March 17, 2012 Iv'e already written on here about the end of a recent relationship, but I have a couple more things Iv'e been wondering about. The ex says, he wants to be friends. He said he cares about me and worries about me sometimes. I do not know if he means he will talk to me sometimes, or if things will stay relatively the same. ( I have clinical major depression and he must have heard how down I was getting, mmm, how embarressing. Nothing quite like being remembered as "the crazy girl".) I dont think I am completely over him. Sometimes I find myself chanting to myself when I slip into certain memories " were friends now, friends, freinds, freinds." To remind myself. Iv'e never been friends with an ex before. Should I just continue "no contact" until my feelings are all dead and un resurrectafiable? Just to be safe. I am severely depressed at the moment ( on suicide watch) and I dont need to be taken advantage of. Also disturbingly, when I said goodbye to him, we hugged once for a really unecessarily long time, then hugged again for quite a long time. It wasnt a "haha, were buddies hug", there was still sexual friction there or whatever. That was all that happened, maybe I am reading too much into it and being very careful. most guys get a woody when they hug like that. Sorry, just being goofy;) Don't read too much into it; it was a goodbye hug. Why do you want to be friends with this person? How would you feel watching your 'friend' in a new relationship?? food for thought. Cut all ties. You are very fragile and need to heal. Do not respond, do not text. He owes it to you to leave you alone, especially in your state of mind, being clinically depressed. You need your space to heal, being 'friends' with this guy is just an excuse to stick around, rake in some dying embers and hope you both smolder again. he is pulling away, let him go. You deserve someone who doesn't throw bread crumbs at you and offer friendship as a consolation prize. Sure, he cares for you. I care for my dog. he's being nice, fine. Let him wonder. If he loves you, he will move mountains to get to you. But YOU need to take care of YOU and only YOU. YOU come first, got it? Don't pander to a guy who wants his ego stroked.
Author zanzi Posted March 17, 2012 Author Posted March 17, 2012 hm your probably right. I am pretty tired of being used for whatever purpose. i dont really want to say goodbye, but its better then being used. I def still have feelings for him. 1
BewitchedandBothered Posted March 17, 2012 Posted March 17, 2012 hm your probably right. I am pretty tired of being used for whatever purpose. i dont really want to say goodbye, but its better then being used. I def still have feelings for him. Of course you still have feelings, but that won't last. when you start healing, those feelings will pass. He doesn't deserve your feelings. You have no choice but to say goodbye; he did. Get him out of your system and heal. you need that time for you.
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