fortyninethousand322 Posted March 16, 2012 Posted March 16, 2012 Like the play "Cyrano de Bergerac". A guy who writes letters for other guys. I'm thinking of giving online dating another try. Apparently my photos are/were really bad so I need to fix them. But, I think my messages were really boring too. They made references to stuff in their profiles but really had no sizzle or spice or anything really intriguing. So I'm thinking about getting someone I know who is a bit better with women to write my messages for me. I'd give them a general idea of what I want to write and they can just do it better. Anyone ever try something like this? Good idea? Bad idea? Am I delusional?
ThaWholigan Posted March 16, 2012 Posted March 16, 2012 A little unorthodox, and while I imagine it may get your foot in the door, could possibly backfire when one is unveiled as not as skills a wordsmith as one appeared. My advice would be to find sources of information on how to be better with words. I have an extensive vocabulary, but I'm not the most skillful when it comes to using my words to attract women. Sometimes it works, most times it's terrible
somedude81 Posted March 16, 2012 Posted March 16, 2012 Before you do that, higher someone to write a good profile for you as well. And yes, services like that actually exist. You might also want to get some photos staged as well.
Author fortyninethousand322 Posted March 16, 2012 Author Posted March 16, 2012 A little unorthodox, and while I imagine it may get your foot in the door, could possibly backfire when one is unveiled as not as skills a wordsmith as one appeared. My advice would be to find sources of information on how to be better with words. I have an extensive vocabulary, but I'm not the most skillful when it comes to using my words to attract women. Sometimes it works, most times it's terrible I'm good in person, and I'm good at writing. I just don't know how to sound sexy to a woman or how to flirt (in person or online). I figure the worst case scenario I end up with a few practice dates.
Author fortyninethousand322 Posted March 16, 2012 Author Posted March 16, 2012 Before you do that, higher someone to write a good profile for you as well. And yes, services like that actually exist. You might also want to get some photos staged as well. I thought about that, having someone write the whole profile up. I may look into it. So your suggestion is to hire a professional and not have someone who knows me and is good with women do it? Hmm...
ThaWholigan Posted March 16, 2012 Posted March 16, 2012 I'm good in person, and I'm good at writing. I just don't know how to sound sexy to a woman or how to flirt (in person or online). I figure the worst case scenario I end up with a few practice dates. I hear you man. Honestly, I don't quite know exactly how to be sexy either. Like I say, there are resources we can look to so we can help ourselves.
somedude81 Posted March 16, 2012 Posted March 16, 2012 I thought about that, having someone write the whole profile up. I may look into it. So your suggestion is to hire a professional and not have someone who knows me and is good with women do it? Hmm... What you would do is have some type of interview where the service would ask you questions about yourself and then based on your answers write your profile. I'm sure they can also help you with sending messages. There are also companies that can take professional, casual looking photos of you for use on dating websites.
CC12 Posted March 17, 2012 Posted March 17, 2012 So I'm thinking about getting someone I know who is a bit better with women to write my messages for me. I'd give them a general idea of what I want to write and they can just do it better. Anyone ever try something like this? Good idea? Bad idea? Am I delusional? I think having someone else write messages for you is a little misleading. What do you think the recipients would think if they knew someone else wrote it for you? They'd probably think you either couldn't be bothered to spend your own time and energy to write a simple message to them, or they'd think you're too shy or too inept to casually talk to them. Why don't you instead ask that person you know who is better with women to give you some tips on how to approach and flirt? Teach a man to fish, and all that.
Nightsky Posted March 17, 2012 Posted March 17, 2012 I think it all sounds like a bad idea especialy paying some one.
RedRobin Posted March 17, 2012 Posted March 17, 2012 I'm going to politely disagree with some of the other opinions. Sometimes people need some coaching to fine tune their approach. Having a 'Cyrano' is no different than having a resume writing service, IMHO. You will need to make sure that everything in your profile is 100% accurate though. No fibbing on your activities, lifestyle, values or anything else that is absolutely relevant. How it is put forward *IS* all marketing though. I'd draw the line on conversations though. If you have a 'Cyrano'... make sure, again, that whatever you say in conversations is the real you. It's ok to pay someone to bounce ideas off of and ask advice on how to initiate contact and respond once you get it. Your Cyrano should be like your training wheels. Eventually you'll figure it out and you can ride on your own. Female friends are good for this too, you know. Bouncing ideas off of... As long as you have good intentions (looking for a relationship... not just someone to f*ck) I don't see any harm in it. 1
Diamonds&Rust Posted March 17, 2012 Posted March 17, 2012 I don't know whether you should do that, but I'm leaning towards no. you could spend all day reading the oktrends blog at okcupid, it's some of the most fascinating data on the planet and it's always a good read. here's a great article about getting good profile pictures. it's a really interesting way of looking at photos: Don’t Be Ugly By Accident! « OkTrends lots of good stuff on that blog, the research doesn't always correspond with what you'd most think.
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