SecretsToTell Posted March 16, 2012 Posted March 16, 2012 My best friend of 20 years screwed me over about 8 months ago. Its a very long story but she lost her mother to cancer a few months before we had a fall out. She totally changed how she treated me and said some horrible things to me. Things that I will never forget. Its a long story but slowly she just started acting like a witch. Saying rude things, blowing off plans, etc. The last time I saw her was at a sports bar and it was the same night we had plans to go out and she blew me off but I ended up seeing her while I was out at the same place. I confronted her, she was completely wasted ( I didn't know how drunk she was at the time) and she said some mean things, and I told her she had no right saying anything to me about character being how she cheats on her husband regularly. She than slapped me across the face and some people that worked there saw it and asked her to leave the sports bar. That was 8 months ago. Well turns out she is telling people that we mutually know nasty untrue things about me, esp regarding that night. She is spreading lies and making me look bad. I have not repeated what happened to anyone. When people asked why we werent speaking I just say we grew apart. But she is spreading rumors and its pretty embarrassing for me. I'm 30 years old and maybe this wouldn't have bothered me when I was younger, being talked about but I'm too old for this. I tried sending her a note via facebook but she just wrote back something nasty. I live about 45 minutes away and have thought many times about going to her house and trying to talk to her in person but I didn't want to do it when her husband was there and cause a scene. I'm tempted to tell her husband about her infidelity, I really am. I feel bad for the guy. And from what I hear he was told something completely different than what actually happened that night. I know she isn't the person I once called my closest friend and that makes me sad. Since we are not friends anymore I feel that I should tell her husband what shes doing...wrong?
Author SecretsToTell Posted March 16, 2012 Author Posted March 16, 2012 I'm sorry I posted this in the wrong section... but if it doesn't get removed if you have advice I'm more than happy to hear it.
Pasttense Posted March 16, 2012 Posted March 16, 2012 I think telling the husband is just going to escalate the problems you have with her, not decrease them.
Untouchable_Fire Posted March 16, 2012 Posted March 16, 2012 Since we are not friends anymore I feel that I should tell her husband what shes doing...wrong? ... did you know the husband? Speaking as someone who has been cheated on a few times... it's nice to have someone step up and let you know... even if it's anonymous. The only people that go straight into denial mode are idiots. That said... everyone is a bit different. Do you have proof she cheated? He may ask for that.
Author SecretsToTell Posted March 16, 2012 Author Posted March 16, 2012 I think telling the husband is just going to escalate the problems you have with her, not decrease them. At this point I'm not trying to decrease or increase, I felt it was necessary to give background on why I would even consider telling her husband the truth. I don't really care about what it does to her, she isn't the same person. I feel bad for him, always have.
Author SecretsToTell Posted March 16, 2012 Author Posted March 16, 2012 ... did you know the husband? Speaking as someone who has been cheated on a few times... it's nice to have someone step up and let you know... even if it's anonymous. The only people that go straight into denial mode are idiots. That said... everyone is a bit different. Do you have proof she cheated? He may ask for that. No I don't have proof. I know he had "thoughts" that something was still going on with an old boyfriend and I can confirm that as well as other men, but I never took pictures or anything lol
Pasttense Posted March 16, 2012 Posted March 16, 2012 What? All you can do is confirm is that you saw her flirting with these guys? I suggest you just disengage completely from her and the husband.
Author SecretsToTell Posted March 16, 2012 Author Posted March 16, 2012 I can confirm much more tham flirting.
udolipixie Posted March 16, 2012 Posted March 16, 2012 Since we are not friends anymore I feel that I should tell her husband what shes doing...wrong? No keep it to yourself. Seems like you never really felt bad enough for him to tell him until you felt angered by her and wanted revenger.
InJest Posted March 16, 2012 Posted March 16, 2012 I think you should tell her husband that the reason you two grew apart was due to her cheating on him. It did play an indirect part.
nofool4u Posted March 16, 2012 Posted March 16, 2012 I'm tempted to tell her husband about her infidelity, I really am. Do it. He needs to know so he can decide if he wants to put that crazy b!tch on the street. Since we are not friends anymore I feel that I should tell her husband what shes doing...wrong? Nope, not wrong at all. Its oh so right. He deserves to know what a huss he is married to, and deserves to know that she is playing him for a fool. If you didn't say anything, then I'd be disappointed in you.
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