Mother of my child has a new boyfriend. now what?

[massivered92]

hey guys, im new to this, but was was told it could help so thought why not give it a shot. Firstly sorry for this being so long, and sorry if my grammar is hard to understand. I was rubbish at English at school but ill try my hardest.

 

Basically, i am 20 years old and my ex girlfriend is 17. (i know sh*t happens, not ideal but still can be done).

 

We only found out about our baby with two months to go, my ex girlfriend didnt even have a bump until the last couple of weeks. She gave birth to a beautiful baby girl and the first couple weeks werent easy. But we managed to get through them due to the help of our families support and help. However all this time something was on my mind..

 

Im bit of a fool, but my she had cheated on me 4 times previously, and im an idiot for taking her back. Shes a better looking girl than i am a boy, but not by much, but anyway. I was paranoid that the baby wasnt mine and she was adamant it was mine. Anyway i let things die down, i was at the birth and was supportive and stood up to the mark like any decent person should.

 

This is where things went wrong, i wanted to do a dna test, and so did my family. However my ex girlfriends mum was very against the idea and basically shouted at me for making her worry about it. So me and my ex who we will call "T", did one. I was the one who paid for it too.

 

Time went on and nothing came back and me being paranoid thought that she may have not sent it incase that she knew deep down the baby wasnt mine. We argued and argued for days and then we broke up. Just like that, a month old baby and she dumped me. Said it was"too much". I gave her time, and saw the baby once a weekend "not as much as id like but T and her mum seem to think i can see the baby when it suits them. Time went on, we were civil, but me and T just spoke as friends and maybe i pushed her away by basically saying lets get back together and do the test. I dont know. Too late now..

 

Then a couple weeks ago, i lost patience with no dna results, so i decided to contact the company, who said that the address i gave them and names we gave them were not registered on there system. In simple terms, they didnt receive the samples. So i used my craftiness and got another one, one which the mother doesnt need to do. We did it, T signed it results came and the baby is mine. Over the moon

 

But on the same day, i found out that T had found a new boy (a popular player who is reknowned for playing girls around) and had slept with him. Completely going against her promise of respecting me for the sake of the baby. I was heartbroken. Its not nice knowing that somebody you love is having sex with another man. She said she had moved on and i should too. All this within a month!!! i was devasted.

 

To be honest, i know i cannot control her feelings, if she has moved on then she has moved on. Ill be there for the baby as i should, if im honest im jealous that her new boyfriend will be seeing my baby too. Infact it hurts.

 

But relating back to the title. Im only 20, how am i going to move on? I loved T so much, took her back several times, and she is beautful, naturally pretty, (im not saying this out of feelings, im just stating facts here) And going on what people have said, Im good looking, not Zac Efron, brad pitt stature, but ya know. average good looking person. Sorry if i sound bigheaded.

 

My main worry is, who is going to want to be my girlfriend now? I have a baby. I know for sure that i wouldnt really want a girlfriend who had a baby. That is maybe a little picky of me, but i cant help that. Im just worried that nobody will want me whilst T goes off with yet another boy and breaking my heart. Please help i dont know what to do.

 

Any help would be gratefully received.

 

Before you judging me as a young dad. a few pointers.

 

: i am very shy, confident in some things but im a quiet lad

: i am the least expected person to have a child at this age. I was good at school, wasnt a bully, didnt do drugs etc etc im just a normal guy

: i do work, i have two jobs, both part time.

: i dont have a criminal record, nor do i vandalise things.

:im very paranoid and self conscious

 

basically saying, if any of you are stereotypical of young dads and think i am a so called "chav" im not.

 

once again, any help will be received gratefully.

thanks guys