beuriv Posted March 14, 2012 Posted March 14, 2012 I need some thoughtful advice. (Why is dating so difficult): I met a woman on a personals' site, we had some good exchanges, nothing amazing, but solid enough that we were both very interested in meeting. We went out to dinner one night, had a great time and when I asked her out again, all seemed positive. I let her drive me to my car that night even though it was only about 100 feet away. I thought that offer was a good sign too! We spoke a few days later and I went to her house the following night for dinner. I offered to bring food, she decided to make it, and I met her two little, energetic kids as well. After dinner, she set the kids up watching a movie in their room, came out and sat on the couch next to me.....at the other end. It wasn't terribly inviting so I felt like it was time to go and she said OK. As I was getting ready to leave, she told me she needed to ask me something but didn't want me to freak out. "Are you like.....gay or bi?" I wasn't expecting THAT one. I wasn't thrilled that she posed the question but I wasn't angry. She told me she had a bad experience once and she knew that I was very neat, etc., so she needed to know. I mean, I'm not a lumberjack or a big rig diesel trucker and I'm not glued to NFL football on Sundays but I am 100% straight. Anyway, it made things kind of awkward. Nonetheless, we kissed for a short while, each made one or two amorous comments, and I asked her when I could see her again. She said probably next week. (She works 13 hour shifts on Friday, Saturday and Sunday and has her little kids the rest of the time so it's not easy.) I told her I thought she was really sexy and I couldn't wait to see her again. She smiled, said good night and I left. I wasn't sure what to do so a few days later, I sent a text simply saying, "How are ya?" but I never heard back. I saw her online profile and can see that she's been on the site recently. Should I just give up? I have no idea what to do. I mean it wasn't love at first site, but I thought there was potential and I liked her. ****PLEASE, I'm looking for some thoughtful advice, not 'forget about her and move on' or 'don't sweat it man.' I'd like someone - probably a WOMAN - to give me some ideas. Thanks!****
Patrice Posted March 14, 2012 Posted March 14, 2012 I would call her. Be straight up and pleasant. Hi, how is your week going, chit chat. Learn about her, sometimes we females need to know you are interested in us and our life too. If she doesn't take the call, leave a message. Then I'd go to the 3 day rule, if no contact in that amount of time, it's on her to contact you. We all get frightened in relationships, don't assume the worst .. but keep one foot solidly planted in now what mode .... hope this helps. Hiding is for babies, if you hide, you appear immature, if she is and does, she appears dishonest and afraid.
pteromom Posted March 14, 2012 Posted March 14, 2012 Sounds like she was burned before and is cautious. Since she said she was interested in going out next week, I'd call her and ask what day she would like to go out. If it goes to voicemail, and she doesn't call back, I'd drop it.
FitChick Posted March 14, 2012 Posted March 14, 2012 She sounds a bit flaky. She has two small kids yet she brings a strange man over to her house after meeting him once? I feel sorry for her kids.
Author beuriv Posted March 14, 2012 Author Posted March 14, 2012 To Patrice and Pteromom, thanks so much for taking the time! Fitchick, you passed judgement and obviously forgot the first line of my post. Your reply wasn't the least bit helpful or thoughtful.
Nightsky Posted March 14, 2012 Posted March 14, 2012 Fitchics right I mean who brings a guy she just met around her kids and then calls him gay while they are upstairs... Also you asked for advice from women specificaly what do you expect. Do you have children? How old are you and why are you so attracted to a woman with two children? I'm just curious. A txt of "how are ya?" is hardly something that cries to be responded too. Why didn't you set up a date before your last one was over? Why wasn't your txt about how you need to see her again? If you really want this woman just tell her you want to see her again. All you can do.
JesseJames Posted March 14, 2012 Posted March 14, 2012 No I agree with Fitchick. I blindly went on a date with a woman with a boy at home. She just invites me over and we watch part of a movie and talk some. I didn't think she'd keep the boy around for a date. But, the kid is around and doesn't react well of course. She sees this and that was that. Women are so stupid many times.
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