Numb79 Posted March 13, 2012 Posted March 13, 2012 It has been 6 weeks since the break up. 6 weeks of NC. Its a weird feeling now. Gone is the anger..... I am still sad at times but it no longer hurts. Its more like an emptiness.... and maybe a little bit of fear mixed in. Is this normal? Its kind of like I lost my purpose in life.... like what do I do now? Fear of never being married and having kids of my own...... So where do I go from here?
blindnowisee Posted March 13, 2012 Posted March 13, 2012 I'm at the same stage. It has been 6 weeks for me as well. Had very limited contact to clear out our old apartment and will be moving into my new apartment this week. The main problem I'm currently experiencing is that my job is not given me any satisfaction whatsoever. Whereas before I'd tolerate it because of the life I was building I now realise that I should never settle for mediocrity and should start fulfilling my ambitions again. I'm finding it hard to motivate myself and grow more bored as the days go by. I think this is a natural process though and I need to find a way to build up that motivation again. I think I have the same feeling that you're currently having as well. Maybe not missing the old relationship as such but just missing the feeling of 'being together' instead of going it all alone. What are you doing to motivate yourself numb?
Author Numb79 Posted March 13, 2012 Author Posted March 13, 2012 I have plans in my head... but I can't execute those plans at this moment. I currently have a broken foot that will take about another 5 weeks to heal. The only time I find peace is when I am about to fall asleep and I am thinking about these plans...... I know what you mean about not missing the relationship. I am somewhat sad at the fact that someone that has played such a great role in my life....... is now not apart of it in any way shape or form. We were once so close but its like we are complete strangers now. Weird..... Not even sure if I have made any progress
Philosoraptor Posted March 13, 2012 Posted March 13, 2012 Now is when you start living for you. Find new hobbies, spend more time with friends and family, volunteer somewhere... do whatever makes you happy. If you're hobbled right now there are still plenty of things you can do. Work on a bucket list for when you are healed.
Chi townD Posted March 13, 2012 Posted March 13, 2012 I saw a movie this weekend and there's a quote that has stuck with me from it. "You don't choose a life, you live one." So, now it's time to start living a life. There's a whole world outside your front door that has a ton of people in it. All of them from different backgrounds and different cultures. Walk out your front door! My break up happened many,many years ago. What helped was changing me all around. But, the first weekend of the break up, a friend grabbed me and we jumped a 5 hour train ride to St. Louis. We walked around, visited clubs, caught a Cardinals game, met people around us, I leaned up against the Arch (the Gateway to the West!) and the trip didn't cost me an arm and a leg! Did that trip kill my pain? Nope, but it did get me out of my comfort zone and experience new things. Even danced with a few girls at one of the clubs down there (AND I DON'T DANCE!!) From that weekend, I caught a bug. I wanted to see everything! Experience things! And people have come along on the journey as well! I've been to over a dozen different countries and my Ex told me I was a loser and never going anywhere in life. Well, my life has taken me around the world! I don't think she ever left the country. That's how I got my revenge. I became successful, well traveled and I met my wife and my partner along the journey and I became a parent! And they humor me and understand my need to travel. After about 9 months to a year...I need to go somewhere. ANYWHERE. I make a plan...and I go. Now, I know you don't feel like doing anything or going anywhere. But, my friend had to push me. So, I want you to pick a place. Somewhere you've always want to go. I want to you to invision yourself going there. Make a plan. Save your money for this trip and go. It doesn't have to be grand like the Red Square in Moscow. It could be the Grand Canyon, or the Sierra Mountains. Where have you always want to go? What do you want to see?
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