is she simply losing interest?

[odkits]

we met online, set up a date within a week of first online communication, and texted in the week leading up to the date. based on our online communication and through texting, we seemed to have a lot in common and we have a similar sense of humor, so she seemed like a good match for me.

 

our first date was just over two weeks ago - we met for afternoon coffee - and we talked and joked for about 2.5 hours. she seemed pretty comfortable throughout the date, but i felt awkward and shy talking about myself for much of the time before finally opening up towards the end; i wouldn't have been surprised if she didn't want to see me again after the first date because i felt so awkward, but she told me that she definitely wanted to see me again. she texted me the next day, hoping that i had a good night the previous night (the same as our date), and i asked her if she wanted to grab dinner the following week, to which she said, "definitely yes."

 

there was about a week and a half between our first and second dates because we were both busy, but we texted intermittently, both of us initiating at times. our second date was midweek this past week; i drove out her way - we live about 30-40 minutes away from each other - and we grabbed dinner. i felt much more relaxed this time around and i felt the conversation really flowed well. we spent a lot of time laughing and joking, and we also discussed her passions and family life; she has been pretty open and transparent with me, and she hasn't held much back. much like the first date, i asked most of the questions and she did most of the talking, but i definitely felt more comfortable talking about myself when she asked me questions.

 

dinner and conversation again lasted about 2.5 hours, but she decided to cut the night short because we both had to be up early the next morning. there was no real physical contact after the first date aside from a hug, but after dinner on the second date i grabbed her hand on the walk back to the car and i kissed her a couple of times in my car before she left.

 

now, this could all be in my head, but the kisses felt a bit rushed and she left my car quickly after i kissed her; i remember telling her that we should get together again soon and she said "yes" even though she was going to have family in town over the weekend. she also told me to contact her when i got home to make sure i made it back alright. i did text her when i got home and she responded, thanking me for driving out to see her, paying for dinner, and wishing that her and her family would have a good time.

 

i knew she was excited to have her family in town and she would be a bit busy, but i texted and called her one time over the weekend to try and set up another date for the following week. she didn't respond to either contact for over a day and a half, texting me late in the evening to say that she didn't respond to any forms of communication while her family was in town, but that she was sorry for not getting back to me sooner. she also said she was busy on the day i suggested we get together (she is legitimately busy on that day but she didn't suggest a different day) and she was sorry we couldn't get together on that day. i texted her the next day to suggest that we get together another day, later on in the week, but she never responded to that text; we haven't communicated since (it's been about a day and a half since that text).

 

now i can understand her not responding to me while her family is in town, but i've gotten the sense that she is losing interest or has already lost all interest in seeing me again. even though dinner went really well on the second date - i thought it went much better than our first date - i got the vibe that something was off; it's difficult to explain, but it's a gut feeling.

 

her last initiated contact was the day of the date and it's unusual that she would not respond to texts or phone calls; she had never not responded until this past weekend. i do want to mention that, aside from one or two days before our first date where we texted at length, we don't usually call or text unless we're setting up plans or discussing plans to see each other, so neither of us is texting or call too often.

 

i don't know if she met someone else - i know her schedule is quite busy and she mentioned on her first date that she wasn't seeing anyone else - or if she just isn't that into me or if she is just really busy.

 

i feel like the ball is in her court now that i've made a couple of attempts to contact her and i've gotten little response, so i'm going to pull back for now.

 

if anyone has any insight or advice, i'd greatly appreciate it.

 

thanks in advance.

[TheFinalWord]

Go with your gut. If something didn't feel right, trust your instincts. She's not behaving in a way that a woman would if she was interested.

 

Do yourself a favor and begin removing the possibility of anything further with her from your mind. Don't text anymore.

 

Sorry brother.

[sid3]

Go with your gut. If something didn't feel right, trust your instincts. She's not behaving in a way that a woman would if she was interested.

 

Do yourself a favor and begin removing the possibility of anything further with her from your mind. Don't text anymore.

 

Sorry brother.

 

^ this. And you are right the ball is in her court. As of now she is blowing you off by not responding. You should listen to your instinct, you say you could tell something was off when you kissed her goodbye its extremely likely she did too. There's a good chance it was too soon, some people are just not comfortable kissing after only meeting a person twice.

[odkits]

thanks for the input.

 

i received a text from her a short time ago saying "yea" to my offer of getting together this week and she wished me well on a project i have in the next couple of days and to let her know how it goes.

 

i still feel a bit confused about the whole situation given the amount of time she has taken to respond to my last few attempts at contact so i'm going to continue to pull back at the moment and give myself some space to process.

 

does that sound reasonable?

[sid3]

thanks for the input.

 

i received a text from her a short time ago saying "yea" to my offer of getting together this week and she wished me well on a project i have in the next couple of days and to let her know how it goes.

 

i still feel a bit confused about the whole situation given the amount of time she has taken to respond to my last few attempts at contact so i'm going to continue to pull back at the moment and give myself some space to process.

 

does that sound reasonable?

 

Do yourself a favor and stop over thinking it. There could be a number of reasons why it took her as long as it did. I honestly haven't a clue. I would say just try not to shoot yourself in the foot by trying to use logic, its how we are wired but tends to be all but useless when trying to figure out what women we just started dating are thinking.