80smusicrocks Posted March 13, 2012 Posted March 13, 2012 Sorry about the loaded title but I figured I'd get women jumping all over this post to give me advice (or give me a piece of their mind). There is this girl (actually married woman) at my fitness club who I've gotten to know over the past year. I actually knew her husband first and eventually he introduced us. Since then we say hi to each and small talk a bit. Now the strange thing is she acts very hot and cold with me. I have to add that she is very attractive and I used to totally check her out but I respect any married man's wife so my thoughts are kept to myself and I don't flirt or come on to any married women especially this one since her husband is 6'4" and 265 lbs. Back to the hot and cold instances. Before I knew her she would always look at me through the mirrors in the club but not directly at me. I caught her several times in which she quickly looked away. At first I thought she was shy since doesn't really talk to anyone else plus she was married and chatting with other men wouldn't be appropriate. On a side note, I'm also a pretty good looking lad that's in really good shape so I do have the occasional woman look at me;) Which is what i thought she was doing. Ok in all seriousness. Once we were introduced by her husband she started being more friendly with me for several weeks. Nothing flirty but she would always initiate the conversation. Then one week she would pretty much avoid me. She would be polite say hi and keep her distance. Then the following week chat me up. This has been going on for months and along the way more strange actions occurred, like: 1. She would directly walk up to me to start a conversation and next time not say boo to me. 2. While working out with her husband she would wave to me in a hello gesture and the next time not even say hi. 3. I walked out one time as she was walking out with her kids (childcare in the club) and i said "so these are your kids" and she says "yup" and hurriedly shoos them away saying "bye". I figured she was in hurry but then spends the 10 mins with them in car. That was by far the strangest. 4. This happens the most - she would walk across the weight room to pass by me and say hi with a big smile and the next time take a route that completely away from me. 5. If i say hi to other women i know especially if they are attractive she avoids me or is very curt. 6. Takes up a cardio machine next to me even though other machines are available. Next time takes a machine on the opposite end of the machines. 7. One time a woman she knew was on machine in between us and she stopped to talked to her directly facing me but didn't say hi or bye to me as i did my warm-up even though i looked her way a few times. Then the next day she would wave to me bye when i'm in a full sprint. There are more circumstance but you get the drift. I find her actions so strange that i tend to avoid any interaction with her for weeks and wouldn't you know it she then goes of her way to come say hi to me. What do you ladies make of this?
ComMan Posted March 13, 2012 Posted March 13, 2012 All women are bat **** crazy, you as a Man should know that by now. married women are worst of them all. A woman that is not available for sex with you, are pretty worthless entity to you as well. Women's worth is only in sex providing. If she can't, then throw her like useless trash out of your life.
Author 80smusicrocks Posted March 13, 2012 Author Posted March 13, 2012 I forgot one important thing. A few months back this woman even drove by house and i know for a fact she lives two subdivisions away. It may be coincidence but I was at the end of my driveway talking to a neighbour as she drove by and she didn't even look at me (again strange) when she could clearly see me. This happened after a 3-week hiatus from the club. I was wondering, is this married woman stalking me.
quankanne Posted March 13, 2012 Posted March 13, 2012 sounds like she's playing games with you in order to get & hold your attention. If you honestly consider her off-limits, ignore her. Be civil but don't pay her any mind otherwise. Because she's gonna toy with you for however long she needs to have your attention. And that's never a good thing, be it from someone married OR single.
pteromom Posted March 14, 2012 Posted March 14, 2012 It sounds to me like you are overanalyzing what she does. As a woman with kids, taking 10 minutes to get ready to leave in the car isn't out of the realm of normalcy. It could be that she is attracted to you and wants to distance herself since she is married. Or it could be that while she feels friendly to you, she doesn't feel the need to talk to you or acknowledge you EVERY time she sees you. You say that you respect her marriage, but you seem to be focusing a lot on where she is and what she's doing in the gym. It seems weird to me. Find a single lady at the gym to watch, and don't worry about the motives of this married one... 1
dariusbenedict Posted March 14, 2012 Posted March 14, 2012 With the looks of it she's playing you out. There are some married women I know who likes to know or test if they are still capable of teasing men. Most of the time the objective is to check how attractive they are and how will a man like you react to teasing. I also agree with quankanne that her actions are to get and hold your attention. The satisfaction is coming from the confirmation that you're getting confused. It's a good advice to be civil and ignore her. Be careful man. She's married and although she might just toying you around, there's a big possibility that she's tempting you. These kinds of women have a tendency to get obsessed with something or someone. But to answer your question, no, not all married women act strange. She's dangerous. Just be careful. I know someone who got in really big trouble trying to fight back on someone teasing/tempting him.
Author 80smusicrocks Posted March 14, 2012 Author Posted March 14, 2012 I do tend to over analyze things. That's part of my personality and why i'm successful in my business. I notice things most people don't and I'm usually right. Although this is the first time a married woman has acted this way around me. Usually if I know a woman (married or not) is interested or attracted to me it's very obvious. I just don't get what this particular woman is try to achieve by her actions towards me. Never seen it before and i'm curious if this a pattern for some women that are married. I'm not tempted by crazy just intrigued. Anyways pteromom read my added post. That drive by is what really made it strange for me.
FitChick Posted March 14, 2012 Posted March 14, 2012 She's moody and/or pre-occupied with her busy life. No one consistently acts the same way in the same situation all the time. Life intrudes. I doubt she is romantically interested. Be polite but stay away.
Author 80smusicrocks Posted March 17, 2012 Author Posted March 17, 2012 Well. It happened again this week. She ignored me Monday when i initiated a "Hi" to her but Wednesday and Friday came up to me to say hi with a big smile when i was being aloof. On the Wednesday, another woman in the gym was talking to me and she walked right beside us to one of the cable extensions says 'Hi" even though the other 3 stations were free. If there was none of the weirdness from before i would say she is being friendly and nice. I'm starting to think it's funny. She is definitely playing a game. Again, is this married woman's way of seeing if she still has it without taking it further. New info - Apparently from the other woman i was talking to on Wednesday, I'm considered the hot guy at the gym (women locker room talk). Is that why this married woman wants my attention and then when i'm nice and reciprocate the attention she backs off?
threebyfate Posted March 17, 2012 Posted March 17, 2012 The dance of the egos! She's not the only one getting off on the attention.
2sunny Posted March 17, 2012 Posted March 17, 2012 Why do you care? She's married! And when my kids were young - I never noticed anyone on the street while driving. She was probably taking them to their friends house - which happened to be in your neighborhood. Stop paying attention to her- she's married! You need to date someone available - seriously.
Author 80smusicrocks Posted March 17, 2012 Author Posted March 17, 2012 I know she's married. Did I once says I was interested in her or wish she would cheat with me? NO. I don't need anyones self-righteous answer "oh she's married, stop it, blah,blah, blah..." I'm am dating and having fun. Not interested in a married woman. Being a guy that wants to get married one day I'm curious is this what married women do when they are not satisfied in a relationship or attracted to someone else. Some of you make it sound like i'm going to have an affair with this woman. I actually feel sorry for her husband because that could be me one day. Basically here's a married woman acting strange with me (and before any of you women say "oh she's just preoccupied" or "taking her kids to her friends house" and whatever bs you want to justify in your own mind) and it's obvious she's having a conflict in her mind regarding me. I know alot of women. I know mostly when a woman interested or attracted to me. In this case I find it strange how this women acts with me and its getting a little uncomfortable since I sort know her husband as well. So i guess I'll refrase my questions: For those of you that have had any experience in this situation what would you do? I'm thinking of coming right out and ask her why the hot and cold reactions to me and maybe I might even ask her why she drove by my house.
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