Leigh 87 Posted March 13, 2012 Posted March 13, 2012 Any inspiring stories of second chances working out? Me and my boyfriend gave things a second chance, a few times, and now everything worked out. He was immature and inexperienced, and I was socially inept, and had too many personal issues in the way. My personal issues caused me to pick fights with him, when he did nothing. We had a special " feeling", even though my personal situation hindered the relationship. We just felt too strongly to let it go, and so we battled it out very hard, so I could overcome my issues, and be with him. After a year, we are great, but I did have too many issues to begin with, and I have to say that working through them was very difficult on both of us.. but well worth it. Do second chances work out well, mostly? I think that, if two people have the right feelings towards each other, it makes sense that if things are hindering the relationship, than some things can be fixed. On the other hand, u could have the right feeling about the person, but the personal issues and issues at hand may simple not be able to be resolved, so u have to part ways in spite of true love. 2
ALombard Posted March 13, 2012 Posted March 13, 2012 I would say "no". I just currently got out of a situation like this with my on and off ex of 6 years. After the first initial break up there was just something different. We kept getting back together just to have one of us lose trust in the other and each time she would leave for another. We got back into contact again after six months of NC and this time things were ok for a little but we did not actually solidify a relationship. We became some weird friends/couple mixture so we were both still free to date others. I wanted a comitment she did not and now I am dealing with the fallout from that. In the long run as much as you everyone thinks that you can have a successful 2nd or 3rd chance, once it's over it's best to just let go and move on. If you don't you get stuck in what I'm in which is just a long drawn out process. I wish everyday I walked away from her 4 1/2 years ago.
JasonRules Posted March 13, 2012 Posted March 13, 2012 Who says "second" chances always has to mean the same person? Personally, I never ever go back. I respect myself too much, but aside from this once the emotion is gone my logical brain re-evaluates all their actions and I ask myself this: Can I depend on this person? And the answer is always "Absolutely NOT". For whatever reason they gave up on me because they believed there was something else better out there, but given enough time they realize that they were wrong and I was right (I told all of them that they would regret it). This is why ALL my exes down the line have come back, but by then I have become stone cold and have killed off any feelings I had for them. To me a "second" chance means giving someone new a chance. Remember, glass breaks only once.
MarlaOryx Posted March 17, 2012 Posted March 17, 2012 Leigh -- How long were you two apart? Who did the breaking up? Who reached out first? Congrats on the second chance! I think they are possible, although that would mean that both parties would have to completely let go of the past. That relationship is over. You would have to start a new relationship. Even after just a month of NC, you are both different people. So, Jason, perhaps giving someone new a chance can be an ex, as they are likely not the same person they were before. Still...it is risky, and it is often best to just walk away an not look back.
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