saveourspaceship Posted March 13, 2012 Posted March 13, 2012 I've been looking on these forums a little bit recently and thought I'd share my recent experience... so I've gone through a pretty rough break up. pretty similar story to a lot on here, so I'll spare the long version. we've been broke up for about 3 weeks, for the first few days after, I was begging and pleading to give it another chance and finally got her to to meet up with me for one final crack at getting her back... it didn't work. her mind was made up and she wanted it to be over, she made it clear that she still loves me but doesn't feel like our relationship can get back to the way it was, especially with her busy university and work schedules. I've been toying with the idea that this is GIGS, but I'm not entirely sure it is, I think I just want it to be... anyway, I've been ridiculously depressed but trying my hardest to keep my chin up and work through the dark times ahead. I'd only discovered all the break-up advice on the internet after that first week, so I was in a bit of regret, but optimistic with my new found knowledge on 'getting your ex back' and 'how to get over your ex'... we'd exchanged a few texts since the meet-up (about 2 or 3), nothing exciting really. from then on I was committed to no-contact, I wasn't going to contact her until she contacted me... so last night she sent me a text, asking how I was. I knew to keep it short, sweet, and seem like I was dealing with it okay. I'd read about the dumper getting lonely after around three or four weeks and would be expected to contact the dumpee. I replied with a simple, 'I'm fine, how are you?' she then asked me if it was okay for her to text me, as she wasn't sure whether or not it would be better for us to not speak. now... at this point. I knew 100% I had to keep it simple. absolutely no depressing talk, no emotional nonsense, just calm and casual. maybe 'you can text me when you like, just because we aren't together doesn't mean we can't talk ' something along those lines... did I do that....? of course not -_- I sent a huge text saying that I was still clinging to the idea that she would one day message me saying that she'd want me back, but deep down I knew there was no hope and I had to move on, and that I was struggling without her. yes, I know awful rookie mistake. I let my emotions take over and I let it all out and blew my beans. she replied that she shouldn't have got in contact and was sorry she did. I tried to call her to lighten the situation, just say... 'look I'm sorry I said that, I've not had anyone to talk to and I just got over-emotional... I don't want it to be weird' she didn't answer her phone, so I didn't bother trying again. she texted me about an hour later saying she was in a crappy mood, feeling lonely and missing me but didn't feel up to a conversation on the phone. I'd pretty much ruined all my hard work in the no-contact beforehand, and am back to square one. infact, probably further behind than square one. although deep down I'm fairly sure it doesn't really matter anyway, and that there's no chance of us getting back together... I still feel dumb and stupid about this whole experience. I definitely wish I'd handled it differently. Just wanted to share this experience with everybody... hopefully anybody in my situation won't make the same mistakes I did.
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