Dating A Married Man " Looking for someone in the same boat!!!

[sweetlips]

I have been in a relationship with a guy for a little over three years now. He was my high school sweet heart. We did not see each other for over 20 years and I was divorced three years ago and we ran into each other. Well sparks flew and we have been seeing each other since.

 

The problem is he's married!!!! I know that he will never leave his wife and that's O.K. I know he loves his wife very much. He tells me all the time how much I mean to him and how much he wants to be with me. I just feel awefull about the relationship because I am doing what I said I would never do and that is have a affair with a married man.

 

My ex husband is my X because he had a affair and I felt terriable because I could believe that he was having and affair. I will never forget the way I felt the day I found out. I said then that I never wanted to be the cause of another woman feeling that way. I am doing it. She doesn't know who I am but I am sure she knows there is someone else. He tells me that there marriage was in trouble before our relationship ever started. I don't know how to stop it. I know that it's wrong. But I need some advise...

[She's Come Undone]

I can't believe you didn't learn your lesson from your own failed marriage. Where was common sense, respect, dignity, all the things you expected from your own husband?

 

And so the cycle goes on...

[supermom]

No offense, but DUH! You KNOW the feeling that the wife IS GOING TO feel WHEN she finds out.

 

COME ON!!!!!!

 

WTF does marriage mean anymore??

 

LEAVE HIM

[Debster]

Right off the bat I will admit to being biased here.

 

Why am I biased? I know someone else who did the same thing. She was cheated on by her husband. She went through tons of counselling to deal with it. She then decided to be the OW to some MM. I lost so much respect for her and saw a selfish side to her that I couldn't be her friend anymore.

 

But you say you want advice, so here is mine.

 

 

He tells me that there marriage was in trouble before our relationship ever started. I don't know how to stop it. I know that it's wrong. But I need some advise...

Geez, if I had a nickel for every time I read that!

 

 

I will never forget the way I felt the day I found out.

I think you already did forget. Otherwise, why would you do something purposely to make someone else feel that way? It is like you are out for revenge. Only his wife did nothing to you.

 

I know that he will never leave his wife and that's O.K. I know he loves his wife very much.

If you know that and accept that then why are you asking for advice. Clearly you don't think it is ok or you can't deal with NOT being #1.

 

You've been carrying on an affair for three years. You know he loves his wife and will never leave her. But yet, you continue to sleep with this man and open your heart up to him. I think the advice you are really seeking is how you can stand to look at yourself in the mirror anymore.

[sweetlips]

Supermom,

 

No Offense Taken! You can't make me feel any worst then I already do. I do believe that marriage is a very special thing between to people. But something is wrong and was wrong with his marriage before I ever came back into his life. I am going to take your advise and call it off this weekend. Thanks....

[She's Come Undone]

Originally posted by sweetlips

I know he loves his wife very much.

 

 

How, how can he love his wife very much?? And do this to her??? That's not love, that's greed!

[sweetlips]

Thanks you! I get what your trying to say here. I really glad I came to this site for advise. I am going to stop this relationship. I don't think I have ever felt as stupid as you just made my feel. Post your dose of medicine to all woman that are doing what I did.

[She's Come Undone]

Originally posted by sweetlips

But something is wrong and was wrong with his marriage before I ever came back into his life. I am going to take your advise and call it off this weekend. Thanks....

 

 

First off I wish you much needed strength for this weekend, and applaud you if you go through with your pledge.

 

Second, EVERY MAN SAYS HIS MARRIAGE IS IN TROUBLE WHEN LOOKING FOR SOME EXTRA SEX...E-V-E-R-Y ONE!!! Unless you can prove it with the wife's side of the story, stop using it as an excuse to make YOU feel better about what YOU'RE doing!!!!!

 

But truly best of luck!

[laurabella]

I have been in a relationship with a guy for a little over three years now. He was my high school sweet heart. We did not see each other for over 20 years and I was divorced three years ago and we ran into each other. Well sparks flew and we have been seeing each other since.

 

The problem is he's married!!!! I know that he will never leave his wife and that's O.K. I know he loves his wife very much. He tells me all the time how much I mean to him and how much he wants to be with me. I just feel awefull about the relationship because I am doing what I said I would never do and that is have a affair with a married man.

 

My ex husband is my X because he had a affair and I felt terriable because I could believe that he was having and affair. I will never forget the way I felt the day I found out. I said then that I never wanted to be the cause of another woman feeling that way. I am doing it. She doesn't know who I am but I am sure she knows there is someone else. He tells me that there marriage was in trouble before our relationship ever started. I don't know how to stop it. I know that it's wrong. But I need some advise...

 

I understand how you feel.I am also dating a married man,i feel the same guilt you do.But at the same time I tell myself that if he was REALLY happy with his wife then he wouldnt be seeing me.I know that probably sounds crazy but i think its really true.I havent come straight out and asked him if he is still in love with his wife but by seeing them together it doesnt seem like it.Does your "man" tell you that he's going to leave his wife for you? I would love to be the only one with him but i knew he was married when we started seeing eachother so im not pushing the whole leaving thing,if he does,great,if he doesnt then i will just have to deal with it..but i wont stop seeing him,i cant...i think im falling in love!!