Falcon25 Posted March 11, 2012 Posted March 11, 2012 My other thread was full of people who made comments, but had very little reading comprehension skills. So here we go. In the other thread, we talked about how important not being emotional after a break up was. Let's talk about what makes women leave you on this one. There are two types of break ups. The one where a woman is crazy, tripping over the past, emotionally unavailable, in love with someone else, etc. These are things you have very little control over. Then, there is a second type, when a woman loses ATTRACTION to you. Here's some help. Do not spend every single day, moment, and time with the girl. You just met her, you have to spoon feed her. Go slow, you can never go too slow with women. Always be selfish. Don't be too nice. This doesn't mean you should be rude, cheat on her, etc. Just put YOURSELF first, women hate men that are BORING. To them, boring is the end of all things. They want to know that they can 1. lose you anytime 2. that other women desire you 3. that they have worked for your love Do not make the girl the center of your universe. Women are fickle, they can leave you anytime. Why would you put all your stocks on one thing? Don't do this. Even 20 year relationships fall apart, women are FICKLE. Remember that. Do not mix sex with emotions. Sex is good and all but you have to fuvk her mind, not her body. That means you have to wrap her heart and mind on you, thoughts of you, etc. You have to go slow and realize, just because she is sleeping with you, doesn't mean she loves you. DO NOT SAY I LOVE YOU all the time. THINK DON'T TALK. THINK DON'T TALK. The more you verbalize the more you will lose. If you always verbalize your feelings, you become the woman in the relationship. Let her earn it. Let her work for it. DO NOT BECOME EMOTIONAL. Don't let her see you mad. That is reserved for when she does something really bad. Do not become emotional and write her letters, poems, or anything. When you think you have been wronged, you let your ACTIONS do the talking. Not your feelings. Communication is NOT the key to a healthy relationship. The key to a healthy relationship IS A STRONG MAN. Remember that. A strong man who doesn't take shivt from anyone. That's what she desires. Women are the most loyal, loving creatures on earth. But they need a dominant, strong, healthy, and attractive man. In saying that, don't stop going to the gym, don't stop buying nice clothes, don't stop talking to other women. Don't cheat on her, she knows you can get other girls if you do all this. If you do this, you won't be in these forums, ever again. Do you understand?
broken-and-lost Posted March 11, 2012 Posted March 11, 2012 why do you write this stuff man? what happened to you? this stuff does not work trust me you are just setting yourself up for a big fall, you have some good points that yes you should not make one person the centre of your universe but the rest is very far from the mark and will not help people who are going through very rough times right now. here is a link to laws of attraction if you really believe in such things http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/second-chances/272674-getting-ex-back-laws-attraction
Cmac Posted March 11, 2012 Posted March 11, 2012 This is BS. One of the reasons things ended with my ex was because she thought I'd become uninterested in her. The whole "treat em mean, keep em keen" and related philosophies are nonsense. There's a very select few in this place who think they have ALL the answers and know everything there possibly is to know about relationships. If that's the case then why are they here in the first place? 1
Nancy B Posted March 11, 2012 Posted March 11, 2012 There are so many flaws in your rhetoric. Such rules simply cannot be applied to human relationships on a whole. Each person is different, each relationship has its own unique circumstances. 1
Author Falcon25 Posted March 12, 2012 Author Posted March 12, 2012 There are so many flaws in your rhetoric. Such rules simply cannot be applied to human relationships on a whole. Each person is different, each relationship has its own unique circumstances. This post is for men, not women. So move along little girl......
Author Falcon25 Posted March 12, 2012 Author Posted March 12, 2012 This is BS. One of the reasons things ended with my ex was because she thought I'd become uninterested in her. The whole "treat em mean, keep em keen" and related philosophies are nonsense. There's a very select few in this place who think they have ALL the answers and know everything there possibly is to know about relationships. If that's the case then why are they here in the first place? It's nonsense to you, but makes a lot of sense to others.
jus d'orange Posted March 12, 2012 Posted March 12, 2012 Everyone: Let's refuse to dignify Falcon with any more responses. His rudeness and arrogance are readily apparent; he isn't here to listen.
Author Falcon25 Posted March 12, 2012 Author Posted March 12, 2012 Everyone: Let's refuse to dignify Falcon with any more responses. His rudeness and arrogance are readily apparent; he isn't here to listen. This how you act in real life, Omega?
rAFC Posted March 12, 2012 Posted March 12, 2012 I don't know about the other commenters, but I agree with most of what Falcon25 has to say here. However, while I think being a MAN is the most important thing to remember (for men), in a long term relationship proper communication is also very important. Also, I agree that just because you are having sex with someone doesn't mean that they love you, but if you are consistently providing unsatisfying sex to your partner, chances are the relationship will also be unsatisfying for them!
ThatDudeXO Posted March 12, 2012 Posted March 12, 2012 Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. To not get dumped you must stay being the person they fell in love with. Whatever you did that made them fall in love with you everyday, if you don't then love fades away. Don't take them for granted.
patagonia Posted March 12, 2012 Posted March 12, 2012 The only problem I have with things like this or 'lists' is that we do these things or act a certain way to capture a woman's heart...and then it immediately changes when they are older or 'captured'. Married women and that list are completely and utterly opposite. No married person wants 'a person who they think they will lose'. Love isn't fear. I could go on... So in my opinion, even if it might be wrong, why play these schemes and go along with all of these 'treat yourself first' and 'don't be too available' games. Sure it might scare them off but you know what, in the end, I want a woman who can handle me putting HER first from the first date until our last dying breath and all of the other opposing attributes. Because at the end of the day, if a woman can't handle the real me and how she will be treated...well then, I will find one that can. Just my opinion of course
Author Falcon25 Posted March 12, 2012 Author Posted March 12, 2012 The only problem I have with things like this or 'lists' is that we do these things or act a certain way to capture a woman's heart...and then it immediately changes when they are older or 'captured'. Married women and that list are completely and utterly opposite. No married person wants 'a person who they think they will lose'. Love isn't fear. I could go on... So in my opinion, even if it might be wrong, why play these schemes and go along with all of these 'treat yourself first' and 'don't be too available' games. Sure it might scare them off but you know what, in the end, I want a woman who can handle me putting HER first from the first date until our last dying breath and all of the other opposing attributes. Because at the end of the day, if a woman can't handle the real me and how she will be treated...well then, I will find one that can. Just my opinion of course No, you won't find one who want "her to be put first". They don't like that. You will always have no good relationships. Because you are looking for something that doesn't exist. You are looking for a woman to act like the man. Good luck with that.
patagonia Posted March 12, 2012 Posted March 12, 2012 I'm pretty sure I'm not the cynical one here, but to each his own. And describe a 'good relationship'... I ask her to be the man if I am having her make all the decisions and being the strong tower. I however am not asking that when I treat her well. I think that's just pure genius. But again...just my opinion.
stimson554 Posted March 12, 2012 Posted March 12, 2012 Falcon this is complete and utter bull****, if this is what you really believe then i don't see you as a man at all, and im starting to think no one else here does either. none of what you stated makes a man a man. sure a woman wants a strong man but thats about the only thing you stated that is true. in my opinion, if you can't be loving or compassionate to a woman you are not a real man at all. the man your portraying is the arrogant douche with personal problems who always ends up alone. and honestly, this does sound like a personal problem, a problem of YOURS, i think you need the advice, and my advice to you is to be a real man and consider the advice of others, not spread your bull**** and dismiss everyone else when they try to call you out on your own twisted philosphy. a real man seeks to gain knowlege, not shove his own in the faces of others.
wilsonx Posted March 12, 2012 Posted March 12, 2012 Falcon this is complete and utter bull****, if this is what you really believe then i don't see you as a man at all, and im starting to think no one else here does either. none of what you stated makes a man a man. sure a woman wants a strong man but thats about the only thing you stated that is true. in my opinion, if you can't be loving or compassionate to a woman you are not a real man at all. the man your portraying is the arrogant douche with personal problems who always ends up alone. and honestly, this does sound like a personal problem, a problem of YOURS, i think you need the advice, and my advice to you is to be a real man and consider the advice of others, not spread your bull**** and dismiss everyone else when they try to call you out on your own twisted philosphy. a real man seeks to gain knowlege, not shove his own in the faces of others. You are about to eat your own words on this. You are shoving your own view in the face of others. Look at this from a different angle. He has a plan set out. His next step is to implement the plan. When it fails, he then tweaks the part that failed until it passes. When it all passes, he figured it out. We gain knowledge this way. The only way for a MAN to learn is to make a mistake and change our decision/thought process from that mistake 2
stimson554 Posted March 12, 2012 Posted March 12, 2012 (edited) i was merely stating my views, hes saying that we HAVE to follow this advice so that we don't fail in relationships, thats shoving, iwas merely asking him to consider my advice, but i am also considering your viewpoint because i am willing to listen unlike the person who made this thread. thanks anyways tho. Edited March 12, 2012 by stimson554
rAFC Posted March 12, 2012 Posted March 12, 2012 The only problem I have with things like this or 'lists' is that we do these things or act a certain way to capture a woman's heart...and then it immediately changes when they are older or 'captured'. Married women and that list are completely and utterly opposite. No married person wants 'a person who they think they will lose'. Love isn't fear. I could go on... No woman wants to marry a man who no other woman wants. If your woman begins to believe that you would have a difficult time finding another woman, she will lose attraction for you. The solution is not to cheat, or threaten to cheat, but just make sure you remain attractive to a wider audience of women. Your woman will appreciate you that much more knowing that she has the prize so many others can't have (a great guy!). So in my opinion, even if it might be wrong, why play these schemes and go along with all of these 'treat yourself first' and 'don't be too available' games. Sure it might scare them off but you know what, in the end, I want a woman who can handle me putting HER first from the first date until our last dying breath and all of the other opposing attributes. Because at the end of the day, if a woman can't handle the real me and how she will be treated...well then, I will find one that can. Ideally, you won't be playing games or coming up with schemes. To be the most attractive version of yourself, you should have passions and goals that came before, are more important than and do not revolve around your woman. Not only does this demonstrate a purpose in life, it also prevents you from becoming needy and overly available. Putting yourself first (unlike the way the op put it) is not about being selfish, it is about being the man you need to be in order to have a happy and fulfilling life.
jennisfora Posted March 12, 2012 Posted March 12, 2012 I know I am female, and therefore not supposed to post on this thread, lol, but I did want to say that from my experience, if you make the person the center of the universe, whether you are either gender, it almost always results in the other person leaving. No one wants to be the sole source of emotional support. Also, having been in a relationship where both of us did everything together...eventually things got stagnant. I think both people need to maintain some unique interests so there is something to contribute to the conversation besides work related things. I think having a life outside the relationship for both people is a good idea. On the other hand, my last bf was very romantic, and I loved it. I think saying don't say I love you, and don't write letters is absurd. I would probably think the guy wasn't that into me, and dump him after a while if he stayed aloof. Btw, my last bf dumped me. So, sending flowers, writing letters, saying I love you wasn't the problem.
gibson Posted March 12, 2012 Posted March 12, 2012 Although the OP is "misguided"... Let me tell you what he is trying to say / do with his posts: 1. Don't make a women your "God". 2. Don't look to her for your happiness. 3. Have life balance. 4. Have a sense of self. 5. Have desires, passions and goals and be working towards them (with or without a women). 6. Get your self-esteem, self-worth, identity, etc. from within. His "methods" suggested in this thread are an artificial way of trying to trick himself or the women into thinking he has those things listed above. Since they are not authentic and due to a women's "spidey sense", they will not work and blow up in your face. My advice if you feel the need to resort to "measures" to attract and keep women attracted... 1. Take a break from dating. 2. Invest the time, effort, energy and find yourself. 3. Fall in love with the person you find. 4. Fix your Life Balance (Work, Family, Friends, Hobbies, Health, Money, etc.). 5. Make some plans, goes and what it takes to achieve them and start working on them. 6. Ask a women to join you on your "adventure" instead of looking for her to be your "adventure" or tell you what your "adventure" is. 5
Author Falcon25 Posted March 12, 2012 Author Posted March 12, 2012 (edited) Guys, This is not being "shoved" in your face. In my years on this earth, and reading all these forums, I see two types of break ups. One, where you have little control of. You can't fix someone who is crazy, emotionally unavailable, etc. But you CAN control attraction. Most of these guys, especially young guys, lose the woman because they become the woman in the relationship. I am not saying you are not a man, if you are a romantic, I'm just saying you have to be a little reserved, a little unpredictable, a little independent, a little aloof. I NEVER advocated treating a woman like crap. I just don't want you to be the woman. Read all these forums. Most of the break ups are do to the girl losing that "feeling". Girls will not admit it, but they love a guy they can win, rather than "have". You don't have to take this advice, but if you do, I can guarantee that you will be dumped less in your life. Guarantee...... Edited March 12, 2012 by Falcon25 s
blindnowisee Posted March 12, 2012 Posted March 12, 2012 Amen Falcon. I feel the exact same way as you and you've worded it perfectly. We set the standard for the type of girl we're looking for however we seem to forget that we have to uphold our own standard as well. Be the alpha not the beta Be interesting not boring Be the hunted not the hunter
happyme Posted March 12, 2012 Posted March 12, 2012 Hello... female alert!!! Still, as this thread is about females I feel we are owed a 'voice' on it Falcon makes some valid points, imo. Nobody wants to be with a boring loser, right? However, there is a fine line. I like gibson's version better, as authenticity is paramount. Game playing, or faking it, can only ever be temporary. Re the fine line: strong, independent,attractive male = yes! On the other hand don't go too far... aloof, not committal, unromantic, unable to handle emotional talk, insensitivity = turn off! Yeah we women are difficult.... but that's my tuppence worth.
Author Falcon25 Posted March 12, 2012 Author Posted March 12, 2012 Amen Falcon. I feel the exact same way as you and you've worded it perfectly. We set the standard for the type of girl we're looking for however we seem to forget that we have to uphold our own standard as well. Be the alpha not the beta Be interesting not boring Be the hunted not the hunter If only these people knew what we know.......haha
Recommended Posts