HighFlight12 Posted March 11, 2012 Posted March 11, 2012 About 3 months ago my girl and I parted. I went to NC to visit her 6 days before Christmas, and we weren't getting along very well. She asked me not to come, but I insisted that I go because she had bought the ticket for me. I get there, things weren't so good. (I am a very reserved person, I don't have a lot of contact with people, besides work and school, other than that I'm to myself.)I tried and tried to be pleasing in her eyes and finally just came to the conclusion that I can't be anyone but me. The 2nd night I was there, I was doing my best to be nice, keep cool and be respectful, then out of no where, she says "I want you to leave". So I pack my bags and I leave. So about a hour later after I get to a hotel, she calls and says she wants me to come back, i stayed to myself the entire night. Next day while she is at work, she text me and says "pack your things I got you a plane ticket to go home, and i will need $140 dollars from you for your ticket home". So I say cool. At the airport, I felt i couldn't gather my thoughts, my feelings, I felt that I was falling with no parachute. Sad to say I tucked my head into my coat and I cried. I hadn't cried since I was 12, I am 26 now. After a week or so passes, I was still very angry, she calls, and I just lose it. I flipped and I cursed her out and I got the same from her. Finally I gave it a rest, i went a week without talking to her, things still didn't go any better, next i give it two weeks, things still didn't go any better, I give it a month, things started to seem a little better. Although I met someone, I didn't have sex with her, I couldn't do it. So the ex asked me had i been seeing someone, I was honest i said yes, but it was nothing serious, and I said i didn't have sex, and ever so gently, she says "you don't have to lie to me" I say I'm not lying. Then I ask her if she had, she said yes, but she not dealing with the person anymore. I say did yall have sex, she says shes not telling me. At first it bothered me, but I didn't let it get to me. Honestly the reason i didn't get upset is because, we parted over the summer, I messed with 2 women, so I basically felt, what goes around comes around. So last night we talked, and I pretty much told her, I still desire to work it out, she says she doesn't know. I say ok cool and i fall back, then she started being really disrespectful and cursing me, and I say I will never tolerate u ever disrespecting me anymore. Finally she calms down. Today we talked on the phone for a sec. She says let me call u back, so me being stupid, I say o u at homeboi house now, ight bet cool. Then she says don't do that, I say ok bye. Then she calls back and says, i really don't like that, I am not with him and I told u im not talking to him anymore. I say ok, she says text me. So I let her know that I want to be where she is, and that things can be better if she gives it a chance. And i told her we have come to far to let things tear us apart. She says "babe Idk". Enough of the talk, but what i really want to know, is do I stay around or do I fall back? I personally believe that i have been nothing but good to her, i've always been there completely for her, no half stepping, i've endured everything with this woman, when we were together for 3 years, she never had to worry about me cheating, sneaking behind her back with other woman, although she always thought i did. I feel if she hasn't realized what was in front of her, almost 3 months have passed, I don't really believe she will realize. Do I stick around, or do I fall back? BTW. I am pretty much a quiet kinda guy, I find it hard to just be myself often, I mean I don't go outta my way to fit in or anything, I'm not very sociable unless I am completely comfortable around a person whether it be my girl or a friend. -P.S I decided to fall back and let it work the way it suppose to starting tonight.
stimson554 Posted March 11, 2012 Posted March 11, 2012 She is obviously very insecure, Unfortunately the best thing for you to do right now is put her behind you and try to move on, not much can be done about people with insecurities of that level but to just let them find their own path, they are self destructive and often repeat healthy relationships that eventually lead to ruin, they don't want a good guy, but they also don't want a bad guy, they are kind of stuck in a rut and haven't fully decided what is is that they want. so yeah i would advise to try and move on as best you can, and try to avoid any contact with this person, at least for the time being. best of luck to you.
Author HighFlight12 Posted March 11, 2012 Author Posted March 11, 2012 That's pretty much all I can do, I've been reading a lot of stuff on here, and it's made me feel pretty good about my situation. I'm not really hurt over the situation anymore, i just hate to see something great go to waste. I've acknowledged that a woman will most likely never admit her insecurities. When she moves on to someone different and it turns out to be a failure, i will not be around to pick up the broken pieces. My biggest obstacle is letting people go, and this is a experience to grow stronger, and to also learn from my mistakes as well as hers. Thanks for the advice, ppreciate it!
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