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Girl who I haven't talked to all week thought she could call tonight and ask to meet?

PhillyDude

By PhillyDude
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dispatch3d Established Member

dispatch3d

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god i just never care about the stuff you flip out about. I don't get it.

leftfordead2 Established Member

leftfordead2

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"So how's that job search coming along?"

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PhillyDude Established Member

PhillyDude

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"So how's that job search coming along?"

 

I like being on unemployment and will stay on it for 99 weeks

2sunny Established Member

2sunny

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I like being on unemployment and will stay on it for 99 weeks

 

So we all employed folks pay for you to try not to work at all. That's backwards!

leftfordead2 Established Member

leftfordead2

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What a waste of living and breathing space...

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PhillyDude Established Member

PhillyDude

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What a waste of living and breathing space...

 

Don't get reported, watch your langiuage

FitChick Established Member

FitChick

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My guess is that her date cancelled at the last minute and she already had her hair cut and bought a nice outfit to wear that she didn't want to go to waste.

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PhillyDude Established Member

PhillyDude

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My guess is that her date cancelled at the last minute and she already had her hair cut and bought a nice outfit to wear that she didn't want to go to waste.

 

Exactly...LOL I would have looked like a NEW FOOL walking out my door to meet her tonight

johan Established Member

johan

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Don't get reported, watch your langiuage

 

You must have thought he was talking about you.

 

Oops!

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dreamingoftigers Established Member

dreamingoftigers

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I've gone out on a last minute date.

 

It really depends what else I have going on. It isn't a big deal if all I had planned was the dishes and some organizing.

 

I try not to live life by some artificial "dating rules" and have fun on my own terms.

 

My husband and I are both planners and spontaneous. I'd rather that then everything be OCD.

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PhillyDude Established Member

PhillyDude

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I've gone out on a last minute date.

 

It really depends what else I have going on. It isn't a big deal if all I had planned was the dishes and some organizing.

 

I try not to live life by some artificial "dating rules" and have fun on my own terms.

 

My husband and I are both planners and spontaneous. I'd rather that then everything be OCD.

 

Well I;m not a spontaneous person and like to plan a little.

Els Established Member

Els

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Oh, how dare she. :) You should definitely leave her alone, teach her a lesson she'll never forget! ;)

PlumPrincess Established Member

PlumPrincess

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Keep in mind I'm talking about a 1st meet and greet not someone I already know. I would have to shave and figure out what to wear and I didn't feel like going through all that tonight. I told her I need 24 hrs notice

In the beginning of my online dating career I did it all the time. I contacted guys on short notice, a couple of hours before, sometimes just an hour before when I saw they were online. I figured, "I'm bored and I want to go out. I might as well go out and meet someone and see how it goes." Honestly, even if I had been second choice, if I really didn't have anything to do at that time, I still would go out, just for practicing. And in this case, I would let him pay for the date, even when I usually pay for myself. Just to get my ego stroke for the day. :)

 

Update: These were all first dates. If I'm interested and a guy would do that after we had met, I would think I'm second best and then I'd say no.

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PhillyDude Established Member

PhillyDude

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In the beginning of my online dating career I did it all the time. I contacted guys on short notice, a couple of hours before, sometimes just an hour before when I saw they were online. I figured, "I'm bored and I want to go out. I might as well go out and meet someone and see how it goes." Honestly, even if I had been second choice, if I really didn't have anything to do at that time, I still would go out, just for practicing. And in this case, I would let him pay for the date, even when I usually pay for myself. Just to get my ego stroke for the day. :)

 

Update: These were all first dates. If I'm interested and a guy would do that after we had met, I would think I'm second best and then I'd say no.

 

I would never go out with someone because they are BORED. And that's exactly why she called me on such short notice. Again, if she was willing to have a INDOOR DATE then I would have been all for that.

RedRobin Established Member

RedRobin

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Hmm... would you tell a job prospect that you need 24 hours to meet?

 

I dunno. Sounds like you are way overthinking this. I'm not a fan of the chess-move style of dating.

 

They call, if I am free (or at least cheap, ha ha), and think I will have a good time, why not? What do you do with friends? Do you give them the same convoluted BS? ooo! I wouldn't want my friends, potential date or anyone else to think

 

I'M SINGLE AND AVAILABLE

 

who knew??

 

On the other hand, if they can't return the favor... if it looks like their style is always to do things spur of the moment with no reciprocation on the last-minute-ness, yea, that would be annoying. But you are just getting to know this person. Would it have killed you to go out?

 

Edited: I keep forgetting that men are expected to pay. That might change things for me if I were a guy and the girl called last minute. Hmmm.. Well, I always offer to split the bill, so guys have nothing to worry about from me.

 

and I don't go out with ANYONE because I'm bored. Friend or potential date. That would be disrespectful to them. I'm rarely bored anyway.

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johan Established Member

johan

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Spontaneity is a good thing. If a friend or a girl I liked called me up to do something, I'd go. Or if I had something else going on, I would invite them. Or we could invent something to do and meet up.

 

I used to call women up like that all the time. They were almost always up for it, because it was going to be an adventure of some sort.

 

If someone expressed an interest in hanging out with me, it definitely wouldn't get on my nerves.

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PhillyDude Established Member

PhillyDude

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Hmm... would you tell a job prospect that you need 24 hours to meet?

 

I dunno. Sounds like you are way overthinking this. I'm not a fan of the chess-move style of dating.

 

They call, if I am free (or at least cheap, ha ha), and think I will have a good time, why not? What do you do with friends? Do you give them the same convoluted BS? ooo! I wouldn't want my friends, potential date or anyone else to think

 

I'M SINGLE AND AVAILABLE

 

who knew??

 

On the other hand, if they can't return the favor... if it looks like their style is always to do things spur of the moment with no reciprocation on the last-minute-ness, yea, that would be annoying. But you are just getting to know this person. Would it have killed you to go out?

 

Edited: I keep forgetting that men are expected to pay. That might change things for me if I were a guy and the girl called last minute. Hmmm.. Well, I always offer to split the bill, so guys have nothing to worry about from me.

 

and I don't go out with ANYONE because I'm bored. Friend or potential date. That would be disrespectful to them. I'm rarely bored anyway.

 

What company is going to ask to interview the same day? And if they did it would show no consideration on their part and would give off a unprofessional vibe.

carhill Established Member

carhill

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OP, try something next time...if you feel like going out, without regard to and/or prejudice concerning the lady in question, do that. If you don't feel like it, do that. It's OK to make a choice based on the question without assigning motives, presumptions, and other various 'scenarios' to the dynamic. Go or no go. See how it goes.

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PhillyDude Established Member

PhillyDude

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OP, try something next time...if you feel like going out, without regard to and/or prejudice concerning the lady in question, do that. If you don't feel like it, do that. It's OK to make a choice based on the question without assigning motives, presumptions, and other various 'scenarios' to the dynamic. Go or no go. See how it goes.

 

I guess I should know in the future when a female is calling me at 6pm on a saturday night it's defintely not to talk on the phone-lol

 

I normally don't call woman on friday or saturday unless I'm confirming a date we set up.

carhill Established Member

carhill

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Another way to look at it is, if she's asking you to 'hang out', she invited you so it's Dutch or she pays, just like if a friend 'asks you out'. An added bonus, if you're otherwise available, is you can perhaps have a good time with her and maybe meet someone else along the way. IMO, this is the essence of being single. Freedom and choice. She chose to call you. Make your choice.

 

I remember back in my 20's and 30's I'd feel used and abused by such actions but at some point I started seeing them as opportunities; positive potentials. Life (dating life) became more fun instead of an often frustrating game. The circumstances remained relatively constant but my perception of them changed. That might not be your path but a potential worth contemplating anyway.

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PhillyDude Established Member

PhillyDude

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Another way to look at it is, if she's asking you to 'hang out', she invited you so it's Dutch or she pays, just like if a friend 'asks you out'. An added bonus, if you're otherwise available, is you can perhaps have a good time with her and maybe meet someone else along the way. IMO, this is the essence of being single. Freedom and choice. She chose to call you. Make your choice.

 

I remember back in my 20's and 30's I'd feel used and abused by such actions but at some point I started seeing them as opportunities; positive potentials. Life (dating life) became more fun instead of an often frustrating game. The circumstances remained relatively constant but my perception of them changed. That might not be your path but a potential worth contemplating anyway.

 

 

Well that was another reason because I wasn't sure if I was expected to pay and last night I was not in a spending mood

Mme. Chaucer Established Member

Mme. Chaucer

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I would never go out with someone because they are BORED. And that's exactly why she called me on such short notice. Again, if she was willing to have a INDOOR DATE then I would have been all for that.

 

Why do you take it as a personal insult that a stranger from a dating site may have had nothing to do and even have felt bored, and then thought something like, "hey! Maybe PhillyDude is free and we could meet! He sounded cool ;), and maybe it will be fun!"

 

What's wrong with that?

 

What if some guy you know had nothing else going on and called you to go have a beer with him? Would that have got you all indignant too?

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PhillyDude Established Member

PhillyDude

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Why do you take it as a personal insult that a stranger from a dating site may have had nothing to do and even have felt bored, and then thought something like, "hey! Maybe PhillyDude is free and we could meet! He sounded cool ;), and maybe it will be fun!"

 

What's wrong with that?

 

What if some guy you know had nothing else going on and called you to go have a beer with him? Would that have got you all indignant too?

 

That's not the same thing because the guy would be someone I already know and I would be paying for myself

Mme. Chaucer Established Member

Mme. Chaucer

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I did a lot of online dating. That's how I met my husband. Every first meeting was dutch. Except the meeting with my husband, but that had extenuating circumstances.

 

Why don't you do dutch for first meetings, since you don't wish to pay?

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PhillyDude Established Member

PhillyDude

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I did a lot of online dating. That's how I met my husband. Every first meeting was dutch. Except the meeting with my husband, but that had extenuating circumstances.

 

Why don't you do dutch for first meetings, since you don't wish to pay?

 

It depends on the situation.

 

If I go to jersey to meet someone I usually pay with no problem because she picks me up from the train station

 

If a girl drives to my part of town which is downtown philly I will pay with no problem since she spend money on gas and parking

 

But since me and this girl live 5 mins from each other, we defintely should be going dutch whenever we do meet

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