ls32ssibm Posted March 10, 2012 Posted March 10, 2012 Was just doing some thinking today as how we, as people, partake in certain relationships. I guess I am a supermarket philosopher or whatever. I am a 23 year old male, to put a few things in perspective. Exhibit A) Me and my best friend (a guy), of 10 years now. We have one or two falling outs in our teens, but to this day are best friends despite the fact we currently live in different states. We contact each other almost daily, if not a few times a week. He is someone who I know will always be there for me, and vice versa. We do have our differences, but it doesn't matter anymore, we've "outgrown" that crap the best we could. Exhibit B) Me and my last girlfriend. I loved her more than anything, and sometimes I can't get her sweet love letters (from when I was on military duty) with her scent on them out of my mind. We had a great time together, and so on. Anyway, now she hates me, blocked me on Facebook, and absolutely will not talk to me. I guess I'm lucky to have learned so young who the most important people are in your life, long story short.
Raya1234 Posted March 10, 2012 Posted March 10, 2012 well, don't you think relationships demand more? I mean, as a best friend, all you ask is that the person do their best and forgive them for their flaws because you don't have to live with them constantly. That's why our friends are so important. But go into any true, deeper relationship existence, be it family or an intimate partner, it's complicated! I'm not saying your ex didn't react inappropriately, perhaps she reacted terribly. It's just that this is the problem with having the "friend" at a distance with whom we compare our relationships to. It's a quality of relation that will not directly translate the same in an intimate partnership, thus a perfect comparison set for measurement. But it is false. Friends are our friends for a reason, and if we do choose to take it further, we can't expect things to stay as they have been. More expectations will inherently ensue that will cause us to look differently at the person.
TaraMaiden Posted March 10, 2012 Posted March 10, 2012 Exhibit A) Me and my best friend (a guy), of 10 years now. We have one or two falling outs in our teens, but to this day are best friends despite the fact we currently live in different states. We contact each other almost daily, if not a few times a week. He is someone who I know will always be there for me, and vice versa. We do have our differences, but it doesn't matter anymore, we've "outgrown" that crap the best we could. Pretty much the same goes for me and my dog..... so i can equate to an extent..... Exhibit B) Me and my last girlfriend. I loved her more than anything, and sometimes I can't get her sweet love letters (from when I was on military duty) with her scent on them out of my mind. We had a great time together, and so on. Anyway, now she hates me, blocked me on Facebook, and absolutely will not talk to me. Not enough info.... too one sided. were you completely and utterly blameless? What made her do the 180? Was - and is - it all her fault? Is she the only flawed one in the dynamic, then? I guess I'm lucky to have learned so young who the most important people are in your life, long story short. If you're still young, you're sure to change your mind again, at some point... and maybe back again, now and then.... See, my point is, nothing ever stays the same....
carhill Posted March 10, 2012 Posted March 10, 2012 Exhibit B never would have been a friend if not a girlfriend. That's it.
hotloader Posted March 10, 2012 Posted March 10, 2012 I guess I'm lucky to have learned so young who the most important people are in your life, long story short. You haven't learned yet. It'll take another decade or so for you to finally have your eyes opened. You'll rationalize it when the next girl comes along and you fall madly in love. Then she'll throw you away like an old pair of shoes, and you'll be right back where you are right now, with all the affirmations and "I've learned my lesson" rhetoric. You'll repeat this process for at least the next ten years, because it's totally natural for you to do so. Eventually your eyes will be open, but it's not happening anytime soon. Try to enjoy yourself in the meantime, and for God's sake don't do anything stupid like get married or have a child with one of these women.
TaraMaiden Posted March 10, 2012 Posted March 10, 2012 Exhibit B never would have been a friend if not a girlfriend. That's it. Ar-men to that... You haven't learned yet. ...... and for God's sake don't do anything stupid like get married or have a child with one of these women. And ditto-dee-doodery-doo, with sprinklin's....
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