Why do you think there is such a prevalence of women who fake their orgasms?

[Disenchantedly Yours]

Meh, Im not in the mood. Sorry...the porn topic and anything related has lost its fancy on me.

 

 

Again, I addressed more then just porn. I think you frankly can't argue the points I brought up.

[kaylan]

Again, I addressed more then just porn. I think you frankly can't argue the points I brought up.

Whatever you say.

 

Im not going to waste my time arguing in circles because thats what always happen with you and sexual topics. I think myself and other posters can agree that it becomes tedious and pointless to engage in a debate with you regarding men and how they view sex. Especially when it has to do with porn.

 

Nice attempt at trying to bait me into responding to your previous post by claiming that I cant argue your points. Trust me, I could easily do so, and have done so in the past when speaking with you. I just choose not to do so this time.

[mesmerized]

I'm much less threatened by porn than I am by the usual media description of perfection. Men don't have to see porn to develop those ideals.

 

Also, porn makes men insecure too. A lot of men are insecure about their penis size. I once complimented a guy's body in porn and the guy I was with was not happy about it lol Later he was fishing for compliments from me.

[Forever Learning]

In answer to the title of the OP, I've always likened it to the answer a man typically gives his wife/lover when she asks him if her ass is fat.

 

In this case, while a white lie, her answer pleases him. Even while pleasing him, it can also be an impetus to trying different things in lovemaking which bring the white lie to truth, meaning activities which bring her a 'go to' place where genuine orgasms are felt with confidence. Everything is a choice.

 

Bingo! Well done as usual.

[FitChick]

It takes me 20-30 minutes to orgasm using a shower head for clitoral masturbation. Imagine a man with half the power, and doing it for twice the time?

 

That's why you need to experiment with vibrators meant for the task. A showerhead is for bathing. You might be surprised at how many men like vibrators used on them.

 

There is one type that professional masseurs use that is like a chrome motor that you strap on the back of your hand. It vibrates your hand but your hand does the massaging, so it's a skin on skin experience. You can start out with a regular full body massage, which everybody likes, and then get more (ahem) personal. I can't see a man objecting to this type of device, unlike those silly battery operated penis things.

[FrustratedStandards]

Again, I addressed more then just porn. I think you frankly can't argue the points I brought up.

 

Yup. That's why absolutely everything I ever mention in his posts is refuted by completely unrelated information. LOL

 

That's why you need to experiment with vibrators meant for the task. A showerhead is for bathing. You might be surprised at how many men like vibrators used on them.

 

There is one type that professional masseurs use that is like a chrome motor that you strap on the back of your hand. It vibrates your hand but your hand does the massaging, so it's a skin on skin experience. You can start out with a regular full body massage, which everybody likes, and then get more (ahem) personal. I can't see a man objecting to this type of device, unlike those silly battery operated penis things.

 

I have introduced vibrators into the bedroom and shown men how I like them used. Often times they overstimulate or understimulate, it's not easy even for myself to find that right spot. Once I do find it, I enjoy myself but since it takes so long they think its not working, and proceed to change positions/angles or try something else like oral or penetration.

 

They just jump around the place trying everything they can in hopes I will come, but that's just distracting and turns me off.

 

Overall, the sex has gotten better when I express myself more in the bedroom (in terms of what i like/don't like) but altogether, I still have never orgasmed with a man. That having been said, I don't always orgasm during masturbation (about 80% of the time I do).

 

That just makes me wonder if i'm one of those women who have an extremely difficult time orgasming.

[kaylan]

Yup. That's why absolutely everything I ever mention in his posts is refuted by completely unrelated information. LOL

Well excuse me.

 

Dont blame me because you fail to grasp my arguments. You just get upset that I dont appease you with any agreement.

 

Posters here have learned to not have back and forths with DY because of her one way and incorrect view of how men see sex and women. There are certain topics Ive learned to stay away from with certain posters. We all end up talking in circles.

 

I know better than to get into convos about media, porn, and male views on sexuality with DY and Verhzn. Im also learned not to get into convos with somedude about a mans dating troubles.

 

Its the same recycled points from other threads. She can say she mentioned different things, when in reality shes making the SAME EXACT arguments shes made in past related threads.

 

Its futile to even engage in such discourse with her.

Edited March 11, 2012 by kaylan

[kaylan]

And just to steer the convo in a new direction...have any of you ladies ever experimented to the so called "deep spot"? From reading stuff online and hearing women talk about it on Youtube, it seems rather promising.

 

The only time I got to fiddle around way up there with my was with my ex. We practiced enough to the point that she was really getting somewhere before my hand cramped up bad. She never got to the finish line, but her reactions seemed more intense than any other oral and manual methods we used.

 

Shes the only chick Ive ever tried that with, and I refrain from doing that with girls I dont know well. I dunno but I get scared that they may wonder why the hell Im sticking my middle finger all the way near their cervix....hehe.

 

What say you? (and should I create a new thread for this?...I dont think itd fit in the dating forum though)

[FrustratedStandards]

You are like a fly that just won't go away. No one on here is responding to you because they aren't interested in your childish comments. You can stop talking now.

 

I feel ridiculous even having to tell you this. It's obvious to everyone except you.

[kaylan]

You are like a fly that just won't go away. No one on here is responding to you because they aren't interested in your childish comments. You can stop talking now.

 

I feel ridiculous even having to tell you this. It's obvious to everyone except you.

Awww....look...shes upset...how cute.

 

Anyways...back to my last post...

 

And just to steer the convo in a new direction...have any of you ladies ever experimented to the so called "deep spot"? From reading stuff online and hearing women talk about it on Youtube, it seems rather promising.

 

The only time I got to fiddle around way up there with my was with my ex. We practiced enough to the point that she was really getting somewhere before my hand cramped up bad. She never got to the finish line, but her reactions seemed more intense than any other oral and manual methods we used.

 

Shes the only chick Ive ever tried that with, and I refrain from doing that with girls I dont know well. I dunno but I get scared that they may wonder why the hell Im sticking my middle finger all the way near their cervix....hehe.

 

What say you? (and should I create a new thread for this?...I dont think itd fit in the dating forum though)

[The Blue Knight]

Women are thinking about their partner's self esteem during sex? Maybe that is why they aren't having orgasms I'd advise less thinking during sex. Thinking is like orgasm kryptonite.

 

Two reasons a woman might vocalize more gearing up to, and during, his orgasm:

 

1. He's thrusting harder and faster. It feels good.

2. His excitement and orgasm is a turn on.

Good point. Sex shouldn't be about thinking so much. Just enjoying and relaxing.

[The Blue Knight]

Well that's all been true for me. Like I said, I was more worried about him and his pleasure then my own. When I was really young and discovered men had this thing called "porn", I would copy the girls and try to learn to moan like them. It wasn't until years later when an ex boyfriend really enthusastically complimented me on that skill did it hit me what I did to try to fit into a more idealized male driven fantasy. Some moans where mine but some where also made just to make him more excited. I wonder how many younger women fall into that same vortex where they try to act like what they see men like. This is why men need to be careful about the expectations and things they idolize about women. If men want real women with real experiences, then they need to support that. If men want fake women with fake fantasies, then that's what they will support. I know mos men don't think they have a responsiblity in this regard, but htey do. Just as I have a responsiblity about what I support in the media that sends messages about men. Do I support the negative stuff, or the positive stuff. That lets men be more of who hey are with me.

The porn industry has really put an unwarranted burden on women and unfortunately, many of my shared-gender brainless colleagues are stupid enough to confuse real life women with pornography fantasies.

 

I believe in the First Amendment and free speech, but I wonder how much things like pornography really set us back as a society. There are those who will say that porn is liberating. I think it's been destructive overall. Just my two cents on the subject.

[Badsingularity]

Haha...you totally get us guys.

 

 

xxoo does seem to have a good understanding of how men work and I don't think its any coincidence that she's so happy in her relationship with her husband.

 

A chick who understands guys is super attractive..

 

big time

[The Blue Knight]

On a logical level we ALL know porn is fake. That doesn't mean men stop rseponding to the fake fantasy and aren't infact sexually titilated by it or that they don't infact ask, or simply do things like they see them done in porn.

 

I am telling you, before porn was a rampet as it was, I didn't have guys just automatically doing the stuff that some of my ex boyfriends tried to do more recently. Porn does change male behavior and male thoughts. Infact, there are studies that oftne talk about how much more disatisfied men feel and are more critical of their own partners after viewing porn of other women.

 

Have you slept with other dudes to know this? i have slept with dudes and have seen a shift in men's sexual attitudes and how they approach sex. Men want more pornified sex. They don't want women to be real or just themselves.

 

This is the reality a lot of guys don't want to face. But it's not the reality I have experienced in my experiences with men. Porn does infact change men. It has changed men. And not for the better.

 

Amen sister. Pornography has created an new appetite in men that perhaps didn't exist in widespread fashion until porn became so readily available on the privacy of your computer. When I see so many married women posting about their husbands losing interest in them sexually, I can't help but wonder if this (among other things) doesn't play at least a part? Perhaps sex with their wives in a standard missionary position (or some other basic positions) offers no excitement for them because they've reached a point where they just need something more . . . almost like a gateway drug is perfectly fine to begin with, but later, you need something stronger and more pronounced in order to get the same level of satisfaction and excitement.

[The Blue Knight]

Im sorry, but how is 71 women localized in one small area, in ANY way indicative of the sexual behavior of all women.

 

Bull crap study. This is the best you could find? There are way more expansive studies out there that have much larger sample sizes, age analysis, and pick women from different backgrounds, racial groups, etc.

 

Come on now...71 women....lmao

Don't shoot the messenger pal. The article just came out and I shared it with this thread. Nothing more.

[threebyfate]

Unlike cars, women who have Ferrari looks don't always have Ferrari handling.

 

And maybe, with experience, guys learn that the women who pay the most attention to appearances tend to handle like a mini cooper

Don't be knocking the Cooper S. It's still a BMW. Good stuff for not much money.

[The Blue Knight]

Porn has made it worse for women because men think this is how a woman is supposed to react.

 

Exactly

!!!

[ScienceGal]

(Unrelating it to myself and my situation)

 

Do you think it's because men have gotten worse over the years? Or could it be that our expectations in a partner are too high?

 

Is it that media portrays it as something that it's not? Or are women just too uncomfortable in their own skin (perhaps also due to media) to allow this to happen?

 

I would have thought that the opposite would happen given that there is so much more emphasis on the female orgasm than ever before. Yet somehow, this isn't reducing the prevalence of the fake orgasm.

 

I also think is has to do with age (young fake more, older fake less) but if this was the case, wouldn't fake orgasms only be popular among the young adults and not women all across the age groups?

 

I've never faked an orgasm, but I have been more vocal in order to enhance my partners climax. And that's not faking either, as I am enjoying it and it does feel really good.

 

For me, if the relationship is too new, I can't relax enough to orgasm. I don't care how hot he is or how turned on I am. It's a trust and comfort level that comes in time (no pun intended ). I've told partners this and they've all understood. Through developing other non-physical aspects of the relationship that problem remedies itself.

 

I think if someone is worried their partner is faking it, they should address it, and perhaps communication within the relationship overall.

[The Blue Knight]

That's the thing. I tell them what I want, and they do it, and it's nice, but then they get tired. It takes me 20-30 minutes to orgasm using a shower head for clitoral masturbation. Imagine a man with half the power, and doing it for twice the time?

 

Not gonna happen lol

 

Girly Men

[kaylan]

Don't shoot the messenger pal. The article just came out and I shared it with this thread. Nothing more.

I was attacking the validity of the study. My bad bro. Its all good.

 

Girly Men

I lol'd

[The Blue Knight]

Don't be knocking the Cooper S. It's still a BMW. Good stuff for not much money.

Yeah, if you like a coffin-sized death trap on wheels.

[threebyfate]

Yeah, if you like a coffin-sized death trap on wheels.

2012 Mini Cooper Safety | U.S. News Best Cars

 

The federal government has tested the 2012 Cooper, but only for rollover risk. The Cooper receives the highest marks in this area of five out of five stars.

 

In tests with the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety, the 2012 Mini Cooper receives the highest score of “Good” in front and rear crash tests, but receives a lower score of “Acceptable” in side crash tests and for roof strength.

Might want to learn something, prior to assuming.

[threebyfate]

Yeah, if you like a coffin-sized death trap on wheels.

The federal government has tested the 2012 Cooper, but only for rollover risk. The Cooper receives the highest marks in this area of five out of five stars.

 

In tests with the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety, the 2012 Mini Cooper receives the highest score of “Good” in front and rear crash tests, but receives a lower score of “Acceptable” in side crash tests and for roof strength.

Reconsider your stance.

[threebyfate]

Yeah, if you like a coffin-sized death trap on wheels.

Google "2012 Mini Cooper Safety Ratings" and you'll find this answer:

 

The federal government has tested the 2012 Cooper, but only for rollover risk. The Cooper receives the highest marks in this area of five out of five stars.

 

In tests with the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety, the 2012 Mini Cooper receives the highest score of “Good” in front and rear crash tests, but receives a lower score of “Acceptable” in side crash tests and for roof strength.

For some reason, the LS site has rejected the link, twice.

[kaylan]

^Yeah Id be more concerned about smart cars than with Mini Coopers