alexa137 Posted March 8, 2012 Posted March 8, 2012 how do you forgot about someone who care and love? especially if they keep hurting you? its too hard! i think about this person at least 10 times a day! yes i know times heal all wounds but its so annoying and frustrating! oh god i wish someone would hit me in the head so i can forget the past 9 months! ugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!
nick d Posted March 8, 2012 Posted March 8, 2012 Unfortunately you will NEVER forget.. Through time the memories will become distant though. I too think about my ex at least 100 times a day.. I haven't seen her in 6 weeks after seeing her and living with her everyday for 3 years.. It hurts but going NO CONTACT is really the only way to heal! It's hard and it hurts, but you have to move on.
Linda Lee Posted March 8, 2012 Posted March 8, 2012 The truth is that we don't forget we simply get used to it. Memories are the food of broken hearts, the more we relate to the past and forget the present moments, the more it becomes difficult to forget. It is really important to not sacrifice the present for the past. 2
Philosoraptor Posted March 8, 2012 Posted March 8, 2012 The goal isn't to forget, it's to find acceptance and peace with the situation. Trying to forget is just a path of avoidance that uses energy that could be spent truly healing. You'd be surprised how much you forget once you have found that peace. 1
Mr Scorpio Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 As others have mentioned, you never really forgot. Even if you do manage to not think about a particular memory, you can count on the world giving you a trigger that will dig-up the memory. I've been separated from my ex for 18 months and I still think of her dozens of times a day. Waves from the past will come crashing in, but they will also recede back out into the vast void. 1
BewitchedandBothered Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 how do you forgot about someone who care and love? especially if they keep hurting you? its too hard! i think about this person at least 10 times a day! yes i know times heal all wounds but its so annoying and frustrating! oh god i wish someone would hit me in the head so i can forget the past 9 months! ugh!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ask yourself what it is you love so much about a person who keeps hurting you? Are you sure it is love? If this is a fresh breakup of course you will have them on the brain most of the day, but eventually you will start healing and they will just be an afterthought.
ThatDudeXO Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 As others have mentioned, you never really forgot. Even if you do manage to not think about a particular memory, you can count on the world giving you a trigger that will dig-up the memory. I've been separated from my ex for 18 months and I still think of her dozens of times a day. Waves from the past will come crashing in, but they will also recede back out into the vast void. This doesn't make optimistic about healing. You say you still think about her 12 times a day, 18 months on? When you think about your ex, do you still feel pain? I felt fine after 2 weeks of NC but I saw an old text from a friend regarding my ex (at the time she was my gf) and it reminded me of how happy were together. I swear I feel like I'm healing and them something triggers a memory to cause me more pain. 1
radiodarcy Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 as other posters have already said you don't forget. in fact, the key to moving on is accepting the fact that you won't forget. you just take it day by day - - experience the pain of letting go and know that it is temporary and it will get better.
tornangel Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 My easiest way of me trying t heal is by accepting we werent meant for one another. And my focus now is on me getting healthy again. I dont try not to think about him, but I try to see reality of how it really was now. Not sugar coat stuff into what I wanted it to be. I think people do this alot. Second guess themselves.
TheUnthoughtKnown Posted March 10, 2012 Posted March 10, 2012 Don't think there's much I can say that hasn't already been said so I suppose I'll reiterate it - forgetting isn't really an option. Somewhere in your mind you'll think about your ex. I'm 23 months broken up and have had 3 relationships in that time, but not to the degree I had with her so my mind will always go back to her occasionally. It's just something I've learned to control, even use to motivate me. It's really all about controlling the emotion and not letting it take control of you. It may not mean much right now but honestly, walk away and don't look back. You'll see what we mean.
Mr Scorpio Posted March 10, 2012 Posted March 10, 2012 This doesn't make optimistic about healing. You say you still think about her 12 times a day, 18 months on? When you think about your ex, do you still feel pain? I felt fine after 2 weeks of NC but I saw an old text from a friend regarding my ex (at the time she was my gf) and it reminded me of how happy were together. I swear I feel like I'm healing and them something triggers a memory to cause me more pain. A dozen times might be a slight exageration, but the world is full of triggers. But no, it doesn't hurt when the thoughts spring-up. There is a difference between a memory briefly crossing your mind, and allowing yourself to dwell on things.
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