Kamille Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 You're on the wrong thread. But please don't go there and bash that girl. She is on serious medications for a serious condition that mess with a person's metabolism very badly. It will take time and a lot of determination to figure out how to lose and maintain a healthy weight while taking those drugs. Oh no! I didn't realize, when I wrote earlier, that the poster was indeed referring to a real thread. (I made my comment in jest - and quickly, in between meetings).
mesmerized Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 Leigh, I am not arguing; that's attractive, but there are also guys who like women that sit and write poetry all day and spend their evenings listening to obscure folk rock bands in tiny night clubs, and who have the complexion of a vampire. Or women who have soft and squishy looking voluptuous bodies like Marilyn Monroe who wear glam makeup and wouldn't be caught dead running or in a gym. LOTS of guys. If you aren't a blond, tan, "skinny" gym girl type, please don't feel obliged to try to be that. Personally, I'd never, though I certainly appreciate the beauty of women who do look like that. Look the way you look and feel your best. And do it in good health. Not EVERYBODY needs to buy into the image of "perfection" that is being spoon fed to us all the time. Those guys who are ok with a woman who never ever exercises often are guys who aren't very sexually attractive. Personally, I only date/have sex with athletic men and I know that I have to get off my bum and exercise if I want to keep their interest. Thankfully, I'm still considered sexually attractive to men even tho I'm not a skinny little thing.
Mme. Chaucer Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 Those guys who are ok with a woman who never ever exercises often are guys who aren't very sexually attractive. Not in my heyday. I was in a pretty intense and exciting music scene in a wonderful city. Not many of the up and coming musicians and artists were spending time in the gym (not saying it wouldn't have been a good idea), and many of them were very, very attractive and had lots of girls crawling all over them. It takes all kinds, is all I'm saying. And please don't get the wrong idea. I am all for exercising. I'm just weary of all this talk about the blonde tan gym girl being the universal ideal, because it is not.
zengirl Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 Not in my heyday. I was in a pretty intense and exciting music scene in a wonderful city. Not many of the up and coming musicians and artists were spending time in the gym (not saying it wouldn't have been a good idea), and many of them were very, very attractive and had lots of girls crawling all over them. It takes all kinds, is all I'm saying. And please don't get the wrong idea. I am all for exercising. I'm just weary of all this talk about the blonde tan gym girl being the universal ideal, because it is not. Yes, I do not think it is even today. But MMV.
mesmerized Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 Not in my heyday. I was in a pretty intense and exciting music scene in a wonderful city. Not many of the up and coming musicians and artists were spending time in the gym (not saying it wouldn't have been a good idea), and many of them were very, very attractive and had lots of girls crawling all over them. It takes all kinds, is all I'm saying. And please don't get the wrong idea. I am all for exercising. I'm just weary of all this talk about the blonde tan gym girl being the universal ideal, because it is not. Meh, I don't find most of the artists attractive, they're too skinny for my taste. Some women like them due to status.
Leigh 87 Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 Well I'm active, and I'm still fat according to your specifications. I also go in the sun, turn bright red, and then fade back to pale. If I do spray tan, I look orange. Is orange better than pale in your opinion? The fact is, some people are never gonna have "killer" bodies no matter what they do. Also I thought you were unemployed and lived in your parents' apartment? But you're also a personal trainer? Color me confused. omg.. u say " unemployed, living in my parents apartment" like it is because I AM A LOSER . uh, I AHD ANOREXIA and a DRUG PROBELM. u B*TCH. I went back to school got high distinctions, and turned my life around, so dont U DARE make out like I am some DROP KICK. And - I was discribing physical attributes, that guys find attractive. Having a healthy glow ( not tan necessarily, just not being ghost white), is one of them. Also - a " killer" body, to a lot of men, simply means "FIT". It does not mean a certain size. You can be a larger build, and be active every day and fit. Your right - some people are not as conventionally attractive. I was jusrt POINTING OUT, that being : skinny", is only one, OF MANY physical attributes, that men go for, and consider" hot". So, the OP has little hope in being skinny, as a means to be attractive, when: her personality and how she makes him feel, and her facial features and other forms of attractivness, will NOT change, no matter HOW thin she gets.
Leigh 87 Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 Leigh, I am not arguing; that's attractive, but there are also guys who like women that sit and write poetry all day and spend their evenings listening to obscure folk rock bands in tiny night clubs, and who have the complexion of a vampire. Or women who have soft and squishy looking voluptuous bodies like Marilyn Monroe who wear glam makeup and wouldn't be caught dead running or in a gym. LOTS of guys. If you aren't a blond, tan, "skinny" gym girl type, please don't feel obliged to try to be that. Personally, I'd never, though I certainly appreciate the beauty of women who do look like that. Look the way you look and feel your best. And do it in good health. Not EVERYBODY needs to buy into the image of "perfection" that is being spoon fed to us all the time. I agree 100%. The way I discribed it is just a GENERAL picture - of course, tanned, skinny, fit, aint everything. However, being at least active and fit are important, unconsciously... u want a fertile and healthy mate I would think? Although, being big and curvy and unfit could constitute that perhaps? You know - even those goth types, or the poets sitting in Cafes... I would like to think that walking around a bit, and not sitting ALL DAY, driving to and FROm the Cafe, that is just around the corner.. cmon! A major turn off, in my oppinion ( to be THAT unhealthy...) But YES - I was generally speaking, for what is popular where I live, here in Aus. A healthy glow, fit, active, likes to enjoy out door activities, etc.
Leigh 87 Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 BMI doesn't matter as much as how a person actually looks. Stop comparing people according to their BMI! I just meant to make the point, that the OP is a BMI that many women would kill to be. If BMI 22 looks large on her, it is actually good news; she has a SMALL build, if a BMI 22 looks large on her.. meaning, she could be BMI 19, and still be :" healthy" for her body type. Where as, I already look slim at BMI 21, so BMI 20 is the lowest I can get. The OP sounds " petite" meaning a lowish BMI looks curvy on her.. she has small bones and is short. MANY men LOVE that look.
Leigh 87 Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 V - I AM a personal trainer. UNfrotunately, due to illness, I was too ill to work. Now that I am well enough, I am about to start again. Thanks for condescending me, and making me feel like I am a hopeless loser, who has not enough prospects in life so as to have to live in my parents flat. YOur a B*TCH. that is why no guys prob like u. Quality guys, prefer kind hearted, warm people, who do not judge people based on their life circumstances.....
mesmerized Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 V - I AM a personal trainer. UNfrotunately, due to illness, I was too ill to work. Now that I am well enough, I am about to start again. Thanks for condescending me, and making me feel like I am a hopeless loser, who has not enough prospects in life so as to have to live in my parents flat. YOur a B*TCH. that is why no guys prob like u. Quality guys, prefer kind hearted, warm people, who do not judge people based on their life circumstances..... Woah! easy girl ! I don't think anybody thinks you are a loser but apparently you're pretty insecure if you let a simple statement affects you this much.
Leigh 87 Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 Nah, I just really dislike people who talk down to people, just because they live at home in their 20's. I do not judge people, unless they seam to be genuinely nasty people. Than I just deam them nasty, and don't bother with them. People who talk down to people living at home with their parents, are snobs, and mean people DO get to me. ( unless the person IS a loser and has no ambition or hopes)
verhrzn Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 V - I AM a personal trainer. UNfrotunately, due to illness, I was too ill to work. Now that I am well enough, I am about to start again. Thanks for condescending me, and making me feel like I am a hopeless loser, who has not enough prospects in life so as to have to live in my parents flat. YOur a B*TCH. that is why no guys prob like u. Quality guys, prefer kind hearted, warm people, who do not judge people based on their life circumstances..... *Rolls eyes* My God, and they call me a drama queen. I insinuated no such thing. YOU did. I was simply asking a clarifying question, because in some other thread YOU specifically said you were spending your unemployment money on such and such a thing, and you lived in your parents' apartment while they were traveling, etc. So I was confused when you also said you were a personal trainer. And you said that you couldn't go back to school, though you never said why, so I thought maybe I was remembering a different poster, or you had SINCE gone to school for health studies, etc. You are the one making yourself feel like hopeless loser. How exactly should I have expressed the fact of "I remember you saying you were unemployed and living with your parents" in a way that DIDN'T rankle your insecurities? Do men also enjoy people who go around taking the slightest offense and shouting that other people are a b*tch because they repeated a fact YOU YOURSELF said? Is that what is considered kind-hearted around your part of the world?
Mme. Chaucer Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 Off topic: V, I find it ironic that you have an entire thread devoted to how you are "bullied."
verhrzn Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 Off topic: V, I find it ironic that you have an entire thread devoted to how you are "bullied." I suppose being called a b*tch and awful person several times for repeating something the poster said about herself, doesn't count as bullying?
Leigh 87 Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 I apologise. I thought u were implying that I was somehow, uneducated, a dropkick, a loser, for living at home. Yes I live at home, although my parents are overseas. That is correct. I take back what I said, providing you were not trying to be nasty about the fact I am living at home.
Leigh 87 Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 The OP'S boyfriend may or not not, also react badly, to how she goes about talking with him, about her insecurities. Guys hate this type of drama, due to misunderstandings. The latest postings have brought a new poeve of advice I want to give to the op, to light: To make it seam like the OP IS NOT making drama out of NOTHING, she could say something like: " I would like to feel better about my body. In the meanwhile, I get the impression that u are more attracted to very thin girls. If this is the case, I would like to think that u could fall for me, fully even if I DO NOT have the body type u most like" The OP needs to comunicate her feelingsm without attacking her boyfriend. If he is a decent and mature guy, he would respond with: " yes, I do find a thinner bodfy type more attractive, but your the one I think is great, your the one I want, and I do not feel bad about mising out on my " prefered" body type, because I am so happy to have you" Or, another reason her body type coulsd bother him, is if he simply is not that into her; he likes her, but us not head over heals ENOUGH, to overlook the fact she is not his ideal body type. trust me. IF a guy really is crazy about being with u, he will not care if your not the body type he prefers. ON the other hand, if he is a JERK, he will say something alone the lines of: " I do think the sinny body type is more attractive, and I do feel a tiny bit bad, but what guy doesn't want the most attractive chick" ....if he feels the least bit bad, he is wastinfg her time. There are plenty of men, who prefer the skinny body type, who do not let their physical preference BOTHER them, if their g/f turns out to be a normal weight fro their height/not skinny. Better still - find a guy who does not desire skinny chicks.
Leigh 87 Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 And verhrzn The main point I have been trying to tell u, is that: your NOT so ugly, that you are TOO off putting to attract ANY men. It is something about you that puts them off, your not too ugly for men. Very few people are truly too ugly for ANY man to be attracted to them. I mentioned I had been one of the minority of people who was once too ugfly to attract men, due to my deformed teeth, which I had an operation and bracces for.... I have also been average, and above average. Average is enough to get a decent guy to love u; not enough for suoper hot guys to notice you, unless they are your good friend first. Now, I get noticed easily and have way mroe options. It is nice, but being average is enough to get a guy to adore you. You think NO guys can ever be attracted to you, which is false. You are nto HIDIOUS. Your prob cute./just not a hottie.
Els Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 (edited) You're on the wrong thread. But please don't go there and bash that girl. She is on serious medications for a serious condition that mess with a person's metabolism very badly. It will take time and a lot of determination to figure out how to lose and maintain a healthy weight while taking those drugs. I don't think the poster you quoted cares about that. Frankly, I'm glad neither of the OPs has returned, because it will be saddening for a 110 lbs 5'1" girl to come back to find herself labelled 'very fat', and equally saddening for a 150 lbs girl who can't lose weight because of epileptic medications to come back to find herself labelled 'lazy and unmotivated'. Some people are clearly living in fantasyland, and to them nothing else matters for a woman except fitting into that fantasy ideal of theirs. Fortunately, not all men are like that. Edited March 9, 2012 by Elswyth 2
Leigh 87 Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 *sigh* it is a very difficult thing for a lof of women to deal with. NO one is better than anyone else. Some guys judge, and only go for a certain type... and a lot of people are just overlooked simply because of their bodies. It is hard enough as it IS, to be a women, and IGNORE the hype. EVEN MORE SO, when there are total JERKS, who are VERY ignorant on the matter of weight loss. SOME people have to work EXTRA hard JUST to NOT be overweight... I count my lucky stars I am not one of them. Yet. I could be, at any time, if I fell ill and need medications that make me gain... I am just f*cking greatful for what I have, that I CAN be slim when I work out and make an effort. Better still - women are becoming LESS GREATFUL, for the fact they can WALK and have two healthy LEGS. No, they do not remember this daily, because they are too bitter that they are not :" thin". Very sad.
garycoleman Posted March 9, 2012 Posted March 9, 2012 I like thick girls as long as they don't have fat spilling over
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