Should I propose to gf despite her past

[Got it]

The issue is:

 

1. A person with an extremely high number may see sex as no big deal. If they see sex as no big deal; could they be more prone to cheat when the relationship hits a low?

 

Or a person with a low number will always think the grass looks greener and more prone to cheating.

 

These are ALL SPECULATIONS and no basis on any real concrete facts.

 

Cheating comes down to the individuals involved, sweeping generalizations aren't going to help.

 

And for the record, I married my high school sweetheart and we were onlies. I cheated. I should have sex (and relationships) with others as that would have really brought to light the issues that we and I had.

 

So from my personal experience, I would worry more about a person with a very low number than a high one. But either way I would want to get into the nitty gritty details on the whys, what makes them tick, what they learned, what they liked, what they didn't like, etc. to get a better foundation in which to make a decision.

[Pierre]

Or a person with a low number will always think the grass looks greener and more prone to cheating.

 

These are ALL SPECULATIONS and no basis on any real concrete facts.

 

Cheating comes down to the individuals involved, sweeping generalizations aren't going to help.

 

And for the record, I married my high school sweetheart and we were onlies. I cheated. I should have sex (and relationships) with others as that would have really brought to light the issues that we and I had.

 

So from my personal experience, I would worry more about a person with a very low number than a high one. But either way I would want to get into the nitty gritty details on the whys, what makes them tick, what they learned, what they liked, what they didn't like, etc. to get a better foundation in which to make a decision.

 

OK, so it comes down to honesty. Not necessarily a number.

 

However, intuition says that promiscuous people may cheat more than none promiscuous.

[Got it]

OK, so it comes down to honesty. Not necessarily a number.

 

However, intuition says that promiscuous people may cheat more than none promiscuous.

 

Who's intuition? Yours? And that means what?

[Pierre]

Who's intuition? Yours? And that means what?

 

Associations between Dopamine D4 Receptor Gene Variation with Both Infidelity and Sexual Promiscuity

 

Abstract

 

Background

 

Human sexual behavior is highly variable both within and between populations. While sex-related characteristics and sexual behavior are central to evolutionary theory (sexual selection), little is known about the genetic bases of individual variation in sexual behavior. The variable number tandem repeats (VNTR) polymorphism in exon III of the human dopamine D4 receptor gene (DRD4) has been correlated with an array of behavioral phenotypes and may be predicatively responsible for variation in motivating some sexual behaviors, particularly promiscuity and infidelity.

 

PLOS ONE: Associations between Dopamine D4 Receptor Gene Variation with Both Infidelity and Sexual Promiscuity

 

:cool:

[Pierre]

Are Sexual Promiscuity and Relationship Infidelity Linked to Different Personality Traits Across Cultures? Findings from the International Sexuality Description Project

 

Over 17,000 participants responded to self-report measures of sexuality and personality as part of the International Sexuality Description Project. It was expected that romantic relationship infidelity would be associated with the personality traits of disagreeableness and a lack of conscientiousness across most cultures. Sexual promiscuity, on the other hand, was expected to relate to extraversion across most cultures. Analyses across 58 cultures from 52 nations revealed that romantic relationship infidelity was significantly associated with disagreeableness and low levels of conscientiousness across most cultures. Sexual promiscuity was related to extraversion across many, but not most, cultural regions. The expected pattern of findings was most strongly evident in South America, Western Europe, Eastern Europe, the Middle East, and Oceania. In some world regions, such as Africa and East Asia, sexual promiscuity was completely unrelated to extraversion levels. Discussion questions focus on why regional differences in sexuality-personality linkages seem to exist.

 

"Sexual Promiscuity, Infidelity and Personality Across Cultures" by David P. Schmitt

[Pierre]

OP, I would not touch your fiance with a ten foot pole.

 

She has waved the red flags in front of you.

 

It is up to you to see the flags.

[Got it]

Holy hell you can actually cite things! Will wonders ever cease!?! :eek:

 

Still doesn't fully support your opinion. But gold star for trying.

[Nyla]

My story: I'm in a 4 year-old relationship and I really love her, want to spend my life with her and settle down. I feel ready by now.

 

The only problem is she told me about her past (unfortunately her number is 32 which is pretty high for a 25 year-old) when we were already in out 2nd into the relationship. This sucks because by then I already fell in love. But she did seem guilty hiding this from me, she sounded like she was on the verge of crying when revealing me all that. Honestly, I would have dump her if I had known about this in the very beginning.

 

She's perfect in every way except that number. I trust her but I just wanna get past this (thing is I'm the same age but only had 6 past gfs, never had ONS nor hook-ups).

 

I guess this is what happens when you asked too much. You get it in the end but with flaws.

 

This is why women should NEVER share the amount of partners they have had. Men always want to brand women with scarlet letters for being promiscuous, even if they have also done the same thing.

 

I remember when I was 23 and had 12 partners. I made the mistake of being honest about that with one man and he wouldn't stop harping on it. He kept saying that my number was "extremely high". This man had two failed marriages and three children by more than one woman, yet he thought he could judge me. I stopped seeing him and vowed never to share my number with any man again.

 

I'm glad you were able to get past this and propose. I hope that you don't hold your fiancée's number against her forever.

[Pierre]

Holy hell you can actually cite things! Will wonders ever cease!?! :eek:

 

Still doesn't fully support your opinion. But gold star for trying.

 

:cool:

 

If you cannot read the abstract, just read the title of the articles.:laugh: