rd1978 Posted June 8, 2004 Posted June 8, 2004 ok here it goes,, 5 years togethor been thru alot,, wants a supper lovey dovey relationship,, lets say i dint always put forth the feelings and time it deserved,, work stress etc.. etc.. being my first serious relationship..... i do really love her though,, and i wish she wasnt so insecure it just drives me nuts.... well anyway she says one day that she doesnt want anyone to worry about,, didnt want any stress,, etc ,,etc,, wanted to be able to go out on dates if she was asked,, wanted to hang out with her friends,, so i told her what i would like to do to fix the relationship,, and if we bolth changed a few things it would have worked i know it ,,, she was so proud of hrself for walking away she knew she couldnt come right back,,,, i toldher i wanted a future and not a kid relationship like we had,, but she had a hard time believing,,, she told me i dont know in 2 weeks i might want you back 2 months 6 months never i dont know,,, but here's the catch when we were having problems there was another kid involved that she talked to ont he computer and phone and became friendly with him.... { he's not good looking and seems like a punk and he's really skinny,, but im sure he's giving her all the feelings and emotions i didnt but wished i did,,, so they have been hangoing out once in a while we have been broken up for 6 weeks,, 1 time i ddi see them out holding hands and she rubbed it right in my face acting like an a**h***,, she was also drunk running around with her new prize although she def. downgraded BUT HERE IS WHAT I DONT UNDERSTAND...... i asked her not to call me if she did not want to work things out... she told me she misses me if we dont talk for a couple of days,, then she says i dont know what i wouold do without you in my life,,,but she kept calling and i refused to awnser ,,then after a week the calling stopped,, and i had her blocked on im,,, so 2 weeks later i unblocked her and she started to write me,,, ok i didnt respond,, then finally i did after she put up an away message and i knew she wasnt home ,, so she called me that night i didnt awnser then she called me the next day and i awnsered and acted like i didnt see who it was before i awnsered and we talked for like 5 minutes and i toldher i had to go we were bolth happy on the phone and she was reall really happy i wansered and wanted to know why???? she also wanted to know why i wrote her back on the comp... so i kinda just said why not, and told her i had to go ,,and i guess i would talk to her sometime maybe... keep in mind she has no clue what ive been doing if im seeing anyone.....i havent been going out to the same places that i know she will be at,,,,, so after that 3 days later she im's me again and says hello,, then i have a question for you,, but i ddint respond again ,,, SO WHY IS SHE CONTACTING ME i told her to do everything not to,,, i dont want to push her away but i dont want to make her comfortable so she thinks im waiting or something....it seems like she runs to this kid when i refused to talk to her ,, i guess i could talk to her and try to make her feel comfortable again? or just let her be and see if she comes back,, she is very insecure even if she wanted to workt hings out,, i dont know if she would try because she doesnt know if i have found someone else..... AND THE THING IS the 1 time i did call back in the begining she was like why are you calling me... and i said i cant talk to you and she was like all bitch well if you really want to ,,, but this is after her calling me like 5 times that weeks and me calling her none,, { i almost just want to let her be and see what happens ,, i know she misses me and i know if we did work it out this time was def needed ... any help would be usefull sorry so long,, maybe she might miss me but im being standoffish ?????
sally1530 Posted June 11, 2004 Posted June 11, 2004 My ex fiance of 6 weeks now has said hes moving on and no longer seeks or wants a relationship with me. Its like we cant even be friends or even check to see how each other is doing, it really hurts that he hates me that much and wants to move on so quickly. I found out he a profile and ad up seeking sex with women a month before the wedding. I found out he was wanting naked pictures of them and was looking on live porn. He said he was having doubts about us... well I found out he was on this site paying for it for our entire 14 month relationship. Why would he propose after 10 months and then have doubts? Commitment Phobia/ Sexual addiction? Not sure. But the fact that he hates me for this... I dont understand, maybe its because I made him pay $15,000 for the wedding? He said when he cancelled the wedding that he would pay for the costs. I gave him back his $3000.00 ring... I guess that wasnt enough... Anyway, do you think he will try and contact me in the future? or is this really the end of us talking ? He said he has nothing to talk to me about.... well I just wonder how you can almost walk down the isle with someone and then one month later hate them and never want to see or speak to them again? I didnt cheat, he was the one doing the wrong not me, hes just made I found out and that I didnt see him as the prince charming I thought he was..... Any advice? Do you think he will regret what hes done? Does he hate me? Will he ever get in contact with me again? I miss talking with him , but I know we are both hurting right now and probably this is a good thing not talking and seeing each other so we can both move on. I just hope someday we can be at a " not hate each other " stage.
faux Posted June 11, 2004 Posted June 11, 2004 Block her emails and IMs, and screen your phone calls. It shouldn't matter that this girl is being odd and keeps calling you. If you don't want her to call you then you don't have to accept her phone calls. From all of your other posts however, I'm getting the impression that you like it when she bothers you. If you don't want her to talk to you, however, just don't talk to her. It's as easy as that. You are in control of who can talk to you and who cannot. If you end up picking up the phone and it is her just hang up, and be sure to screen your calls.
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