Sugarkane Posted March 6, 2012 Posted March 6, 2012 Seems common on here. Seemingly no problems before they've been proposed to, but then they run when it happens.
Philosoraptor Posted March 6, 2012 Posted March 6, 2012 Seems common on here. Seemingly no problems before they've been proposed to, but then they run when it happens. At that point things get too "real" and they really have to bring to light any issues that were brushed over as they are making a life changing decision. It sometimes comes as a rush and panic, which can cause a quick decision. It also may just be the motivation they need to say "I'm not happy here and I will not spend the rest of my life in this". In many cases this is the result of poor communication.
PegNosePete Posted March 6, 2012 Posted March 6, 2012 Proposing is rather like an ultimatum. If things have been all light and happy up to that point, then suddenly the proposer is saying, "right time for a final answer, stay with me forever?". If the answer is not a resounding "yes" then it's hard to go back to how it was before. The proposer may (justifiably) feel, "if you're not prepared to commit to me now, where is this relationship going? Am I wasting my time here, on someone who is not as committed as I am? Why do you not want to marry me, is there someone else, do you want to play the field a bit more, are you hanging on for a better offer?". Proposing marriage changes the dynamic in a relationship so much that it can have drastic effects.
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