Numb79 Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 I just remembered that I have an old phone with pictures of me and the Ex on it. I am hesitant to throw it away because that is actually the last thing I have that signifies that it was real. I know I must do it.... in order for myself to heal. I have already discarded all other momentos of the relationship and this would be the last of it. For some reason.... its as if when I do this, then it would be denying that "WE" ever existed. I know that it would be unhealthy to keep such things. What are everyones thoughts on this matter? I have literally tossed everything else out.... why am I struggling with this last piece? Could it be that in my mind I know that once I do this... it is really OVER? Is this my sub conscious trying to hold onto what was once comfortable? I don't know..... any thoughts would be greatly appreciated
Cmac Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 You don't need pictures to prove something was real. Your memories do that for you. 2
Philosoraptor Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 I agree memories are enough. I also don't delete pictures as these are my memories and I like to take my camera everywhere. Save them somewhere else to be found after you have healed if you don't want to delete them. But don't let it bother you now.
BewitchedandBothered Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 Hi, Numb. It depends on you. My ex turned out to be a phony and very abusive, so therefore I feel what we had didn't exist; there was no love, so why on earth would I want a picture of the cad that hurt me in terrible ways. I threw things away in steps. First, I had a memory box of things from our time together. Knowing it was there was haunting me. These tangible things only reminded me of his abuse, so I threw it all away. Then came the pictures. I was angry enough at him to delete them and the videos he sent me of us. He took little video clips of us on the beach--that was maybe the only sweetest memory I had of him...but since it was all an act, that all had to go. Knowing him, he saved it all. He had a trunk full of old pics of his ex wife that he was still mooning over while with me and had the nerve to invite me to see them. I felt victorious, very strong when I got rid of everything, including pics he took of me. He took the pic-makes me sad to think about. What is the point of keeping pics of your ex anyway? But...that's just me. You do what you need to in your own timeline and follow your heart.
volkl1996 Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 Toss it now..I went thru this this summer when I moved back into our shared house. It took me a while, but I started tossing anything that reminded me of her and eventually replacing it with my stuff or new stuff. Great healing exercise. 1
Pat99 Posted March 6, 2012 Posted March 6, 2012 Get rid of it all. The less reminders you have of someone the faster you will recover. 1
agrj26 Posted March 6, 2012 Posted March 6, 2012 Toss It bro...The pain of seeing it again just aint worth it.Its just a picture anyway.. 1
sweetheart5381 Posted March 6, 2012 Posted March 6, 2012 Yes, I have to admit, I kept a pic of my ex and I together. I deleted everything else in the first few days of the b/u, but didnt have the heart to erase him completely. I still don't. Maybe someday I will erase the pics, but not today. One day at a time, one foot in front of the other.
jus d'orange Posted March 6, 2012 Posted March 6, 2012 I found that simply putting all of the pictures out of easy reach was enough. They're either in my closet or hidden away on the hard drive. I suppose there are still old Facebook pictures of us together; I could remove them easily enough, but their existence doesn't bother me. If, someday, she asked me to remove them, I would. Likewise, if a new girl in my life said she wanted my Facebook to be clear of pictures of me and her together, I would likewise comply agreeably. As long as I have no forced reminders, I feel like I'll be okay. If you don't want to have the pictures for later in life to look back on, and you think you'll find throwing everything out, I see no reason why you should keep it. It's worthless to you and may only cause further pain.
g450 Posted March 7, 2012 Posted March 7, 2012 Well I am the exact opposit of everyone else here. I was married for over twenty years so I kept all my pictures. They will go to my Son when I die. I simply do not look at them. But I do keep them because they are my history. I simply view them as a window into my past and nothing more. The healthy thing to do is to not look at them and that is exactly what I did. My fiancee is doing the same wither her photos. So I have no problem with that. Sometimes a reminder is good even if it's painful because it reminds you of what went wrong and allows you to learn from your past. In a short term thing I would probably be like everybody else and say trash the phone. In the end it's really up to you and how you fell about it.
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