Jemma32 Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 Hi all, I am in a very happy and loving relationship and have been with my partner for 12 years, we have a 6 year old daughter who we both dote on. Our daughter goes to dance classes 3 times a week and I've been finding myself feeling very awkward. One of the other little girls gets taken very often by her dad, I have never had a proper conversation with him, I do say hello out of politeness and thats about it.. The problem is that I keep finding him starring at me, or constantly glancing at me. One of the other parents has noticed it too and mentioned it to me a few weeks back. He has a wife/partner too and I have spoken to her quite a few times and she is lovely. She really deserves better than this sleasy man. I saw her whilst out shopping at the weekend and she said that she no longer takes their daughter to dancing as her dad likes to take her... It's making me so awkward that if my daughter didn't love her dance class so much I would take her out. Not sure how I can stop him behaving like this? I'm really not comfortable with the constant glancing and starring... Any suggestions?
TigerCub Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 He's trying to see if you're interested. Just ignore and read a book, make a phone call, etc. Better yet, get your partner to take her every now and then. Those are good suggestions, also, you could always just say to him "your constant staring at me makes me uncomfortable, please stop"
standtall Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 Has he ever said anything to you? If not, then get over it and MYOB. Who knows what a person is looking at...maybe he is staring off into space and looking through you. 3
zengirl Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 I don't consider "staring" to really be that sleazy. Socially awkward, maybe, but it's not as though he's actually trying to pick you up.
The Blue Knight Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 I don't consider "staring" to really be that sleazy. Socially awkward, maybe, but it's not as though he's actually trying to pick you up. I'd agree with zengirl. It's not sleazy. Perhaps it's uncomfortable. For some, it may even be flattering. The two likely reasons he's looking your way are: 1. He's interested and trying to get a feel for where you're at. 2. You look like someone he knows and he's trying to figure out if you're that person. (This has actually happened to me where I'm the one looking so I know it's a possibility). I'd either just chalk it up as you're a good looking gal and be flattered by it, or if it really bothers you, approach him and tell him politely that it makes you a bit uncomfortable when he's starring at you.
KathyM Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 He's obviously interested, and you need to put an end to that, for his daughter's sake. I'm sure she would be uncomfortable if she realized her dad had a thing for some other woman in the class, and it's just a matter of time before she realizes it, if she hasn't already, if he's staring that much. I would suggest you have your partner take your daughter to class some of the time, ignore his glances, and even go with your partner to class some of the time. I'll bet he won't stare when your partner is there, and will probably, hopefully, back off when he realizes your partner is heavily into the picture. He may think there is no other guy in the picture, and that you are fair game. 1
veggirl Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 Well, I disagree with those who say staring is not sleazy. I certainly wouldn't feel comfortable if my man was staring at another woman over and over again. Gross. I wouldn't want to be stared at in that manner, either. I would absolutely NOT acknowledge him in any way, shape or form. I wouldn't look at him. What a creep. 1
DonVee Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 I'd agree with zengirl. It's not sleazy. Perhaps it's uncomfortable. For some, it may even be flattering. The two likely reasons he's looking your way are: 1. He's interested and trying to get a feel for where you're at. 2. You look like someone he knows and he's trying to figure out if you're that person. (This has actually happened to me where I'm the one looking so I know it's a possibility). I'd either just chalk it up as you're a good looking gal and be flattered by it, or if it really bothers you, approach him and tell him politely that it makes you a bit uncomfortable when he's starring at you. I totally agree with this I to have been guilty to reckless starring not because I admire a person but because they look so familiar to me... NOW if he hasn't made any advances towards you consider it innocent however if his gazes make you uncomfortable let him know (in a nice way of course). True story this happened to me 2 months ago: I was picking my son up from daycare and another parent was there picking up their child, as I stood at the front desk singing my son out a man was looking me up and down and blurted out "Damn"... Now me the the out spooken woman that I am quickly snapped back "Please don't do that it's very rude"! and he went on his way and I went mine and now every time I see him he don't even look my way! 2
Author Jemma32 Posted March 5, 2012 Author Posted March 5, 2012 Thanks for all your replies, it's good to have other people's opinions. I know that if my partner was constantly looking at another woman there's no way I'd feel OK with that. We've taken our daughter together many times and it's not made a difference, my partner is generally at work though hence why it's usually me taking her. I will just see if things change... Maybe he'll find something else to stare at soon...
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