singlelife Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 Trying to see what the ladies think. Me and my ex had a bad break up in the past. We talked on the phone and more as friends. Then I went to visit her and she ran and gave me a big hug. Then a huge kiss. So we hung out then she took me to dinner. During beers she kept kissing me. We had a good time talking and hanging out. Then back at her pkace we made out hard!!! Then she stopped and sais she was having all these feelings that she didn't think she would have and if we had sex it would lead to her wanting more and she would be all messed up nd she couldn't just be fwb with anybody. I told her no we're just friends and there would be no furthering into a relationship. So We ended it right there with no hard feelings. My question is, is this legit how women have this happen to them or is it just bs? I'm trying to understand.
ditzchic Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 Is it legit that women have feelings? Yes it is... I have an ex that I hope to never even see again because I'm not sure if I could handle it. So yeah, it's perfectly legit that she can't have sex with you.
Emilia Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 It is legit if you are a normal human being with feelings rather than a robot. Once you really like someone you can't go backwards with your feelings and try to be FWBs, it doesn't work like that. It sounds to me you have never been in love OP
Author singlelife Posted March 5, 2012 Author Posted March 5, 2012 I have been in love and was in love with her at a point in time! But I don't know everything, and that is why I asked the question.
FitChick Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 I don't see the point in having sex with an ex unless one or both people are desperate with no alternatives.
dasein Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 It's BS because of the crass, obvious manipulation. If she has too many feelings to have sex with an ex, she shouldn't be teasing an ex right up to the point of sex. The end. 1
Love2Love11 Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 It is very true that women equate sex w. love and having sex can complicate other feelings. I applaud her for not going all the way, but it is a little weird that you guys got as far as "back to her place." Is it a game?...I think way too many people play games nowadays...what the hell is up with that?
kaylan Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 Sorry OP, but you asked a supremely silly question with an obvious answer. Its hard for a lot of people, man or woman, to have sex with an ex they still have feelings for. Ive done the hooking up thing after breaking up with an ex. Ive also hooked up with girls I really liked but knew things were definitely not going anywhere. Never will I do these things again. It tears you up to know theres no future with someone you care about. So to become intimate with them just conjures up all of those lovey dovey emotions you have for them. It wreaks havoc on your mind and heart when you know the road leads no where. So as a smarter guy who knows better now, why would I put myself in such a situation? Nothing good comes from hooking up with an ex. It just causes pain. Its simple to understand. 1
Million.to.1 Posted March 5, 2012 Posted March 5, 2012 it is obvious to me that she was testing the waters to see if you guys could work things out. You were reciprocating her being physical with you, which was her tool to reel you back in perhaps, and then before things got too far she laid her cards on the table which may of led you to say, yes, lets work it out, or try again or whatever. But you didn't. You did the right thing by being honest and so did she. Seems like an immature way to approach things from her end, yes but i gather you guys are young, so it's understandable. just be thankful things didn't go any further as it would have been wwwwaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyy more complicated now if it had. If you care about her, don't sleep with her if you don't want a relationship. She obviously isn't over you and it would be best to maybe let the "friendship" take a back seat for the meantime too. Give her some space to move on with her life.
Author singlelife Posted March 6, 2012 Author Posted March 6, 2012 Sorry OP, but you asked a supremely silly question with an obvious answer. Its hard for a lot of people, man or woman, to have sex with an ex they still have feelings for. Ive done the hooking up thing after breaking up with an ex. Ive also hooked up with girls I really liked but knew things were definitely not going anywhere. Never will I do these things again. It tears you up to know theres no future with someone you care about. So to become intimate with them just conjures up all of those lovey dovey emotions you have for them. It wreaks havoc on your mind and heart when you know the road leads no where. So as a smarter guy who knows better now, why would I put myself in such a situation? Nothing good comes from hooking up with an ex. It just causes pain. Its simple to understand. makes sense.
Author singlelife Posted March 6, 2012 Author Posted March 6, 2012 it is obvious to me that she was testing the waters to see if you guys could work things out. You were reciprocating her being physical with you, which was her tool to reel you back in perhaps, and then before things got too far she laid her cards on the table which may of led you to say, yes, lets work it out, or try again or whatever. But you didn't. You did the right thing by being honest and so did she. Seems like an immature way to approach things from her end, yes but i gather you guys are young, so it's understandable. just be thankful things didn't go any further as it would have been wwwwaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyy more complicated now if it had. If you care about her, don't sleep with her if you don't want a relationship. She obviously isn't over you and it would be best to maybe let the "friendship" take a back seat for the meantime too. Give her some space to move on with her life. interesting.
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