Brokenheart2008 Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 Hey guys, new here. I'm 22 years old and my girlfriend is 20 and her boss is 25 or 24... Anyways heres my story. I was in LOVE LOVE LOVE with this girl since I was 16.. we grew up together. We hit a rough patch after our 4 years anniversery. She developed feelings for my best friend. Now I forgave her because I was going through some problems and neglected her.. we got back together afterwards and we became stronger, (at least I thought). We hung out EVERYDAY. She became so close to my family again. Then she got a new job. And back in Septemeber i noticed she was texting her boss alot.. We got in fights because of this. Well after New years I got that gut feeling that something wasn't right. She at this time was EXTERMELY LOVEY TO ME Always asking for kisses, holding my hand. Telling me how we are so much stronger and nothing will break us. Well to spice things up I decided every friday to have a date night. We would go out to dinner and movie or whatever. She absoultely loved this. Well on our 4th date night me and her were having a blast. We went back to my house to cuddle. She feel asleep. Something told me to go through her phone, and what I saw was absoultely digusting. She was having an affair with her boss. They were sexting back and forth. I confronted her immediatly and she admitted it. She cried and cried and cried. Saying she regrets it blah blah blah.. Well the next 2 weeks we saw each other a couple times, had sex, I asked her i'd be willing to work through this but she says "she needs space to understand why she did it in the first place". We talked a couple more times, but I eventually told her I can't talk to her anymore, and I hope she realizes that she truly loves me and wants to be with me. I preceded to implement NC, I broke it twice already after 3 days. But know its been 2 weeks of NC I am pretty sure she is seeing this guy now, cause I sometimes check her phone records and they blow each other up, although her facebook still says shes single. I stopped doing that and I am trying my hardest to move on but I want her so bad! Its been over a month since we broke up. When I would break NC I would tell her how much I loved her and the last thing she said to me was "I still cry at night and I love you to death". then she never texted back when I asked her if I'll ever see her again. How is it so easy for her to just get up and not talk to me after talking to me every single day for 6 years. Will she ever contact me again? In the meantime I'm getting in the best shape of my life, hanging out with my old friends, but a huge hole is missing. I want her back. So BAD.
Chi townD Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 Don't you love it when they say that they need space to figure things out and the first thing they do is going running to the other guy? Dude, I know you love her. But, here's the rub. She doesn't love you as much as you love her. She's being and immature and selfish. Dude, you need to go NC and start to heal from this relationship. DO NOT BE HER DOORMAT!!!
Author Brokenheart2008 Posted March 2, 2012 Author Posted March 2, 2012 I know man. I just don't get it. I want her back so bad. I don't know what I did wrong for her to fall out of love with me.
goohoo Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 I'm sure you did nothing wrong. Sometimes you can do everything in your power to make things right and if the other party just doesn't want it, it's not going to happen. Cold hard fact my friend. It takes two for it to work.
Author Brokenheart2008 Posted March 2, 2012 Author Posted March 2, 2012 I know, but what I don't get is how she like lied to my face and my family's face day in and day out. Like I had no idea, she was so lovey to me. Always telling me we are gonna get married. How nothing can destroy us and BOOM its over.
rickys Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 Hey...it seems that she doesn't need you and was using you. It will be better for you of you will accept it now otherwise it can create troubles in your life..
smoothcriminal Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 first off, me and you, we still young man. we got A LOT of time ahead of us to meet new girls and experience new love. both parties ( you and her) need time to grow as individuals in order fully realize what it means to be fully committed to one another. at our young age, its hard to truly comprehend that without going thru heartbreak at some point. its a learning process and theres nothing wrong with you. NONE of this is your fault. cheating is a choice made by those individuals, regardless of circumstances. maybe things were rough but at the end of the day, the question to be asked before cheating is "do i cheat on him/her OR do i go back to them and work out whats wrong with our relationship?" at this point, its all up to the said person. and like i said dude, we are YOUNG. take this time to grow and improve yourself. expand your culture and experiences so you can find yourself someone who is deserving of your time and affection. and if you feel like its overwhelming, just post and we can tlk.
Falcon25 Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 want to know what you did wrong? Became too available, too lovey, too into her. You bored her. Women want a challenge. Once they know you love them more than they do, they are gone. Next time kid. 1
stimson554 Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 listen and listen good, you dont want to hear this but its the truth, you need to kick her out of your life completely, hard as it may be its nescessary because the only reason shes gonna stay around is to compensate for that guilt she feels for leaving you, nothing else. you need to take time off of dating and become indapendant in yourself that you dont need anyone to make you happy then only then will tyou be ready to jump back into dating. guaranteed if youdo you will be untouchable feelings wise in a bad breakup and if you leave the **** alone do your own thing within a few months she will come crawling back to you saying she made a big mistake, i speak the truth take these words and dwell on them.
nick d Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 I feel your pain man. I am going through a rough break up myself where I love her more than she loves me. And just like others have said, go straight NC. That is where I messed up. I kept talking to her and became her doormat. Now I have pushed her so far away she could care less about me. So just go NC and act like you couldn't be happier (even though your dying on the inside). And this will drive her crazy!
Author Brokenheart2008 Posted March 2, 2012 Author Posted March 2, 2012 Ive been on NC. What I don't understand is I always thought she was soooo happy with me... If I was having a bad day she made sure to cheer me up. I guess I got too needy? But to actually go and cheat on me is so messed up. Like how can someone sit there, tell me they love me soooo much and go do that?!
Exit Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 Try not to blame yourself so much, you're not the one who cheated. Yes there is some merit to the theories of "not being too needy" and "giving a girl a challenge", but regardless, nothing you do gives someone a free pass to cheat on you. Relationships are unique in that it seems to be the one situation in life where you can be treated badly and try to figure out how to blame yourself. If you're walking down the street and someone runs up behind you and stabs you, would we blame ourselves? Were we walking down the wrong sidewalk at the wrong time of day, did we do something to upset this random stranger that made them attack us? No. People are just *******s. Same thing with getting cheated on. Nobody is perfect in a relationship. I'm sure she did things wrong too. Did you take that as an excuse to start flirting with someone else? No. Be mad at her, not yourself.
Author Brokenheart2008 Posted March 2, 2012 Author Posted March 2, 2012 What makes me so mad right now is how she just doesn't give a **** about 6 years. Like cold hearted or what!
Falcon25 Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 TIME means nothing to them. There are women who have been married for a decade with two kids that cheat on their husbands. IT MEANS NOTHING TO THEM.
olivec Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 I know man. I just don't get it. I want her back so bad. I don't know what I did wrong for her to fall out of love with me. I know what your going through man my girl I was with for 5 years cheated on me I was completely ****ed after that for along while. she did the samething the whole crying act bul****. We talked for a few weeks after I moved out but soon afterthat she changed her tune and was less responsive and didn"t hear from her and no more apologies. Took along time to get over the anger and depression that followed. I would stay with no contact man because its only gunna get worse if you still try to stay in her life. Your on the right track with hanging out with your friends and going to the gym helps to get that stress off. Bottomline if you were to take her back whats not to say she would cheat on you again? Do you really want to take that chance again? Shes proven that she cannot be trusted now.
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