mesmerized Posted February 28, 2012 Share Posted February 28, 2012 (edited) What does lack of eye contact on a date mean to you? I usually take it as a sign that he is not interested. But most of the time when it happened to me, the guy actually was interested...they texted or called me after and asked me out again. Does it mean they were nervous on the date if they avoided looking at me? What are the reasons for this in your experience? I personally always look in the eyes of the guy I'm talking to if I'm interested. It makes me uncomfortable when guys do that. Edited February 28, 2012 by mesmerized Link to post Share on other sites
ThaWholigan Posted February 28, 2012 Share Posted February 28, 2012 What does lack of eye contact on a date mean to you? I usually take it as a sign that he is not interested. But most of the time when it happened to me, the guy actually was interested...they texted or called me after and asked me out again. Does it mean they were nervous on the date if they avoided looking at me? What are the reasons for this in your experience? I personally always look in the eyes of the guy I'm talking to if I'm interested. It makes me uncomfortable when guys do that. It always makes girls uncomfortable when guys do that. It usually is a sign of nerves, or generally a lack of confidence or conviction. I used to do it to everyone, I never looked people in the eye. When I was diagnosed, I made a concerted effort to improve this aspect and look people in the eye, as body language was telling them that I was rude, when in fact I just couldn't look people in the eye, it made me uncomfortable to do so. Link to post Share on other sites
Oxy Moronovich Posted February 28, 2012 Share Posted February 28, 2012 When you see a hot chick on the street, you're supposed to look for a few seconds and look away. Many inexperienced guys think they should act this way on dates too. Link to post Share on other sites
SJC2008 Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Women are very intuitive and read body language better than men (google it). When someone fails to maintain eye contact it can be because they are intimidated by the person they're talking to, they could be dishonest and possibly not interested. Usually it's the intimidted one. I have been working hard on my eye contact, not knowing how bad I was and realized it stemmed from my confidence. Improving my eye contact has actually helped my confidence. I'm in customer service so I have the perfect opp to use it. When an attractive woman comes in I try to hold eye contact until she breaks first (no I don't come off as creepy) as practice. Now I must admit some of these attractive woman have steel balls and will stare you down pupil to pupil and I break first lol! When you meet a woman for the first time and break eye contact first it sends her a subconscious signal that you are weak and submit to her, (yes their are exceptions) and if you are interested in her romantically your chances just did a nose dive. He's more than likely initimidated by you and posssibly dishonest. Look for other body language clues like crossed arms etc. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mesmerized Posted February 29, 2012 Author Share Posted February 29, 2012 When you see a hot chick on the street, you're supposed to look for a few seconds and look away. Many inexperienced guys think they should act this way on dates too. This could be the case for my recent date. Maybe he thought this would impress me? I honestly have no clue. Women are very intuitive and read body language better than men (google it). When someone fails to maintain eye contact it can be because they are intimidated by the person they're talking to, they could be dishonest and possibly not interested. Usually it's the intimidted one. I have been working hard on my eye contact, not knowing how bad I was and realized it stemmed from my confidence. Improving my eye contact has actually helped my confidence. I'm in customer service so I have the perfect opp to use it. When an attractive woman comes in I try to hold eye contact until she breaks first (no I don't come off as creepy) as practice. Now I must admit some of these attractive woman have steel balls and will stare you down pupil to pupil and I break first lol! When you meet a woman for the first time and break eye contact first it sends her a subconscious signal that you are weak and submit to her, (yes their are exceptions) and if you are interested in her romantically your chances just did a nose dive. He's more than likely initimidated by you and posssibly dishonest. Look for other body language clues like crossed arms etc. Maybe...but this last guy is a goodlooking guy...I'm sure hes dated goodlooking women. So I'm not sure if he was intimidated by me, but he was a little shy and nervous I think. We met from online dating so when he met me and immediately was lacking eye contact, I assumed he didn't find me attractive. But I know for a fact he did from what we talked about after. It's so confusing. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mesmerized Posted February 29, 2012 Author Share Posted February 29, 2012 Should I ask the guy why he was lacking eye contact or is that weird to ask? Link to post Share on other sites
SJC2008 Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 (edited) I'd stray away from asking him why he doesn't keep eye contact. Does he hold a little and then look away? Or does it seem like he tried to avoid eye contact all together? Were his arms crossed a lot? That's a sign of being closed off/not interested. You say he's good looking so tell us if you are "in his league", and I'm not trying to open a there are no leagues debate I'm just trying to gain insight. What race is he? From what I've read, eye contact is strong in North America and almost insulting in some Asian cultures. Edited February 29, 2012 by SJC2008 punctuation Link to post Share on other sites
Author mesmerized Posted February 29, 2012 Author Share Posted February 29, 2012 I'd stray away from asking him why he doesn't keep eye contact. Does he hold a little and then look away? Or does it seem like he tried to avoid eye contact all together? Were his arms crossed a lot? That's a sign of being closed off/not interested. You say he's good looking so tell us if you are "in his league", and I'm not trying to open a there are no leagues debate I'm just trying to gain insight. What race is he? From what I've read, eye contact is strong in North America and almost insulting in some Asian cultures. Yes, I don't think I'm less than him in the looks department. We hung out for about 4.5 hours and texted about an hour and a half after...so I doubt it was him not being interested. He was the one who texted me half an hour after saying he had fun and didn't want to stop texting. The lack of eye contact only happened at the beginning stage of meeting up, for like the first half an hour. Then he was more normal. Link to post Share on other sites
SJC2008 Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Then I'd say shyness/1st date jitters.If he texted you already he's definately interestes. It's early on so I'd give him the benefit of the doubt for now. Link to post Share on other sites
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