Reconcilition?

[Dive1234]

Sorry about the typo in the title.So, on Saturday I ended my LDR with my boyfriend. We have been friends since 03, but just started dating 6 months ago. Generally, things were great but we had some communication.problems. We are both 30 and were discussing marriage in the next two years. He was looking to transfer to my city.

 

Saturday we were talking about an issue had with one of his posts on social media. I ended the convo with noting that he has an issie admitting when he is wrong or apologizing. I just said in the future just be more direct with me. So he decide to be more direct then about stuff bothering him. He claimed that I left work early to go out with my friends and didnt do that for him. And he said I let work get in the way of how often we talked.

 

One, the stuff about my friends simply is not true. I leave at the same time each Friday for him when he is.in town or for friends and family. Two, I take every chance i get to talk him. Morning, lunch, after work...that is daily. I felt like he didnt appreciate what I do for him. Basically, i told him that i was trying my best but it wasn't enough. So I broke it off because I cant do more. I live states away and work a 12-hour day. I also told him not to come in two weeks to help me with my move.

 

He said ok. I called back and left a message. I need my apt key. He didn't answer or call back. A part of me wants him back because I do love him. Another part is terrified that I won't ever meet his needs because of my job. Should I try reconciling and not?

Edited February 27, 2012 by Dive1234
typo

[Exit]

You can't spread yourself too thin or you will just end up unhappy anyway. If you truly feel you already give him all that you can, then it's not up to you, the ball is in his court to understand the circumstances of the situation. If you really do leave work at the same time regardless of whether it's for him or friends or family, and if you do make an effort to be in touch with him as often as you can, then there's nothing more you can do. Have you told him these explanations? Have you told him he's imagining it when he thinks you make more of an effort to see your friends? If you haven't made that clear to him, then maybe I would communicate that part of it and leave it at that.

 

Long distance relationships are really tough though and they do take extra effort, it is hard to make someone feel secure that the relationship is alright and that nothing fishy is going on when you can hardly see each other. With how busy you are at work, maybe it's best to let it go.

[Dive1234]

I did point those facts out. I said...I left at the same time to see you wheb you were town as I did my friends. It made me upset because he was flat out lying. When he exaggerated the time we spent talking when I had a crazy week at work, I pointed out that I call during lunch, text througout the day, and call when I leave. He works the night shift at his job, so Ithey also calllook in the am sometimes even tho i have to get up an hour or two later. When I said he sounded ungrateful and selfish, as if he didn't appreciate what Io for him, he tried to backtrack by saying he does appreciate what I do but he was just telling me how he feels. That still doesn't fix anything. I him what he said was hurtful, but he just kept saying that's how he feels and he thinks I misunderstood. We both understood that he felt as if I gave more time to friends than him or something.

 

He is the jealous type and based on what he was saying to me, he comes off as a little controlling too nowhere. (He said he views the weekend as HIS time.) I have given him no reason not to trust me, so I don't know why he is like this. He hasn't called mme back and probably wont I am guessing. But I do love him and want to be with him. If distance was the ONLY issue he could've moved and found a job here, but I know he wouldn't have been happy with that. (I say that cause I would've been the breadwinner regardless.)