lifeasiknowit Posted February 27, 2012 Posted February 27, 2012 I met a guy on POF, and although we have only been on a few dates, we have really connected. When I looked on his profile a couple of times (in my sent messages), I saw each time he hasn't been on for at least 24 hours. I know this because if a user has not logged on for 24 hours or more, the last login time shows blank. From this, it seems to me he isn't looking around either. I have no interest in dating other guys. Not just because I am really into this one, but I find it really difficult to juggle/multi-date. I want to get to know him more and see where this goes, and I feel I can only do that by just focusing on him. Even though, it's early, I want to take it seriously. If it doesn't work out, I can always make another account. He's even mentioned in passing about me meeting members of his family, doing more activities together, and has bought me gifts. I think there's no harm in me deleting my account, because I see it as me being honest about where I stand. He also doesn't believe in playing games, since we have made it apparent to each other that we like each other, and have already spent lots of time together in a short period. Thoughts?
USMCHokie Posted February 27, 2012 Posted February 27, 2012 I have no interest in dating other guys. It's not that hard. Disable the account.
Author lifeasiknowit Posted February 27, 2012 Author Posted February 27, 2012 It's not that hard. Disable the account. By disable, do you mean keep the profile but have it inactive/hidden, or a complete delete? I think to make it clear, I should just delete it. If the relationship doesn't work out, it would take me no more than 15-30 mins to create the profile again.
Author lifeasiknowit Posted February 27, 2012 Author Posted February 27, 2012 I guess, the reason why I'm apprehensive about deleting my account is I'm worried about his reaction. I'm somewhat sure he would be relieved about it, but a tiny part of me thinks he might freak out. I mean, he hasn't deleted his account yet, although it looks like he hasn't logged on for a long time.
USMCHokie Posted February 27, 2012 Posted February 27, 2012 By disable, do you mean keep the profile but have it inactive/hidden, or a complete delete? I think to make it clear, I should just delete it. If the relationship doesn't work out, it would take me no more than 15-30 mins to create the profile again. I mean to keep it inactive/hidden. If it only takes you 15-30 minutes to recreate the profile (assuming you haven't copied and saved the profile content), then I would venture to say that your profile probably leaves a bit to be desired...but if it works for you, then by all means have at it...pictures are really all a girl needs, right...?
Author lifeasiknowit Posted February 27, 2012 Author Posted February 27, 2012 (edited) Oh, I have my profile info saved in my email as well as photos saved on my computer. I also like to write, so I find it easy to write about myself. Wouldn't it be a cop out to just hide my profile? If I know I don't want to read messages from other men or look at other men, I would rather just go ahead and delete it. The only thing that's stopping me is how he would react. Either he will see I deleted my account and do the same, or he will keep his profile up, and I'll know where we stand 100%. Edited February 27, 2012 by lifeasiknowit
daphne Posted February 27, 2012 Posted February 27, 2012 The only thing that's stopping me is how he would react. Either he will see I deleted my account and do the same, or he will keep his profile up, and I'll know where we stand 100%. I don't know how long you've dated, but you really might want him to take the lead on this. I've been in this situation before, and I think it can freak the guy out. Wait til he brings it up.
Author lifeasiknowit Posted February 27, 2012 Author Posted February 27, 2012 I don't know how long you've dated, but you really might want him to take the lead on this. I've been in this situation before, and I think it can freak the guy out. Wait til he brings it up. I see what you mean. However, I don't plan on asking him to delete his profile until he brings it up on his own. I just want to delete my profile, because I feel like I want to be honest, and since I'm not interested in checking out other people, I think the next step is for me to delete my profile. He might appreciate it, who knows. If not, it might freak him out, but if he really likes me, it might not. And like I said, I don't expect him to delete his until he is ready.
veggirl Posted February 27, 2012 Posted February 27, 2012 If you don't want other guys to contact you, just delete it. You don't have to tell him you did. If he asks, you can just say "Yeah I was sick of getting mail from there" or whatever. What's the big deal again? If you've been on quite a few dates, having the whole "are you seeing other people" convo isn't a stretch!
monkey00 Posted February 27, 2012 Posted February 27, 2012 I see what you mean. However, I don't plan on asking him to delete his profile until he brings it up on his own. I just want to delete my profile, because I feel like I want to be honest, and since I'm not interested in checking out other people, I think the next step is for me to delete my profile. He might appreciate it, who knows. If not, it might freak him out, but if he really likes me, it might not. And like I said, I don't expect him to delete his until he is ready. Well this could be a good opportunity to test the waters and see if he is relationship ready/material. I think in most cases, people will know after a few dates on whether they want a relationship with someone. But I think your reasons for taking your profile are reasonable. It's for personal reasons and not because you expect him to take down his or pressure him into it. I wouldn't be freaked out about that being a guy.
FitChick Posted February 27, 2012 Posted February 27, 2012 If he's left his up, you could leave yours up but don't open it. He will probably be checking to see the last time you were online. If weeks go by, he may tell you that he's deleted or is going to delete his profile. That is your cue to say, "I've totally forgotten mine is still up. I'll delete mine, too."
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