sooniechan Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 So, the other day, I was going through my bf's phone (with his permission) and looked at his messages. I saw he was texting his ex gf. Essentially, he was saying that she was still the love of his life and feels like he is missing out now since she seems to have changed for the better. He also told me after I brought it up to him that he had lunch with her before he saw me that day. Am I wrong to be upset and hurt by it? He seems to think that since he apologized that I should just be over it.
LovJoy Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 Of course you should not be hurt or upset by this, heavens forbid. He did say sorry after all for cheating on you emotionally and maybe with his penis inside her vagina. What a nice guy he is....i think he is right, you being all crazy and should just get over the cheating and him saying his ex who he saw few days back, is THE love of his life...what a keeper...you are one lucky woman with zero self respect and esteem.
norajane Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 He would be my ex-bf if I found out he was lunching with his ex and telling her she's the love of his life and he feels he is missing out. I'd pack up his stuff and tell him he is welcome to go get what he thinks he is missing out on because I certainly wouldn't have anything more to do with him. 4
lemonlegs Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 I agree with everyone above (minus Joy's hostility of course.) You should most definitely leave. Clearly he wants to his ex back, so let him have her.
veggirl Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 Wait. Why are you still with this guy? You should dump him stat. He will leave you the second he has another chance with his ex. You know that, right? Why would you be okay KNOWING you are his 2nd choice? 1
TaraMaiden Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 I take it you're talking about your EX bf...? I certainly hope so, by now..... Man, if I'd been in your shoes, he wouldn't even have finished the sentence, he'd be nursing a bruised jaw......
Ruby Slippers Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 For me, the relationship would be dead. I'd end it immediately.
DonVee Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 He would be my ex-bf if I found out he was lunching with his ex and telling her she's the love of his life and he feels he is missing out. I'd pack up his stuff and tell him he is welcome to go get what he thinks he is missing out on because I certainly wouldn't have anything more to do with him. I totally agree!
Author sooniechan Posted February 23, 2012 Author Posted February 23, 2012 I apologize; I didn't say that he's my ex now. I guess I wanted to know that I'm not crazy c.c
Negative Nancy Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 So, the other day, I was going through my bf's phone (with his permission) and looked at his messages. I saw he was texting his ex gf. Essentially, he was saying that she was still the love of his life and feels like he is missing out now since she seems to have changed for the better. He also told me after I brought it up to him that he had lunch with her before he saw me that day. Am I wrong to be upset and hurt by it? He seems to think that since he apologized that I should just be over it. no you're right to be upset about this and i would dump him. sounds like he just settled for you and you're nothing more than the 2nd choice. i bet if she wanted him back he'd dump you in a heartbeat. i would not want to wait around for that day, so a pre-emptive strike seems in order here.
CarrieT Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 Hoping the OP will report back why she is staying with him...
FrustratedStandards Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 The fact that you're even ASKING what to do implies that you have no backbone and are a doormat.
Anela Posted February 24, 2012 Posted February 24, 2012 Why don't you ask your boyfriend how he feels about his ex-girlfriend being with others guys, and possibly telling them that she loves them.. or how he would have felt if he'd found evidence of her telling an ex - when she was with him - that he was the love of her life, and that she'd been seeing him again? then see how he would feel about an apology fixing everything.
Ranchero44 Posted February 24, 2012 Posted February 24, 2012 I apologize; I didn't say that he's my ex now. I guess I wanted to know that I'm not crazy c.c I'm glad you got rid of him because what he did is outright cruel. Why on EARTH would he let you look through his messages and then tell you he went out to lunch with her? What a passive-aggressive jerk. Trust me, he was basically asking you to break up with him. That way, you can be the responsible party and then sit around wondering if you are crazy, and he's off the hook. What a coward. Move on and don't look back.
reptilelover88 Posted February 24, 2012 Posted February 24, 2012 I agree with everything that's already been said. PLEASE dump him. I spent ten months with a man who also treated me outrageously and showed time and time again that he didn't love me, yet he expected me to be okay with lame apologies and excuses. I am very happy that we are no longer together, and regret the time I did spend with him. You're so much better off out of this relationship.
Leigh 87 Posted February 24, 2012 Posted February 24, 2012 If my boyfriend even had FEELINGS for his ex, I would leave him, until he either got with her, or got over it. I know how it feels, to a lesser extent - my boyfriend, out of 24 years, only found one other girl, before me, who he was madly in love with. SHe was AMAZING, by all accounts... problem is, she lived on the other side of the world. And, to be honest, was prob a little too out of hsi league, long term ( speaks 5 languages, has a masters degree at 23, travels the world, nas afford sky diving and thrills eeing things that he would lovbe to have done, is crazy but nice, the most popular girl u could meet, and BEAUTIFUL) They travelled together for a few months, then webnt back to the home countries. It took him a year or more to fully get over her. If they met again, I am sure he would feel a spark, and feelings towards her. For n ow though, he loves me truly and deaply, and she is just an AMAZING, stunning, remarkable girl. hsi love is strong enough for me to not feel it anymore, though. PLEASE, leave this guy ASAP, and find a guy who considers U to be the love of his life.
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