simplyhappy73 Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 My bf of 6 months was sexting a 15 year old. he is 35. (before we were together). This creeps me out a bit, but I talked to him and he said she answered his ex gf's phone and he was drunk and it was innocent flirting ect...but still. Thoughts? Thanks!
DonVee Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 Did he know that she was 15 when the sexting was going on???
Negative Nancy Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 i would dump this creep on the spot. 5
DonVee Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 "Red Flag"... I don't care how drunk he was he knew better! 1
Author simplyhappy73 Posted February 23, 2012 Author Posted February 23, 2012 ahhhh I knew all this was coming:( Im not stupid, but I do love him and he is a great guy. I think it was just a stupid decision. I dont see him ever doing something like that again.
mickleb Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 And he chose to 'sext' his ex GF's younger sister?? Double :sick:. Please leave.
mickleb Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 ahhhh I knew all this was coming:( Im not stupid, but I do love him and he is a great guy. I think it was just a stupid decision. I dont see him ever doing something like that again. Oh no! The excusing! It's going to be hard to accept that the guy you love is this guy but he is! How did you find out?
DonVee Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 Oh no! The excusing! It's going to be hard to accept that the guy you love is this guy but he is! How did you find out? I totally agree... Don't let love blind you to the obvious you can do better!
Author simplyhappy73 Posted February 23, 2012 Author Posted February 23, 2012 it was his ex's new bf's daughter. anyways, I'm not trying to make excuses. We all have done stupid s**t when we're drunk. But this one is the lowest of the low I know. Does it mean he's a pedophile? I don't think so. A pervert? I have paid attention when we go out, he's eyes are on me. Most of the time lol
ditzchic Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 RUN!!!! NOW!!! He'll probably end up on the sex offender registry someday. There are absolutely no excuses for this. And for Christ's sake, stop defending him!
norajane Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 Why was he contacting his ex gf in the first place? No, he's not a pedophile. Pre-pubescent children are the targets of pedophiles, not teenagers. But it is creepy and bordering on illegal, due to their ages.
mickleb Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 it was his ex's new bf's daughter. anyways, I'm not trying to make excuses. We all have done stupid s**t when we're drunk. But this one is the lowest of the low I know. Does it mean he's a pedophile? I don't think so. A pervert? I have paid attention when we go out, he's eyes are on me. Most of the time lol It means, at 35, he doesn't think there's anything wrong with being sexual with a 15 year old. Do you? 1
xxoo Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 It makes him a creep. Don't write off sexting as "innocent flirting". Innocent flirting is "Hi, beautiful." Sexting is NOT innocent flirting.
mickleb Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 (edited) No, he's not a pedophile. Pre-pubescent children are the targets of pedophiles, not teenagers. Not sure I agree with this. In court, if he'd acted on anything, he'd be a paedophile. It makes him someone who can't distinguish between right and wrong when it comes to his physical desires. It does not make him good boyfriend material. Edited February 23, 2012 by mickleb
ditzchic Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 It makes him a creep. Don't write off sexting as "innocent flirting". Innocent flirting is "Hi, beautiful." Sexting is NOT innocent flirting. Agree. I've always found sexting to be rather awkward to begin with. And guys that try and do it to me gross me out a bit. Flirting is "I can't until I see you tonight, sexy." "I'm thinking about xxxx while I xxxxx your xxxxx. Here's a d*ck pic." is weird.
Author simplyhappy73 Posted February 23, 2012 Author Posted February 23, 2012 I'm sure you'll think this is another excuse but, although he is a very attractive man, he has a very low self image. Maybe it made him feel good, he had a young girl interested in him. She did look like 20 something. I dont know, I'm just throwing stuff out there.
DonVee Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 it was his ex's new bf's daughter. anyways, I'm not trying to make excuses. We all have done stupid s**t when we're drunk. But this one is the lowest of the low I know. Does it mean he's a pedophile? I don't think so. A pervert? I have paid attention when we go out, he's eyes are on me. Most of the time lol You are right people do tend to do stupid things while intoxicated, however... I seriously doubt that he gets drunk and unknowingly do things that are out of character that's like saying a heterosexual man will willing and knowingly indulge in sexting with homosexual man because he's drunk!!! It's unexceptionable and there is no excuse he knew what he was doing when he did it which leaves me to believe that deep down inside he is not right... Listen to yourself and if you asked the question apparently you were concerned about it, follow your first mind and don't ignore the warning signs!
ditzchic Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 I'm sure you'll think this is another excuse but, although he is a very attractive man, he has a very low self image. Maybe it made him feel good, he had a young girl interested in him. She did look like 20 something. I dont know, I'm just throwing stuff out there. Stop throwing stuff out there. He's a creeper. The more you defend him the more I think maybe you actually do deserve the guy....
kaylan Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 (edited) What grown man who actually has a good head on his shoulders, flirts with 15 year olds? And in a sexual manner? wow...big ole red flag here. Creeper status. I really wonder about my gender sometimes. Why the hell are dudes so much more apt to behaving this way towards kids than women are? Im sure we all, man or woman, sometimes notice a teenager thats more developed than usual. Hell I worked at a youth center this past summer, and a couple of the girls were as filled out as chicks my age. Some of the guys were bigger than me, yet only 15 or 16. One was pretty freaking built and had me feeling jealous. But as an ADULT, you know better than to ever let your mind stray to far. And you never dare act inappropriately towards them. We know they are kids, and see them as such. And your boyfriend is 35 OP? Its one thing if he was 18, 19, or 20...but fvking 35? Wow...if he doesnt see what he did as inappropriate then hes got a screw loose. Ive seen teenagers that young as kids in my eyes ever since I was 20. Your boyfriend needs to chill. Edited February 23, 2012 by kaylan 1
kiss_andmakeup Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 Gross. This is the stuff of "To Catch a Predator" on Dateline. Stop making excuses for him; it's pathetic. Dump him, he's a total creep. 1
xxoo Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 I'm sure you'll think this is another excuse but, although he is a very attractive man, he has a very low self image. Maybe it made him feel good, he had a young girl interested in him. She did look like 20 something. I dont know, I'm just throwing stuff out there. So what will he do the next time he feels bad about himself? This is not reassuring AT ALL.
Eve Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 To even be asking these questions and thinking about yourself and him and not the child says everything, OP. Please stay with him. It is better that these types are occupied with like minded persons. Take care, Eve x 1
kaylan Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 (edited) I'm sure you'll think this is another excuse but, although he is a very attractive man, he has a very low self image. Maybe it made him feel good, he had a young girl interested in him. She did look like 20 something. I dont know, I'm just throwing stuff out there. Its one thing if he didnt know how old she was, thought she was older, and then proceeded to flirt. However, your boyfriend knowingly behaved sexually inappropriate with a minor. He knew she was only 15. If you had a daughter and a guy did this to her, would you overlook this behavior from a 35 year old man? Edited February 23, 2012 by kaylan 1
Recommended Posts