Pirate Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 Ok, so last week on valentines day I got blown off by my valentine, this guy I liked, he is arrogant and full of himself and instead of causing drama with him, i said "screw it" and went out to the bar anyway. I ran into this great guy and he took me out to dinner the next day and we clicked instantly. Talked for hours, hung out the next day and later on in the week and we just get along great. Two nights ago he told me that he was a little scared to have another relationship because he has been hurt a lot, I listened to him but didn't respond because I didn't know exactly what to say. Last night I went out for mardi gras and said "hey sexy, I won't have my phone on me tonight but I will be at the bar so if you want, come find me in my mask if not, have a goodnight!" I went inside and I ran into the guy that blew me off on valentines day at the bar, he was rude and kept trying to get me to come to his house and "talk" but i turned him down and when the bar closed I left. I checked my phone and noticed that I never got a response from my new guy, I thought maybe he was worried because I go out a lot (almost everyday) so I did the worst thing ever. I drunk dialed him, told him he doesn't have to worry, and I had a fustrating night and I'm worried about getting hurt too yada yada. I don't remember everything that was said but it was 2am, I've only known the guy for 7 days, and I seemed super clingy and weird calling him for no reason. Turns out, he didn't text me back because he got alluminum in his eyes at work and his eyes felt like sandpaper... I feel stupid. He called me this morning after I apologized to him and said that he's tripping because I seemed a little psycho calling him at 2am and we just met. I tried to explain myself and he was really nice about it so I think we're ok, but I still know that theres gotta be a little awkwardness now. How do I fix this? He's a very busy guy, runs his own house, works nonstop, has a daughter that he sees on the weekend and wakes up at 5:30 every morning to go to the gym. I'm very independent, live on my own, have my own hobbies and sports like snowboarding and I have my own life going on but when I get a little alcohol in my system I tend to be a chatterbox and say more than I should
ScienceGal Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 If this guy has a little girl, do you really think that he is looking to be in a relationship with someone that goes out every night? Someone that can't maintain enough control and drunk dials at 2am? And, if he goes to the gym early each morning, I doubt he is going out as much as you are. I'm not criticizing you, I've been there. But, it doesn't seem like you share the same lifestyle. I would just back off. Perhaps it could work, but based upon what you wrote it doesn't seem likely. Good luck.
Author Pirate Posted February 23, 2012 Author Posted February 23, 2012 We've talked about it, and he said the only thing he is missing in his life is a good girl, and he wants me to have my own life, he wants me to go out and do my thing and just meet up with him when we both have time. He likes to go out, but he only can rarely. We don't have the same lifestyle, but we do have some weird chemistry going on so he said we'll take it day by day and see what happens. I'm just embarrassed I drunk dialed him
D-Lish Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 (edited) The best thing to do is to back way off and let him come to you. It seems like he's giving off the vibe that he's not into getting overly serious right now, so pay attention to those words. People don't say things like that unless they mean it. The drunk dial can be forgotten. You've apologized for it, leave it at that- don't apologize again or draw attention to that again. It might make him wonder a little bit- but if you back off and play it cool, things can be mended. I do believe that it is true that a man with a child and a lot of responsibility probably isn't going to want to get serious with someone that parties every night. Conversely, are you at a stage in your life where you want to slow right down and give up going out and having fun? You may have chemistry- but that does not equal compatibility and should never be mistaken for it. Just something to think about. Edited February 23, 2012 by D-Lish
Author Pirate Posted February 23, 2012 Author Posted February 23, 2012 Thank you, he texted me after work and said "hey sweety, I'm home now but I had a long day" I offered to help him with anything if he needs it and he said k, thanks. I figured it's better that I offer to help with materialistic things other than talking about emotional things or about the phone call. I don't go out every night, just a lot, and I don't drink often, just last night being a special occasion I decided to drink a little extra. (bad idea). He loves to go out and he wants to, that's how i met him, at a bar and he was drinking too, but he's very busy and doesn't have the time
D-Lish Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 Don't offer to help him with anything, if he says he's tired, tell him to have a rest and take care. Then go about doing your own thing. You're doing more harm than good by making yourself so available to him.
Author Pirate Posted February 23, 2012 Author Posted February 23, 2012 darn it.. ok, all i said was "i'm gonna be busy today and until tomorrow night but if you want, i can help you tomorrow after work or friday morning before you pick up your baby girl" and he said "ok thanks" and i said "how are your eyes?" (because of the alluminum he got in them) and he said "they're a lot better, thank you for asking :)" and i said "no problemo, call if you need me to get anything for them" and that was it. I'll just leave it at that and see where it goes. The fact that he texted me back after work and called me sweety made me feel better so I think we're ok but I guarantee it kinda offset us a little
whichwayisup Posted February 23, 2012 Posted February 23, 2012 You JUST met this guy and he's your sweety already? Back off slightly and stop offering to help him so much.. He hasn't taken you up on any offers, so just relax and take things slowly. Whatever you do, don't ask to meet his child. Let HIM bring that up in conversation.
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