Dirtyeggroll Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 (edited) So as soon as I found out that I contracted a strain of HPV i went and met up with my gf to tell her because I felt it was the right thing to do. She was pissed off and left. She is still angry. I told her that I would leave her alone for a couple and days and not text her anymore to give her time to cool down. I kept to my word and haven't texted her. But the two days after we talked, she initiated all contact both days and we agreed that we hated not talking to each other. Yesterday she told me to text her the next day. That was yesterday. So today we have been talking all day and it seemed just like old times and that nothing was up. Then she just text me and says " I can't keep pretending everything is alright between us. The more I talk about it and the more I think about it the more mad I get. Im sorry but I think I really need a break from you." I answered with a simple "ok". And she said " I'm really sorry about all of this.'' Really? What does she have to be sorry for? I just don't know what to do. I am in love with this girl and I might lose her because of an STD that I contracted a few months back before we were dating. I can't help that I got it. I'm hoping its just because she is really mad. And once she calms down she will realize that what we have is worth it and will not want to give what we have up. Regardless I am going to act like idc and that I DGAF. I really do care about her still but I am not going to let myself overdue it. Sure I screwed things up a couple of times, but I am human and make mistakes and I am still a good person. The important thing is that I have learned from these screw ups and I fixed things and made things better than ever between us. I would NOT consider this whole STD thing a "Screw up". It was an unfortunate accident that started from 2 months before we were even dating. All I know is that I did the right thing for telling her the moment I was diagnosed. I didn't hide it and act like a coward by keeping it a secret from her. Everyone deserves honesty and that is exactly what I gave her. Hopefully after a couple of days, once she is not so mad, she will realize that what her and I have holds too much value to just throw away like that and that leaving me for something like and STD like HPV is foolish. We should be working through this small road bump together not alone and split up. If she doesn't realize this I have a feeling that she will eventually regret her decision. I am sure she will regret it because if my ex gf (before this one) was a huge ***** and was a horrible gf was able to realize that I am a great guy and that she was dumb to leave me then my current gf will realize the same exact thing as my current gf is on a whole different level or maturity and she is smart and reasonable with a good head on her shoulders. All in all i am proud of the way that I handled things and if things are meant to be then we will be together whether that be in a couple of months or a year. I planned on completely shutting her out for a week and giving her, her space and waiting for her to come to me. And depending on things are I will give her one long, big talk as to why we should stay together and my feelings etc. Sorry for the rant i am just trying to figure out how to handle all of this and could use some suggestions. Edited February 21, 2012 by Dirtyeggroll
silvermercy Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 That's quite unfortunate. But don't absolve yourself of all responsibility if you ever want a second chance with her. It was an unfortunate accident, sure, but that also means: 1. you hadn't taken proper precaution measures either BEFORE or AFTER you met her, 2. you didn't get a proper STD test panel all this time before sleeping with her (or repeated it after a few months as you should have). These responsibilities fall on both of you actually, so you should have at least discussed all these prior to sleeping together. Keep that in mind in the future, too. Good luck.
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 I agree that she shares responsibility for leaving herself open to risk of contracting something via unprotected sex. BUT, if you really are in love with her, acting like you don't give a F is not a very good tactic. I am not advocating groveling. I suggest you give her space, but first, apologizing for your part in this mess one more time. Do let her know how you feel and that you dearly hope that she will come to feel the same and the two of you can be together. Then leave her alone.
Author Dirtyeggroll Posted February 21, 2012 Author Posted February 21, 2012 That's quite unfortunate. But don't absolve yourself of all responsibility if you ever want a second chance with her. It was an unfortunate accident, sure, but that also means: 1. you hadn't taken proper precaution measures either BEFORE or AFTER you met her, 2. you didn't get a proper STD test panel all this time before sleeping with her (or repeated it after a few months as you should have). These responsibilities fall on both of you actually, so you should have at least discussed all these prior to sleeping together. Keep that in mind in the future, too. Good luck. The thing is that I used a condom when I contracted hpv. And also right before having sex with this girl I got tested and everything was clean. That was two months ago. The other problem is that there are no tests that can determine you have hpv unless you have physical symptoms which I didn't have at the time.
kaylan Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 ^Really? You sure? Cus you didnt make these facts known in your last thread if I recall correctly. Btw, has she gone in for testing? Testing will pick up HPV in women, but not in men.
Author Dirtyeggroll Posted February 21, 2012 Author Posted February 21, 2012 ^Really? You sure? Cus you didnt make these facts known in your last thread if I recall correctly. Btw, has she gone in for testing? Testing will pick up HPV in women, but not in men. She is getting tested next monday
Untouchable_Fire Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 The thing is that I used a condom when I contracted hpv. And also right before having sex with this girl I got tested and everything was clean. That was two months ago. The other problem is that there are no tests that can determine you have hpv unless you have physical symptoms which I didn't have at the time. How do you know that you didn't get it FROM your GF?
Author Dirtyeggroll Posted February 22, 2012 Author Posted February 22, 2012 How do you know that you didn't get it FROM your GF? I guess i don't know 100% but the odds are in her favor. Her sexual history is: One other guy (who was her ex bf) . Her ex cheated on her twice but they broke up almost over a year ago. Idk how often girls get pap smears, but I believe that if she had a abnormal pap smear she would have said something and refrained from sex. My sexual history is : 10 previous partners.
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