anxiousguy29 Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 Hi everyone, I'm a new poster here but lurked for a bit. I apologize for the length of this post but I really am at my wits end here. About me: 29 years old, lawyer, work full time and doing night classes to get LLM. I'm just under 6 feet, A bit overweight (195), but have no problem getting dates. If I had to rate myself I'd say a 7 in looks with a personalty that generally gets the girl. I am pretty shy although maybe anxious is a bit of a stretch. I normally seriously date one or two girls at a time and maybe have a couple girls who I casually date as well. Her: 25, studying for medical school. She is everything I am looking for a woman flat out. Amazingly sexy, bright, funny, sarcastic, etc. etc. I could go on and on. I met this girl on NYE while out with my friends and we hit it off pretty well. She gave me her number and I called a couple days later to set up a first date. We had lot's of flirting back and forth before our first date and during the first date I got a nice kiss. Since then we have been dating pretty heavily considering the fact that she is studying her butt off every night and working 40 hours a week in a clinic as well. I will say that while she has been to my house, she has not slept over and we have not had sex. Since we started dating, she has told me that she has another guy who she is semi-interested in. She sees him on a regular basis as they are in the same church group and she goes to church 2 or 3 times every week. She has been very open about her relationship with this guy since the beginning although she insists she has not so much as kissed him yet but she is attracted to the fact that they are from the same background (she's Colombian, I'm American) and religion (she's an Evangelical, I'm Jewish). I've been casually dating a couple other women in the mean time but none of them were/are getting my full attention. So, fast forward to this past weekend where we went to my buddy's wedding together. To note, I casually mentioned that I was going to this wedding some time back in the beginning of January and she sort of invited herself as my date. So we're at the wedding and having a nice time. All the while she is receiving and sending text messages as well as repeatably using the rest room. I say something to the effect of, "is everything ok," and she tells me that it's the guy texting her (about the fact that she missed the Saturday church group). I make sure not to let it show that I was a bit bothered by her texting him at this time, especially because it was rude during the wedding. We eat, drink, dance, and have a real nice time. My buddy's wife to be and her really hit it off and we made plans to hang out as couples in a few weeks. Then the drive home comes. It was about 60 miles from the wedding to her parent's house, so I stop for gas. She is acting a bit distant and won't look up from the camera I brought and keeps flipping through the pictures over and over. I get out a put the gas nozzle in the tank and casually go around to her side door and open it and ask her what's up. She pretty much tells me that she is going through so much drama right now with the studying, working, and that she is ready to cut everyone off (including me and her friends) and just study for the next 2 months (her test in May 1st). I try and act indifferent about her decision but I say something to the effect of, I really care for you and I respect your decision and if that is what you want then you have your wish. When I get back in the car I put on the music and just kind of keep to myself. She starts rubbing my ears, back and kissing my neck a bit but I sort of ignore it. She asks why I am not paying her any mind and I say that I just don't want to be hurt (which is true, I find myself falling for her). She insists a million times that in May she will be the best girlfriend I've ever had and will devote herself to me 100%. When I dropped her off she sent me a text basically saying, "sorry for acting so childish and not knowing what I want." Sunday we spoke on the phone a bit (after she went to church) and she sort of reiterated her position and I say, well it really sucks because I like you, I know you like me but I respect your position and will honor it. So, it's Monday night now and I'm missing her like crazy. My problem is this...the guy, the other guy, while not able to contact her on the phone maybe, will still get to see and hang out with her for several hours a week. I am not really a jealous guy but I can't help but feel that I wish I was in his position and not mine. I guess I am just afraid of losing her during this interim time because I am unable to continue to make her desire me without talking to her or seeing her. So LS, please help me with my next step. ag29
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