SmileFace Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 I am not arguing. I will p.m when I clear out my inbox. I think we have a different communication style. I am truthfully just wishing you burst out of your shell and do better. I don't like sugar costing stuff so you may perceived my messages differently.
Titania22 Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 LOL! Never mind then. Titania I don't know what to say anymore. Sorry Somedude. There are always exceptions.
somedude81 Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 I am not arguing. I will p.m when I clear out my inbox. I think we have a different communication style. I am truthfully just wishing you burst out of your shell and do better. I don't like sugar costing stuff so you may perceived my messages differently. I am trying to burst out of my shell. I just need something else to burst into Sorry Somedude. There are always exceptions. Yup.
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 I have the impression that from Somedude's perspective, the traumas of being molested as a child or being married to a violent psychopath are insignificant in comparison to his suffering about not having any dates.
Disenchantedly Yours Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 Yes, it's true. Being molested as a child or being married to a violent psychopath are terrible situations. However, who are you to shame someone else for whatever problems they may face? And why do you so often feel the need to mock and degrade those that face different issues that might not be as nearly terrible as the ones you listed?
denise_xo Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 I'm not interested in numbers, but I'm interested in how a man talks about his previous relationships or sexual encounters. 1
Disenchantedly Yours Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 i totally agree with that denise.
SmileFace Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 Yes, it's true. Being molested as a child or being married to a violent psychopath are terrible situations. However, who are you to shame someone else for whatever problems they may face? And why do you so often feel the need to mock and degrade those that face different issues that might not be as nearly terrible as the ones you listed? I hope that is not the message that my reply conveyed. I am not playing "my life is worse". I only stated what happened with me to show that if I can have a positive outlook on dating, even with what I have experienced. I am in no way discounting anyone's experiences. .
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 Yes, it's true. Being molested as a child or being married to a violent psychopath are terrible situations. However, who are you to shame someone else for whatever problems they may face? And why do you so often feel the need to mock and degrade those that face different issues that might not be as nearly terrible as the ones you listed? I'm not "mocking" or "shaming." I take exception to Somedude's constant assertions that nothing any woman experiences with regards to sex or relationships, including violence, rape and molestation, can possibly be as bad as his feeling of rejection. And if he wants to take it up with me, he certainly can without your "help." Speaking of "shaming," isn't that your area of expertise? For example: Most men rather jerk off to porn in this day and age. They don't want to get to know or deal with a real woman. So they rather escape to porn then deal with life. That's no big shock. In fact you are neglecting your patrol of about 295773 threads where you should be jumping in to shame and berate men for their sexuality. Now, quit slacking and get busy.
verhrzn Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 Very late coming into this thread, but simple answer is: A guy's number could be anywhere from 0 to mid-twenties without me blinking too much. (The extremes in either direction will obviously make me blink more.) Honestly, for me, the circumstances AROUND the number is a lot more insightful and interesting than the number itself.
denise_xo Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 Very late coming into this thread, but simple answer is: A guy's number could be anywhere from 0 to mid-twenties without me blinking too much. (The extremes in either direction will obviously make me blink more.) Honestly, for me, the circumstances AROUND the number is a lot more insightful and interesting than the number itself. As in, minus fifteen??
oaks Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 I'm not interested in numbers, but I'm interested in how a man talks about his previous relationships or sexual encounters. That's been my experience when partners have talked to me about this, too. Some have also talked about numbers, but that seemed to be more out of curiosity than in order to pass a test.
Disenchantedly Yours Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 I hope that is not the message that my reply conveyed. I am not playing "my life is worse". I only stated what happened with me to show that if I can have a positive outlook on dating, even with what I have experienced. I am in no way discounting anyone's experiences. . No, that response wasn't to you SmileFace. It was to Mme.
somedude81 Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 (edited) I'm not "mocking" or "shaming." I take exception to Somedude's constant assertions that nothing any woman experiences with regards to sex or relationships, including violence, rape and molestation, can possibly be as bad as his feeling of rejection. And if he wants to take it up with me, he certainly can without your "help." How the hell did you jump to that conclusion? Frankly, I don't even know those things even related to the topic of the thread. Edited February 21, 2012 by somedude81
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 How the hell did you jump to that conclusion? Frankly, I don't even know those things even related to the topic of the thread. It doesn't, Somedude. You regularly say that no woman can possibly have it as bad as you do. When a woman shares something traumatic that she has experienced in the context of sex or a relationship, such as Titania telling us her husband was a psychopath or smileface telling us that she was molested as a child, you go right back to your go-to place: "Well, you're a woman and everybody wants you, so what do you have to complain about." It's insulting.
Dream_Theater Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 My number is 6, my bf's number is around 80. I don't care to be honest, he has some awesome sexual skills I doubt he'd have if he had only slept with a couple of women, and I kinda like that while he clearly wasn't choosy over who he slept with (and is honest enough to admit that) he has always been very choosy over who he has a relationship with and as such has only had two short (2-8 months) relationships before ours (he's 26). So despite the fact that he's slept with lots of women, I feel really really special to him.
only_quotes_jerks Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 this question is such a double standard. I'm betting that the vast majority of women would not answer truthfully. And that's because they know that their number is too high. My guess is that most women around 30 have been with at least 15 guys, and that's just bad.
Titania22 Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 Very late coming into this thread, but simple answer is: A guy's number could be anywhere from 0 to mid-twenties without me blinking too much. (The extremes in either direction will obviously make me blink more.) Honestly, for me, the circumstances AROUND the number is a lot more insightful and interesting than the number itself. As in, minus fifteen?? I am sure -15 would make her blink.
silvermercy Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 I grew up in a culture where sex outside relationships is very frowned upon, so... by the age of say 30, a max of 5-6 women (or otherwise he's a man-whore ).
FitChick Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 I really don't care as long as I am the last one. 2
Andy_K Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 It doesn't, Somedude. You regularly say that no woman can possibly have it as bad as you do. When a woman shares something traumatic that she has experienced in the context of sex or a relationship, such as Titania telling us her husband was a psychopath or smileface telling us that she was molested as a child, you go right back to your go-to place: "Well, you're a woman and everybody wants you, so what do you have to complain about." It's insulting. I wonder if he genuinely does feel that way though. Could well be that he's upset enough about his situation he'd genuinely be willing to go through something like gang rape by a bunch of guys if it meant being able to attract members of the opposite sex, get dates & relationships. If that's the case, it's just as insulting to him to suggest that a past trauma earlier in life outweighs his constant and ever-present psychological suffering.
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 I'm really not about belittling his psychological suffering, though I have no patience for the unceasing self pity. Not from anybody, regardless of the reasons for it. It is harmful to a good life. He's completely without empathy or compassion for other peoples experiences; everybody has it better than him. Sorry, but it really bugs.
somedude81 Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 I'm really not about belittling his psychological suffering, though I have no patience for the unceasing self pity. Not from anybody, regardless of the reasons for it. It is harmful to a good life. He's completely without empathy or compassion for other peoples experiences; everybody has it better than him. Sorry, but it really bugs. And what do you expect me to say? As I said before, those issues aren't even related to this thread. Yeah I bitch about my problems, get over it.
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 And what do you expect me to say? As I said before, those issues aren't even related to this thread. Yeah I bitch about my problems, get over it. Okay. And will you stop including the comments about how easy all women have it in your bitchfests? That would be awesome.
serial muse Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 (edited) And what do you expect me to say? As I said before, those issues aren't even related to this thread. Yeah I bitch about my problems, get over it. Oh, come on, somedude, you know that the problem isn't so much you bitching about your problems as it is you negating other peoples'. Saying that no women could possibly have it tough dating, or telling the world that a woman's number is "too high" at a certain age is WAY too judgy for a guy who is constantly asking for peoples' help on here. "Get over it," indeed. Edited February 21, 2012 by serial muse
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