Should i break up with her?

[Sillywings]

I am on the verge of ending it with this girl and im looking for a little advice here, because i dont know what to do.

 

In January we were having some minor arguments because she wasnt paying attention to the relationship, she was canceling our plans often. Then one night she told me her friend is stopping over, and i had this gut feeling that 'friend' was her ex boyfriend, and i was ignored for the next two days, until we ended it for a week. You know that gut reaction i had? I found out two days ago i was right.

 

Would finding out that it was her ex boyfriend she had stay over and sleep in the same bed as her be a deal breaker for you? But she says nothing happened.

Ive lost my trust in her because of this, and its making me question some things, why did she come back and want to work things out with me? A week passed and i was accepting it was over then all of a sudden she was back, and the first thing she said was, she found out her ex boyfriend has a new girlfriend, did she only come back because he was dating someone else? Was i the second option?, but why did she never tell me it was her ex staying over not a friend if nothing was going to happen? She blamed it ending on me and told me i needed to change.

 

Two days ago i also found out the same ex boyfriend recently asked her for a threesome, he wants her to join him and his girlfriend. That tells me she's talking to him and maybe alot more than talking for him to come out with that to her. I asked her to tell him to back off, she laughed and said just be happy im not doing it?

 

Im supposed to be going over hers tomorow and spending the next few days, getting up early and catching the train but i really dont want to go because i feel disgusting and i dont trust her anymore. I feel like i was her second option, i dont even know how to talk about this with her, its made me feel weird with her for the past two days and shes asked whats wrong i told her nothing. I dont wanna go in that bed with her because i dont know who else shes had in it. Even if i do talk about it with her i expect ill be given her usual reaction 'f**k off you d**k head'.

 

Here's the kicker thou.. 8 months dating and we arnt even in an offical relationship yet, she just keeps saying she needs time but still tells me that she loves me. I think she never wants that label so she can use the same line she used on me back in January. 'We werent official anyway'.

 

I think im wasting my time on someone who is gonna hurt me?

 

She told me we were serious, just wouldnt give me the label of a relationship, thats why she has made me on more than 3 occasions get rid of women out of my life that she seen as competition, told me they made her uncomfortable.

Edited February 19, 2012 by Sillywings

[Squish]

It seems to me that all of your gut instincts are correct. She's made you 'get rid' of women on three occasions because they made her uncomfortable, yet when you say the same thing about an ex, she laughs it off and does nothing. Sounds fishy to me.

 

If I were you I would definitely not go to hers. Try to talk to her sensibly and calmly, and if she doesn't listen to your feelings and try to resolve the problem, then I would walk away.

[philt]

i think the same you know how you feel and its for a reason .

i think your better off sitting down and doing her a email so you can make sure you put the points of how you feel and what your not happy with and what you want to change .

before you do that you have to ask yourself do you really want her if you dont trust her whats the point

[Frank13]

She ignores you for two days while her exs is over and tells you nothing happened sexually, even though they slept in the same bed? Then she tells you he wants her to have a threesome.

 

If you believed nothing happened sexually while her ex was there then you deserve to be played by her.

 

I would get away from her and never look back.

 

There is not a single positive thing in all you wrote. This is a major disaster for you waiting to happen. I am actually confused why you would even be questioning any of this.

Edited February 19, 2012 by Frank13

[CaliBabe]

This has warning signs all over it. I think deep down inside you know what you have to do. Although the action of it is alot harder I think the right thing to do is to leave her and move on. How could you ever move forward with her with no trust?

[Orianne]

If you guys aren't 'official' by now, you probably never will be... Honestly, it sounds like she's stringing you along, and I'd run before you waste any more time.

[Cmac]

Yep, if I was you I'd end it

[NeverAgainDC]

Um, this is a no-brainer. End it. There are plenty of women out there who will treat and respect you much more than your current girlfriend. Have some dignity and cut ties. The sooner the better.

[alphamale]

I think im wasting my time on someone who is gonna hurt me?

basically? yes