7list Posted February 17, 2012 Posted February 17, 2012 I (20 M) have been dating a great girl (20) too for a couple of months. We had a long distance friendship for a year or so prior, but we were very close. The problem is that when we hang out with her friends (about half the time we see each other, she invites some people over), I feel totally excluded. They're all Hispanic so they speak Spanish and I am unable to follow along. To make it even worse, she has a few guy friends that she'll sit with and spend the whole evening talking to while I'm on the other side of the room, making me feel pretty jealous. I don't want to be needy and demand that she spend all of her time talking to me, and given we've only been going out for a couple months I don't know what I can really say. What should I do?
Art_Critic Posted February 17, 2012 Posted February 17, 2012 What should I do? Learn Spanish... That is all I have... It doesn't sound like she i doing anything purposefully wrong to you but maybe if you could follow along better you could participate and honestly you might also have a closer relationship with her..
DonVee Posted February 17, 2012 Posted February 17, 2012 I think you should tell her how you feel... If she is not aware that you feel excluded from the group when you are around her and friends how would she know that you feel this way. I don't think it's a bad idea to bring this to her attention
InJest Posted February 17, 2012 Posted February 17, 2012 You've only been dating a couple months. Keep your options open. Don't spend all your time doting on her. Go after other girls, and see what else you might be able to score. You don't have to sleep with them or do anything physical, but who knows what your girl is doing when you're not around. If you find someone you like better, drop this girl. In the process of chasing other girls, she'll notice that you're not so into her, and she may bring it up. Then you tell her that she's always hanging on other guys, so you didn't think she wanted a serious relationship. You could also bring up an open relationship directly with her, but this could backfire if she agrees. Personally, I think you should still be chasing other girls until she proves she's committed.
Feelin Frisky Posted February 17, 2012 Posted February 17, 2012 Don't be surprised but in other cultures it happens that girls like to make men jealous and actually fight for them. I've had it foisted upon me both by a foreign born Latina and an American-born Italian. That's where the "hot blood" remark has some roots. If it's not working for you, start thinking about moving on. You're 20 and there will be more decisions to face about the fit of a relationship.
ThatDudeXO Posted February 17, 2012 Posted February 17, 2012 You haven't been dating that long. Just know that you've got yourself a very friendly and sociable girl, which is much better than a quiet boring girl. Don't deprive her of her friends, that is the worst you can do. Just expect less from her until you are very serious in the relationship and spend more time with your friends. If this girl really likes you then it will all work out. I get the idea you're putting all your time and effort on this girl which is completely wrong, spend more time with your own friends and then try to get some alone time with your gf, take her out to dinner, cinema, a night out or even take her to another city or town for the weekend. Make sure you make the time spent with her special not just time spent together. I made that mistake and lost my love.
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