bwatson Posted February 17, 2012 Posted February 17, 2012 Hi all , i read a thread ( bottom of this mail ) that spoke so closely to what i have been going through, almost like i wrote it myself , or this person dated the same girl. I will elaborate more but the below is quite close , she is addicted to CAT ( methcanthinone ) i thought it was a once a year thing , then weekly , now i realise its daily. mood swings , lies , tremors , nausea , nightmares , fever , sweats where i can smell and taste the chemicals , no concept of time , drops me , devilish hatred and mood swings. she has had hectic stuff happen to her , abuse , physical , emotional , i think recently sexually but she wouldnt tell me. she said she was approached by a devil cult and after this scare seemed like she wanted to go straight.. wanted to marry me , have my kids etc , 24 hours later she broke up with me to get back with her druggie ex boyfriend..... i am left broken ---------------------------------------------------- I went out with this girl for about 5 months. She was crazy about me. Said I was the best boyfriend she ever had. Only problem was she was a recovering drug addict. She relapsed after five months, I did everything I could to get her clean (zannax, coke, oxy). Her therapist said I probably saved her life. Told her parents what was happening. She got clean for like a week, told me she needed space, i sort of freaked and she broke up with me. She would still call me in the middle of the night and ask me if I was screwing other girls. I told her no and shed says she missed me. I got a little desperate and called her a lot to hang out but she kept flaking. A few weeks later we meet up she says she loves me and that she just needs time. I find that she has been using occasionally but not enough to sustain her habit because her parents had been tracking her funds. She had been hanging out with this other drug addict and I told her not to do it anymore or it would upset me. She said she loved me and couldn't stand the thought of losing me. Later I find out that she brought the addict to her house and when I found out she kicked him out and said she called the police on him because he was threatening her. I stop talking to her for a few days, she begged me to take her back... I caved. Again she said she loved me, a week goes by she acts distant and then I find out she is trying to buy Molly from my friend. I ***** her out and she dumps me. The next day I tell her I love her and she needs to make the decision to get better and that I think I've become too dependent on her, i say this crying. She says she cares about me a lot but says she is having a lot of fun without any attachments and that she is going to make me a painting and tries to cut the conversation short. I concede. I go no contact but I see that she is putting hearts on this other guys pics a few days after and saying how adorable he is. This is apparently the guy she was trying to get molly with. Later I find out she deleted me on facebook. I didn't post or like anything on her page or make any contact... This girl meant a lot too me and I did a lot for her. I lost a lot of sleep, instead of her being a part of my life she became my life when she relapsed. I thought I was in love and I'm hurting. Its sick but Im still deluding myself that she'll get clean and come back and be the person I met. She'll be at my uni in 3 months and im pretty sure we are going to have class together. I realize that she is too immature and insecure for any sort of meaningful relationship. I just hope one day she is, and if its not me, its a kind guy cuz underneath all the **** is a great person.
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