My very recent break-up story.

[wellsaid]

First of all, hi! This is my first post. I've been stalking this forum for the past day or so trying to seek advice on my current situation but I couldn't find anything that I thought suited me exactly, so I thought I'd sign up and ask for some help.

 

Well, my relationship of over 2 years ended this week. And I'm absolutely torn in two. She was my first girlfriend, first love, first practically everything. We were in a long distance relationship for one year and then we lived together for the second year. I won't delve into the relationship and say how perfect it was etc. because I think most people have perfect relationships that break regardless. Now before I move onto the current break-up situation I think you should be aware that for the past year we are all each other has had, literally. We were each other's partner, best friend and only friend within where we lived together, so NC is simply not possible and not something we both want either.

 

So, we had another pointless fight on Monday, causing her to leave on Tuesday. I can see all that went wrong in the relationship, I can see all that I did wrong in the relationship, but I'm not naive to think that she didn't do any wrong either, and I'm determined to change that.

 

I want to be with her, I know it's very early days but, I do. I've tried to talk to her about "us" the days that we have been apart and it just makes her angry, she says she can't be with me right now because she doesn't want to get back into a long distance relationship, but she needs a break from me and the situation that we were in, she wants me to act "normal". So I've begun to accept that and I am just starting polite conversation with her, just trying to have a laugh. I'm trying to give her space yet I know that if I didn't make the effort with her to try and talk to her/show her that I want to be with her subtly then she would say that I'm not interested anymore and she would start moaning about it.

 

Now, she says that she wants to come back up here for college beginning August, but she doesn't know if she'll want to be with me then. She's giving me the "time will tell" line. She also said that she'll come up in April to see me, just to meet up and see how things are, but not necessarily to discuss us.

 

Basically, I know she is down there trying to get over me. And I don't want her to. I want her to know that I want her back, whether it's in 2 months or 6 months. From what she is saying to me do you think she has any interest in actually getting back together with me or do you think she's just trying to keep me sweet, and I'll probably end up even more heartbroken in 6 months. Because really the only thing that is keeping me positive right now is the prospect of being with her again in the future.

 

Apologies for the rant, any input/questions on how I should deal with this would be greatly appreciated.

Edited February 17, 2012 by wellsaid

[Thatguyintx]

Can you explain why no contact is not possible? It sounds like you are long distance right now.

 

I can understand not wanting to do NC, but just trying to understand why it's not possible.

[Chi townD]

Yeah, It kinda sounds like that she's trying to get over the anger and get in a better frame of mind to get you into the "friend zone" She wants space? Give it to her. Go complete NC. Tough, I know. But, it's something that you have to do to protect yourself.